Concur
by mikenikes1123
Summary: Edward Cullen is a pig. He only sees girls as warm bodies. Then he makes a bet, and Bella Swan turns his world upside down. Will his views on relationships and women change once he's spent time with the quiet girl from Biology? AH/AU Edward OOC for a bit.
1. Chapter 1

**I know I need to update Into the Dark, and I will! I will! I promise! I just have had this itching my brain for so long and I feel like if I don't get it out, I could never write another chapter of Into the Dark! So don't worry, I will update. **

**Warning: You will not like Edward for a little while in this story :)**

**Disclaimer: They are not mine! Any of them! **

Fucking fuck. Sweat was dripping down my forehead, settling on my eyebrows, occasionally dripping into my eyes. It stung. Why do I put myself through this? Oh yeah, because it feels really fucking good. She did make me feel like a rock star. Her legs were thrown over my shoulders and her tits bounced each time I pounded my cock into her. She's blond, thin, but she's got tits on her that would make any guy drool. But that's really all there is to her. Oh yeah, she's a warm body always up for a quickie before class.

"Don't stop! God, Edward."

Fuck. She did it again. How many times did I have to tell her?

"Stop it."

I growled out my words through clenched teeth, putting more force behind my thrusts. She looked up at me, confused. Did I stutter?

"Stop what?"

I pounded into her again, clamping my eyes shut with the effort.

"Saying...my name. Stop it."

Like she knew me. Like she wanted me. Like she loved me. Like she actually needed me for something more than I needed her. She was nothing but a warm body with the appropriate holes in convenient places. I was nothing more to her, I'm sure. Alice and Emmet liked to tell me otherwise. They say she looks "longingly" at me when I'm not paying attention. Fuck it. No, fuck her. That's what I was going to do.

She didn't speak again after that. Just moans and heavy breathing. Shit. Like she was doing any of the fucking work! Fine. I'd give her a reason to pant like a filthy dog. My lower back muscles tightened as I put everything I had into my thrusts. We only had five minutes before the bell rang and I'd be suspended if I was late again. I pulled out almost all the way and thrust into her one last time.

Ahhhhh. There is was, that sweet release. The only reason I needed Laurie. Oh, wait. No, Laura? Laura. Definitely Laura. I pulled out, put the condom in a tissue I found on the floor of her car, and pulled up my pants. Thank God she had a truck. No way would this have been fun in my Volvo. OK, it would have been fun. But I'm not one for leg cramps. The windows of the truck were fogged up so I couldn't tell if kids were going inside the school yet. I looked down at my watch. One minute to spare. Fuck, I'm good at this.

"Thanks Laura."

"Um, it's Lauren."

"Yeah, that's what I said. Anyway, I gotta go."

Shit, I knew it wasn't Laura. Oh well. I got it wrong the last time too, not like she minded then. I hopped out of the truck and left the door open for her. Time for class. Hell. My own personal fucking hell.

"So, how was Lauren?"

I looked up from the plate of pizza I had in front of me, completely uneaten. How can anybody eat this vile shit? They can't. Cafeteria food has got to be the most disgusting excuse for nutrition on the face of the Earth. Seriously, do they do it on purpose? I always thought bread, tomato sauce, and cheese were pretty easy to combine. Apparently it takes a meeting of the Brain Trust to do it because the lunch ladies at Forks High school were completely incapable. Wait, what the fuck did Emmett say?

"Hnh?"

"_Hnh?_ Seriously, Eduardo. Lauren, I asked how Lauren was."

Who the fuck is Lauren?

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Lauren. The blond with nice tits. You were fucking her in the back of her dad's Suburban?"

Oh. Her. Wait, I thought her name was Laura.

"Like usual. A little lose, I think I was her second today."

But flexible as hell. At least some other prick warmed her up for me. I hated getting to her first. Emmett gave me an agreeing nod. He understood my dilemma. His girlfriend wasn't too happy about that, though. Shocker. Rosalie Hale is never happy about anything. Her fuckable lips turned down in a scowl as she elbowed Emmet in the ribs. Poor sucker. I guess I'd put up with her, too if I got to bang that from behind every night. Hot damn. That bitch has a nice ass. Firm, round, a little wide for my liking but it's something to grab onto.

My sister shook her head at me. I looked over at her with a questioning eyebrow.

"Oh, don't give me that Edward. You're disgusting. Seriously, what is she like, your sixth girl this week?"

"Fourth. I'm not a pig. Give me some credit Ali."

"Your fourth this week."

"Yes. Only four this entire week."

"It's Wednesday, Edward. Wednesday."

I sighed. Poor Alice. A gray hair had sprouted amidst her black spikes the other day. I don't doubt it was from me. She feels responsible for my sexual appetite. I didn't even think about girls until Sophomore year, when Alice convinced me to go out with one of her friends. We went on a few dates, the girl got a little excited, we sucked face, we fucked, and here I am today. A healthy 17 year old boy with entirely unhealthy sex practices. But hey, Laura's not complaining. Oh, wait. Laurie. Yeah, Laurie's not complaining.

Jasper smirked beside her and took another bite of his pizza. OK, I stand corrected. Jasper can eat the vile shit they call 'cafeteria food'. He's a pretty good guy. Actually, he's a really fucking great guy. He's always been the calm one in our little circle. Just me, Alice, Emmett McCarty, Rosalie, and Jasper Hale. Pretty fucking weird that Jasper is fucking my sister and Emmett is fucking his, but hey, it works for us. I don't think we've ever been separated for more than a week at a time since fourth grade. Had we? No, I can't say we were.

"Edmundo? Hell-oo? Edmund. Did you hear anything I just said?"

What the fuck?

"Mother fucker. Edward, can you please stay with us? Or are you fantasizing about Lauren again?"

No, definitely not.

"Sorry. What did you say?"

"For fuck's sake. I asked if you ever thought about getting a real girlfriend."

"No. Never. Why would I need a girlfriend? I can fuck any girl I want in this school."

Hnh. Take that. I don't need a girlfriend. Girlfriends are only good for sex. They're your girlfriend so they have to fuck you. Isn't that how it goes? They feel like they need to impress you to keep you around and shit like that. Well, I already have that without the strings attached so no, I don't need a girlfriend.

"No you can't."

"What?"

"You can't 'fuck any girl you want in this school'. You can't."

"OK, Alice. So I can't fuck you or Rosalie. But that's a given."

She gave an exasperated sigh.

"That's not what I was talking about. I know a girl in this school that would never sleep with you."

No fucking way.

"Who."

It wasn't a question, more of a demand. Who the fuck would never sleep with me? That's impossible! Doesn't she know who I am? I'm her fucking brother! Girls pretend to be friends with her so they can come to our house and see my bedroom. Edward Anthony Cullen. The fucking king of Forks pussy.

"Isabella Swan. Senior. 17, 5'4, brown hair, brown eyes, petite, sits next to you in Biology."

Biology. I couldn't remember the last time I went to Biology. Isabella Swan? Who the fuck is that?

"Who the hell is she and how do you know her?"

"Her father is the police chief. He was telling Dad about her while I was at the hospital. They were discussing an outburst of sexually transmitted diseases in teenagers around here. Oh, Dad wants you to get checked by the way. And umm....what was I saying? Oh, yeah. Well Chief Swan said he was happy that his daughter had made a promise to herself to not have sex until she was married. So, yes. You, Edward Cullen, cannot 'fuck' every single girl in this school."

She smiled, satisfied with herself. The little pixie bounced in her seat while she picked at her pizza in front of her. How the hell does she do that? Just run constantly like she's on overdrive. Like someone changes her batteries too often.

"No. I don't believe you."

Jasper shook his head again, this time at me.

"She's right. I was there. He said it."

Thanks, buddy. I looked over at him in disbelief. There was a girl in Forks High school that wasn't a total slut? I wouldn't accept that. No. I couldn't. I had

fucked, banged, had sex with, shagged, and been fucked by every girl of respectable appearance in this school.

"Aw, what's the matter Edward? Hurt that not every girl falls at your feet?"

"Blow me, Rose. She just doesn't know me yet."

"Regardless, she wouldn't touch you."

"Oh yeah, you wanna fucking bet?"

She smiled a wicked grin, pulling her dick-sucking lips up over her pearly whites. It made my dick twitch a little. She was plotting. The bitch was always plotting.

"Actually, yes. I do."

Fuck yes. Every body at the table dug their hands into their pockets. Betting time. We always did this. One of us would think of a challenge and the others

would bet on its success rate. This was going to be good. We each slapped down a $50 bill.

"I, Rosalie Hale, in all of my sexy glory, declare the following bet: Edward Cullen will not be able to fuck Isabella Swan before prom. That gives him seven months. Any objections?"

Nobody spoke. This Isabella Swan would be next. How could I call myself the fucking king of Forks pussy if I didn't concur all of it? Oh yes, I was going to win this bet.

**Please review. It motivates me :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Not mine, all Meyer's.**

**Warning: Edward is still disgusting and he will be for a while. Sorry!**

**Thanks to those who reviewed. It means so much to me :)**

I couldn't say no. How the fuck would I live it down if I didn't agree to Rose's challenge? It's not like I'm some heartless motherfucker with an attitude problem. There was a little tiny part of my brain that was screaming at me, saying, "Edward, you heartless motherfucker with an attitude problem. This is wrong." But then there was a really fucking big part of my brain that was screaming at me, saying, " Get that pussy Cullen! Get it! Make her forget about her little marriage pact!" Don't we live in a democracy? Majority rules, right? So that's how I decided this was a good idea. Oh, and I've always wanted to nail a virgin. My dick twitched when I thought about it. It's wrong, I guess. But it's supposed to be an irreplaceable feeling. Tight as a fucking drum. Who am I to pass up such an opportunity?

Emmett grunted beside me as he pushed the heavily weighted bar above his chest and towards the ceiling. I always thought of myself as pretty fucking strong, but Emmett takes the cake. I pulled my eyes away from the mirror in front of us, as I was watching myself to correct my form, and looked over. Two-hundred pound weights. Figures. He just couldn't do anything half assed. I looked to my other side at Jasper. His smirk gave him away. He thought Emmett was a complete tool for his body builder physique. Jasper and I returned to our respective reps, Jasper doing bicep curls and me using some contraption that made my chest as hard as a rock. Marble, really.

"I saw that little exchange, you cocksuckers. Just wait. We'll see who gets more ass with their muscles."

Jasper shook his head and grunted as he pushed himself harder. Fucking pacifist.

"I have a girlfriend, jackass, and so do you. Besides, Edward gets more ass than a toilet seat. And he's not jacked."

Emmett shrugged and forced out another set. I'm not sure why we went to the gym. I mean, obviously Emmett is a fucking nut, but I think Jasper and I just went along because we never really did anything on our own. A security blanket, maybe? No. I don't know. But we never did anything solo and so when Emmett told us he was going to the gym when we were 14, we just went because Emmett was going. It made sense. And ever since then, we've been going to the gym. And then when Jasper told us he was going to take Russian at an after-school language program, Emmett and I just went because Jasper was going.

OK, Jasper and I learned Russian. Emmett hit on the teacher's assistant.

I'm not sure if our parents intended on us being so inseparable, but they lost their sons once the tripod was formed. Nothing had ever come between us and I couldn't imagine anything that could. And then of course, Jasper liked what he saw once Ali started growing up, and she joined our clan. So we were a quad. Then Rosalie fucking Hale decided to sprout tits and an ass and there you go, we had ourselves a little five some.

"Speaking of asses... Edmund, don't you have some pussy to be chasing?"

I rolled my eyes and stood from the machine. Oh, that's right. Isabella Swan. Virgin extraordinaire. I sat down on some other contraption and began working on my calves. I have really nice fucking calves.

"Yeah, I'm getting there. It's Sunday. I can't just pop up at her house. I have to talk to her in class. It's an art form, you know, pussy chasing. You can't rush these things."

"Especially if this chick is a pain in the balls. Seriously, virgin 'till marriage? Christ on a fucking cracker. How does the guy know he wants to marry her without testing her out? Like a car. I wouldn't have gotten my SLK without trying it first."

Jasper's SLK is a nice fucking car. Just looking at it, I would know I didn't need to test the goods. This bitch, however, must not be very attractive if she could keep from getting her cherry popped. I thought about what he said. Fuck me. My mouth isn't the cleanest but sometimes Jasper can make my toes curl. And he's with my baby sister. Fucking figures.

"So then you'll actually go to Bio tomorrow?"

"Oh, yeah. Fuck. I don't even know where my book is. So I'll need yours."

"How do you manage to get straight A's if you don't go to class?"

"I show up for major tests and gets 100's. Like I said, an art form Jasper. Laurie usually hands in a copy of her homework with my name on it in exchange for a little oral, too. "

"It's Lauren. So you're a homework whore."

I thought about it as I straightened, then bent my knees, effectively lifting the weights with my calf muscles. I have really nice fucking calves.

"Yeah. I guess I am. Could be worse. Newton fucked for lunch money once."

A loud clang of metal then a dull thud let me know that Emmett had dropped his barbell and was now on the floor laughing. His guffaws resonated throughout the cement gym and it was causing the rest of the people in there to stare. Fucking figures.

"Listen, boys. You just wait and see how a man does it. I'm going to fuck her so hard she won't remember her own name. She'll be in a wheel chair for the rest of her life, and she'll be begging me for more. Just you wait and see."

Fuck. How the hell was I supposed to know who this Isabella Swan was? Oh, she sits next to me. I looked at the empty seat. Perfect. I decide to actually go to class and the bitch doesn't show. My attention was focused on the table corner I was scratching my name into via broken pen when I felt that a presence beside me. I looked up.

My fucking god, I shouldn't have done that. Why didn't anyone fucking tell me that Isabella Swan, AKA Virgin Extraordinaire, is a sex pot? I was staring, but I couldn't help it. I never knew jeans and a sweatshirt could make me want a girl so badly. Her legs stretched on forever and that waist...so tiny and delicate. And then her chest. My cock twitched. Her tits were perfect. Not too big, not too small, and the sweatshirt didn't hide any of it. I mentally kicked myself in the balls once I realized I had not once looked at her face. Fucking fuck. I shouldn't have done that either.

She was sitting so close. I wanted to touch her, make sure she was real. That heart shaped face, so perfectly innocent and untouched. Her gorgeous lips were so full, oddly uneven but perfect. Her little nose, almost cute, but still angular. And the last thing I saw were her eyes. That was my undoing. They were sort of wide set, huge like she'd seen a fucking ghost, and sparkling. Sparkling like fucking diamonds and I couldn't look away but I wanted to, I did. It was as if she was reaching into my chest and grabbing onto my heart.

When did plain brown eyes become so undeniably entrancing? And since when did Edward fucking Cullen get rendered speechless by a little girl with no makeup or stilettos. But all I wanted to do was run my fingers through her thick, chocolate, no. Not chocolate. Mahogany hair. It shined beneath the florescents and bounced around her slender shoulders with each breath.

And she just sat there, her books open and ready for today's lesson with a pencil resting in the crease of her book. Her arms were folded across her perfect

chest and those gorgeous lips were turned in a pout. Wait, a pout? A scowl. And her brow was furrowed. She was wrinkling her perfect little forehead! I had to say something, make her happy again. I could do that, right?

"Hiyou'rebeautiful!" Shit. "Fuck. I'm sorry."

I rolled my eyes at myself and turned in my seat. No doubt she didn't want to fucking look at me now. What the fuck was I doing? Why was I acting like some poor mother fucker that just got caught jizzing into a gym sock? Beautiful? I had never called a girl beautiful before, really because I never thought they were. My breathing was heavy and I couldn't look at her. I put my elbow up on the table and put my hand up to the side of my face, effectively hiding from her. I tried to calm down my breathing. No cigar. I sounded like I had fucking emphysema while sitting in a smoking lounge. Not good. Get it together, Cullen!

"Um, hi?"

What? I put my hand down and looked up. She spoke. The beautiful, perfect, gorgeous angel graced me with just two words, but regardless, I wanted to fuck her senseless. Rattle her teeth, make her tits bounce higher than her hair line, make sure she can't walk for two weeks. I would win this bet. If not for the money, then for my sanity because I would never stop fantasizing about her. Her eyebrows were now turned up in question and her plump lips were pursed together like she was giving the world a tiny kiss. Jesus Christ, when did I become such a fucking poet? And we locked eyes again. I couldn't help it.

"Isabella Swan. I'm Edward Cullen."

My breath whooshed out of me and I couldn't help but grin the biggest fucking grin she'd ever seen.

"Bella, please, and I know. You're supposed to be my partner, but I always have to do the work myself."

She sighed slightly and shook her head, but she didn't look angry. Maybe, sorry? Did she pity me? She couldn't think I was some lame assed mother fucker with no motivation or dreams, could she? Oh, I had dreams. And she was in them.

"I, uh, I know I should be here more often. I'm sorry you need to do the extra work. I'm going to be here every day from now on. I promise."

And she smiled. My fucking god, she smiled. In that moment I decided I would spend the rest of my life making everything right in her world, because she was my world. And I felt my heart twist and tear and quake in my chest and I just wanted to hold her. I had never felt so empty in my entire life. My arms felt bare and my skin was tingling. I could have cried. I needed to hold her so badly. I needed to feel her against my chest and taste her sweet breath. And I fucking smiled. I couldn't help it. She did things to me I never thought possible. And I had known her for exactly two minutes and six seconds. But she was so perfect. So fucking perfect. The smile left, though, and she looked tortured almost as she fought for words.

"Listen, Edward. I really need to do well in this class because I'm going to need a scholarship for college. So, could you just not come to class? It's easier for me because I can't really deal with your BS. I don't have the time or patience. I hate that I'm sounding like such a..a... I guess a bitch, but I really, really, really, need to do well. And I can't be held back. So please, just don't come. I've heard about you, Edward. I know what your priorities are and frankly, you disgust me."

She just nodded once and then looked forward at the teacher, whatever the fuck his name is. And in that moment, my world came crashing down. She was beating me up but she still sounded too sweet and innocent. Like she was reading a bedtime story to a child with cancer in a hospital, alone on Christmas Eve. What the fuck was I going to do?

**Please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks so much to everybody who reviewed! It made me smile because I had a really shit day. Why is it that boyfriends like to think girls don't have feelings? I wish I knew. **

**Disclaimer: Not mine, all hers.**

**Warnings: He really is a filthy pig. But Bella will clean him up :)**

How the hell had my life come to this? I was just minding my own business, being my usual asshole self, and then BAM. A kick in the balls. Not just a nudge either, oh no. This was a healthy love tap that left me unsure if I'd be able to reproduce. I didn't sleep for the next two nights, I couldn't. Her face was locked into my brain and she was my only thought. Ok, she wasn't my only thought. She was the first, though. The second was, 'How the fuck do I get her to like me?' She is something to be treasured. A diamond among rocks. She's beautiful, perfect. I felt like I had won a prize just being in her presence. Yet, she hated me because I took it upon myself to fuck every girl in our school.

My pencil was resting in the crease of my text and I had my notes, well Laurie's notes, out on my side of the table. I even looked at the chalk board! I was twenty minutes early. Why? Who the fuck knows. Probably because I didn't sleep at all so I had been awake anyway. Might as well get some time to myself before class started, sort out my thoughts.

And then she walked into the room. And I swore I could feel it before I saw it, like an electric current running through my veins. It pumped through me and fueled my heart and all I could see was her. Isabella Swan. The end of my life as I knew it. She was wearing jeans and a tee shirt today. Fuck me.

She came closer, narrowing her too perfect eyes at me once she realized I had dared show up again. Oh, Baby, I wouldn't dare keep away from you. After meeting her, there was no way I could. She came closer still and rounded the corner to our table. Closer, closer, closer still. Oh, come to papa. And then she was gone. Wait, what? My eyes widened in shock and I looked at the ground, where my Isabella was scattered along with her books and pencil. What the hell had she tripped on? It must have been air because we were the only people in the room, it's not like a foot had blocked her path. And there weren't any sticks that just popped out of nowhere. How the hell had she fallen?

I finally came out of my little silent reverie to see she was still haphazardly sprawled on the floor, trying desperately to right herself. No cigar. Her backpack was holding her down and her hair was covering her eyes. That hair. My dick twitched a little. She looked like she had just been thoroughly fucked. Then my little buddy came back and kicked me in the nuts again. He screamed, 'Save her, Cullen!' And so I did.

Rising from my seat, I was next to her in a second. Her scent consumed me. She smelled like strawberries and freesia. Freesia? When the fuck did I become a mother fucking botanist? Regardless, she smelled like heaven. I first picked up her backpack, unwinding it from around her arm and I set it down on our table. While I did so, she managed to sit up and fix her hair. Her fingers ran through the tangled mess with a quiet huff. I almost died.

Once her hair was sorted I could see her face. She was flushed as a fucking tomato and I had never seen such a beautiful sight. It was such a god damn turn on to see her like that. She was so fucking beautiful. Her smoldering chocolate eyes simmered with embarrassment and her face reddened even more once we made eye contact. I still looked like a stupid deer in the head lights. My buddy came back. 'Fucking hell! Pick up her books! She probably hurt herself!' Oh, right.

I leaned down and gathered her books and then put them next to her backpack on the table. How was I fucking this up so badly? My perfect plan of sweeping this girl off her feet was reaching FUBAR point and picked up speed by the second. But I couldn't help that I was so distracted. She was just so beautiful. I wanted to pick her up and hold her in my lap while she cried on my shoulder and begged me to make her better. Because I wanted to. I wanted to so badly. I would have given her the moon if it made her happy again. But I almost didn't want to. If I had made her happy, her plump lips wouldn't be turned down into that fuckable frown she was sporting. My angel righted herself and stood, still blushing furiously. Her eyes stayed down on the ground as she sat in her seat, still huffing.

"Um, are you OK, Isabella?"

She cringed and blushed even harder. Oh, holy hell! If she didn't stop doing that I was going to get a stiffy right there in class, probably jizz in my pants while I was at it.

"Please, stop calling me Isabella. And yes, thanks. I do that often. A lot, actually. Like twice a day."

"Fall on your face?"

She snapped her head in my direction and blasted me with a scrutinizing gaze. I'm so fucking stupid. Why the fuck did I ask her that? I'm such a rude bastard.

"No. I only do that sometimes. I trip, though. On nothing."

"Oh. Well, I'm glad."

She cocked her head to the side slightly and knotted her brow. She looked rather pissed. Did I mention how fucking stupid I am? I smacked myself on the forehead with the hell of my hand. The sound was a lot louder than I expected. I really am stupid.

"No..I..I mean...What I meant to say was I'm glad you don't fall on your face...often...I mean, or at all...I don't want you to fall. It'd be terrible, catastrophic. And I hope it doesn't happen. Are you OK? Are you sure you aren't hurt?"

And she smiled. My fucking god, she smiled. I felt my heart twist and tear and quake in my chest and I just wanted to hold her. I felt so empty just then. My arms felt bare and my skin was tingling. I could have cried. I needed to hold her so badly. I needed to feel her against my chest and taste her sweet breath. All because she had turned her little pout into a precious smile. And I fucking smiled. I couldn't help it. Have you ever felt so completely alone even though someone was sitting right next to you? I do. Because I would never be whole until I had her in my arms forever.

"Why are you smiling?"

She giggled. Fuck. Dick twitch number two.

"Because. You aren't half as charming as they say you are. Actually, not at all as charming. Funny, really. But you are absolutely out of your mind bumbling around without a sense of what you are saying."

Oh, you have no idea. Bella Swan, 1. Edward Cullen, -5. Her voice, oh shit her voice. It was the most beautiful sound in the world. She sounded just as sweet as the day before when she chewed my ass out for not coming to class. Well, here I am. Chew me up, spit me out, throw me away, I don't care. Just touch me. And then the bell rang. Fuck. Kids started piling in and class had begun.

I spent the rest of class just trying to touch her. I would put my hand next to hers, hoping I could just inch it over without noticing. But each time I did something like that, she'd shift in her chair or run her fingers through those mahogany tundrels. Each time she did it I got another dose of her scent. It smacked me in the face in waves of pure heaven. Shit. Poetry again. Can you tell she had me by the balls? Oh fuck. How I wish.

The bell finally rang and I decided I needed to make a move. She'd smiled at me earlier. She can't totally hate me, right? She began to gather her things.

"Bella."

"Edward."

"Bella."

"Edward."

I grinned. Sassy little thing.

"I really would like to see you outside of class."

"Hnh."

Hnh? What the fuck does that mean? RECOVER, CULLEN!

"Not in a weird way like a date or something. I..uh...I need extra help. Since I haven't been here enough I think I'm behind. Could you tutor me? Please? Just after school or something."

She stopped putting away her things. She looked pensive. Pensive? Yeah, that works. Her lips pursed again like she was kissing something and she furrowed her sexy eyebrows again. Oh yes, eye brows can be sexy. Maybe we could meet in the library?

"Fine. Who's house?"

House? Last time somebody asked me that I was halfway through a box of condoms and my pants were around my ankles.

"Um, well mine I guess. I could take you home with me and then drive you back here to get your car?"

Again, the kissing face. Please use those lips on me. I'd make it worth your while. I bet she does sinful things with those lips. Sinful, no. She's the Virgin Mary. I bet she could do sinful things with them though, things that would make me beg for mercy. Or for more. I've been known to do both.

"When would you like to meet? We have a test on Thursday, so tomorrow would be best. Or else you'll probably fail."

No. I wouldn't fail. I could take it without a pencil or a hand to write with and I'd still get an A. But I'm not telling her that.

"Perfect."

"OK. Well, I won't be in class tomorrow because I have a meeting with my guidance councilor so we'll have to agree on a meeting place now. Say, the cafeteria after the bell rings?"

"Perfect."

"You said that already."

Because you are.

"Uh, then great. Great meeting place."

She shook her head at me. I'm such a fucking moron.

"OK. See you tomorrow, Edward."

And she was gone. And I was hard as a fucking rock. After a few minutes of regaining composure, and enduring a few glares from the kid that was trying to sit in his seat for his next class, I stood up and walked out. Alice was waiting for me by the door as usual.

"I don't like it, Edward."

"What?"

"This bet. It's wrong."

Fuck. I forgot this started with $200. It wasn't even about that anymore. I was head over heels for this girl and I hadn't even touched her yet. Could I let Alice know? No. Then she'd tell Jasper, who would tell Emmett, who would tell Rosalie, and I'd never live it down. I'd be ruined for the rest of my life. We continued down the hall. Jasper, Alice, Emmett, and I all had a free period so we sat in the parking lot at our cars. Rosalie skipped gym because she doesn't like to sweat. Out of the bedroom, anyway.

"You put your money in, too, Ali. Just like all of us."

"It's wrong and you know it."

"What's wrong, baby?"

Jasper grabbed Alice and sucked her lips off just as we got to our cars. Emmett was copying down Rosalie's math homework and I parked my ass on the hood of my Volvo. Jasper let Alice up for air.

"The bet. It's wrong. She's a nice girl and Edward will ruin her."

"Nah. It's just a little fun. It's not like she doesn't love Edward already."

Actually, it's quite the opposite. I just grinned and nodded, hopefully convincing them that this was still just a bet. I'd never fucking live it down if they found out how hard I'd fallen in two days.

"Well, I'm out. You can count me out. I don't want anything to do with this. It's going to be bad, I just know it. I can feel it."

Alice's voice started to hold the promise of tears and she shook her head furiously. Fuck, she felt strongly about this. Emmett sighed and closed his book, handing Rosalie her copy of the homework.

"Alice, listen, Captain Asshole over here will bend her and get it over with. She'll be officially popped and will go to college with a proper high school education."

He shrugged and held up his hands, tying to calm her down. She just shook her head harder and I thought I saw a tear fall. My sweet Alice.

"Alice, I won't hurt her. It'll be ok."

I could never hurt her. She means more to me than my whole life. I'd die for just one taste of her sweet, unevenly plump lips. Fuck, Alice.

"No. This needs to stop."

I looked to Jasper.

"I'm out then. It'll be OK, babe."

I looked to Emmett. He shrugged and sighed.

"Mother fucker. I'm out."

Rosalie. Fucking cunt.

"No way. I'm still in. Fuck the little bitch and you can claim your $50, Edward. You're not pussying out on this."

"Blow me, Rosalie."

"No. You do this or you will be ruined. Finished. Do you understand me? Ruined, Edward fucking Cullen. Remember what this is. Just another two-cent ho' you can throw out when you're done."

Did I ever mention how much I hate this bitch? And I knew she wasn't kidding.

"Seriously, you're going to threaten me?"

I growled at her through clenched teeth and I had to work to keep my fists from flying.

"Why Edward, do you love her? Hm? Is she 'special'? I thought you were the kind of Forks pussy. Now you're just the Prince of pussy-whipped?"

I sighed and shook my head, pinching the bridge of my nose. I looked like my father whenever I do it but I can't help it. It just happens. Her voice was dripping with just pure nastiness and hate.

"And what will you do to ruin me? Hm? Say I'm a bad lay?"

"No. Nobody would believe that I touched your dick. I'll just tell everyone you knocked up my cousin and now you're a proud Papa."

"Emmett, control your woman."

"Edward. You fuck her or start shopping for diapers."

And that is why I am forever under the control of Rosalie. Why do we put up with her? Because she's Jasper's sister and Emmett loves her. I don't know how. She's ruthless. What the fuck did she care about what I did with Bella? OK, I know why she cares. Last year when we were drunk on my birthday she wanted to fuck me. She was on a break with Emmett. The two fight like pit bulls. I said no and pushed her off of my bed. She asked me why and I said I wasn't attracted to her. That's why she hates me. We were drunk but she held onto that like I just slaughtered her family. She's been torturing me ever since and I don't know if it will ever end. Probably not. She's a bitch like that. Emmett even tried to convince her to let it go. She ignores him.

But I didn't care, because I would get to be tutored by Bella Swan after school. She'd be in my room and I'd have her in my presence for more than forty-five minutes. Dick twitch number 4.

**Isn't nervous Edward adorable? I think he is. Please review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you Entertainme for my only review. Do you not like it? I mean, if you don't, please just tell me. It's worse to not get any feedback.**

Today's the fucking day, the day I get to bask in the presence of my angel. I didn't bother going to Biology. Nobody would miss me and sitting there without her would have been hell. It'd be like sending an Ethiopian into an empty grocery store with a shopping cart. Just fucking cruel. But not as cruel as the agony I was in while waiting for her. My beautiful, perfect, glorious Bella. Fuck. I had been in the cafeteria since eleven o'clock. We were meeting at two. I rehearsed my lines like a sorry bastard and made sure I wouldn't fuck up like I had the last time we spoke. I wouldn't look like a dick, I refused. The second hand ticked away and finally, the bell rang. Shit, I needed more time to prepare. Now or never.

And right on time, she walked through the doors, her head down as she read her book. It was tattered and had Post-It notes sticking out of the sides. She stood in the entrance. 'Go, Cullen! Go!' Thanks, little buddy. I'll do that.

I was finally close enough. My memory hadn't done her any justice. She looked even more beautiful today. Her perfectly brown hair was away from her face in an elastic, but only the top half so the rest flooded her shoulders. I groaned. She looked up. Fuck, she heard me. Her eyes met mine and I got that feeling again. The one that I got the first day we met. An electric current shot through my bloodstream and jolted my cold heart. It seemed like it hadn't been beating until I saw her again. I was officially addicted.

"Hello, Edward. I'm surprised you actually showed up."

"Why? You think I'd bail on you?"

"You have been, technically, everyday at eight am."

I sighed. Yeah, I'm a really mother fucker.

"I know. But like I said, I'm going to be here every single day and I will show up for our tutoring sessions."

She looked at my skeptically with that kiss face again. Her brow furrowed and her lips were pursed slightly. Why does she do this to me? Does she want me to bust a load right here and now?

"There is no reason why I should trust you and frankly, I'm only doing this so you can be helpful when we do our labs. Otherwise I wouldn't really care if you failed or not."

I wouldn't have failed. She turned and walked out the door, expecting me to follow. How the hell can she be so mean but still sound like the sweetest fucking thing I'd ever heard? Her voice. Just pure music and smooth as velvet. Oh yeah, and she hates me, too. I followed her out the door and met her at my car. I pressed the button to unlock it and put my bag in the trunk. By the time I made it into my seat she was already buckled in and tapping her foot impatiently. What the fuck? She was so calm the other day. Maybe it was that time of the month. They get pissy around then, right? I pulled out and began the drive back to my house.

"Bella, can I ask you something?"

"You just did."

I snapped my head in her direction, shocked. She just grinned. Fuck, so she wasn't a complete bitch. She had a sense of humor. Hot as fucking hell. I cleared my throat.

"Um, Bella. You're a really, really nice girl. I know you are. But, why are you being so um...hostile?"

She sighed and played with the ends of her hair before answering me.

"Because, Edward, guys like you are the reason most girls aren't 'nice' like me. You've hurt some of my good friends and I see the way you hurt Lauren every single day. Not that I mind, I mean, she's a total slut. Still, you don't deserve my respect."

Her voice was laced with such pitty. She honestly felt sorry for me, like she had just told me I had a terminal illness. But she hated me at the same time. I didn't understand. I wish I did, but I just couldn't believe that she would feel sorry for me rather than take a fist to my face. I had to convince her that she was my sun and my only fucking reason for breathing. Alright, so I wouldn't come on too strong yet. And will somebody please tell me who the fuck this Lauren is?

"Well. I won't lie and tell you I haven't been a prick before. I may not always do the right thing, Bella, but just let me show you that that's not me. I'm a lot of things, Bella, but I promise I can be better."

I am the saddest mother fucker in the world. I really am. How pathetic. I'm practically groveling here, begging her to open her eyes and accept me and she just looks out the window. Fucking pitiful. She didn't say anything after that.

We finally got to my house. I planned on opening her door for her but she was out before I even had my seatbelt off. Definitely not making it easy for me. We entered the house and I took her into the dining room. Both of my parents were at the hospital working and my siblings were at the mall. Perfect. We'd be alone. Not that we'd need alone time. She hated me so a quiet house to fuck in wouldn't be necessary. I set down my books and took her coat from her.

"You have a beautiful home, Edward."

I blushed, like a little fucking girl. My parents make way too much money and I can't stand the lavish lifestyle. OK, so I don't complain when they give me money but our house truly is ridiculous.

"Thank you. I will be sure to tell my mother you think so. She'd get a kick out of it. Can I get you anything to eat or drink?"

"Water would be wonderful, thank you."

So fucking polite. So fucking perfect. I went to the kitchen. My hands went to the counter and I hung my head. I felt like I was going to vomit. Isabella Swan was in my house and waiting for me. I couldn't take it. The excitement was making me jittery yet my nerves made me queezy. I can't fucking believe how nervous she makes me. But I like it all at the same time. I'd rather her drive me crazy than evoke no feeling in my at all. To not be effected by her presence would be devastating. She moved me and I fucking liked it. After regaining my composure, I walked into the dining room with what I hoped was a calm face. My heart was running a marathon.

I sat down across from her and handed her water, watching as she set up our text books and study guides so that she could help me. Her eyelashes were miles long and curved up in a perfect arch. They were so thick and dense, like she was wearing an entire tube of mascara. But really she wasn't wearing any makeup. Her cheeks had a natural and sexy reddish tint to them that matches her lips. I groaned quietly.

Those lips. She was biting down on the full bottom one with her two front teeth, tugging and sucking on it while she was busy with our books. It made me want things I should never want, should never expect of her. And just the contrast of her perfectly white teeth against her blush lips was enough to make me wet myself. She looked up at me with those big brown eyes and held onto my green ones. Fuck. She caught me staring like a love sick puppy.

I quickly looked down at the table and traced a line in the wood with my finger. I can't believe she caught me. I heard her clear her little throat.

"Um, OK. So we should start with the cell division. Do you know anything about that?"

Of course I know about cell division. 'Play dumb! She's supposed to be teaching you!'

"No. Could you explain it?"

I must have sounded like such a stupid bastard. Who the fuck doesn't know about cell division? Apparently we had the same train of thought because she huffed. Her breath wafted to my nose and I almost passed out. It was so sweet and inviting. I wanted to kiss her, taste her, feel her. It couldn't happen but I never wanted anything more in my entire life. She was so, so close. If I just leaned forward five inches, we'd be touching. And I would die a happy man after she beat the shit out of me. This was going to be a rough afternoon.

We played our little game for two more hours. She'd ask me a question and then I would pretend I didn't know what she was talking about. I was getting witty, too. I once asked her if she was speaking Chinese. Pretty fucking genius, right?

"OK, so do you understand it now?"

"Yeah. You're a really good teacher."

I also had this down pat before I even opened my book.

"Well, maybe you're just a good student then?"

I chuckled a bit and shook my head. Oh Bella, the only thing I've been studying is your anatomy. She smiled at me for the third time and I almost lost my shit. She is so fucking beautiful. I found myself lost in her big brown eyes once again. We held eye contact, our breathing the only sound in the room.

And then it all got ruined. I heard gravel crunching in the driveway, followed by doors slamming and laughter. Big, huge, booming laughter and a few tinkles of a giggle. Fuck. Alice was home and she brought Emmett and Jasper with her. Well, of course she did. They practically lived at our house, anyway. Bella heard it just as I did and she looked up, curious. Our perfect afternoon of Bella thinking I didn't know anything about Biology was ruined.

The front door opened. Alice bounced in, how she could bounce in five-inch heels I wasn't sure, and put down her purse. Jasper and Emmett followed but each were carrying a dozen shopping bags that looked ready to burst. It must have been a good day for Alice. I really love my sister. She's a good person with a bit of a wicked curiosity that just makes her intriguing. Kind of like a pixie. Sweet and little, but they pack a mean punch. I really fucking love her. However, she is related to me at a really inconvenient time.

"Eduardo, come get a fucking bag. I can't even see where I'm walking. If you left your shoes in the door way again, I'll snap your little neck."

I stood and went over to Emmett, helping him sort out the bags so that he could see. Jasper had deposited his share on the floor by the stairway and went to the closet. I sucked in a breath. His hand went straight for the brown corduroy jacket that smelled like sweet freesia and strawberries. Heaven. I forgot to tell them she would be over.

"Who the fuck does this belong to? Edmund, this yours? A little small, eh? And it smells so...so...pretty. Were you rolling around with Lauren again in her Suburban?"

Fucking fuck. He has to bring up Laurie in front of Bella? Perfect. Just perfect. My life is officially over. I strode over in three fast steps and tore the jacket from his grasp. He looked at me like I had three fucking heads. I take it back when I said I liked Jasper. I lied. I fucking hate him.

"No, you piece of shit. It's Bella's."

"Who the fuck is Bella?"

How could he not know of the perfect angel? The most pure form of heaven on earth and he has no idea who she is?

"Isabella Swan is my Biology partner. She's helping me study for my test tomorrow."

I looked over at her then. She was bright as a fucking tomato and she was looking down at the table. No doubt because of Jasper. Asshole. I wanted to go over and hug her, rock her and kiss her and make her feel better, take away her embarrassment. Then she really might think I'm nuts. 'Hold it together, Cullen!' Such a good bastard. Always has my back. I cleared my throat and walked back over to the table, taking my seat across from her. My Bella. She hadn't looked up yet. Realization flashed across Jasper's face. Yes, you bastard. This Bella. Before either of us could speak again, Alice was at the table in a flash, taking the seat next to Bella. Her tiny arms were thrown around my poor beauty and she was squeezing her within an inch of her life.

"Bella! So wonderful to meet you. I'm so glad you and I are going to be friends!"

Bella's eyes were so wide I thought her eyeballs were going to fall out of her head. She looked like she could pass out. Alice tends to make that first impression count.

"We are?"

"Oh, yes! Best friends. I just know it. I can feel it, too."

My beautiful Bella looked over at me then, silently pleading for help. Of course I will save you! I rolled my eyes for effect and pried Alice's fingers from around Bella's shoulders. She looked defeated but nevertheless, she sprang up from her seat perfectly happy. Bella looked slightly relieved but her face was still bright red. My heart ached at the sight. How could I help her? How would I make her feel comfortable again? She actually laughed when we were studying! Fucking Jasper. Fucking Alice. Fucking Emmett. Oh shit. Emmett. I looked over at the door where Emmett was still standing. If she was afraid of Alice, no doubt he'd scare the shit out of her.

There he stood, grinning like some moron on Christmas day. His arms were crossed and I had never seen him smile so big. What the fuck? Thank fucking god he stayed where he was. That god damn electric current she brought with her was still running through me. I fucking hate myself.

"Bella. I'm Emmett. And we'll probably be best friends. I just know it. I can feel it, too. It's a tingling in my groin, kind of like when I'm just about to cu-"

"EMMETT! Kitchen. Now."

I snarled at him like a fucking dog. I didn't care. I wanted to tear him apart. I was seething. I stood up and went with him. He was still grinning the Cheshire Cat once we were in the safety of the kitchen.

"What the fuck is your problem, ass wipe? Are you really that much of a fucking douche?"

He laughed and the sound resonated off the marble countertops. His massive paw clamped down on my shoulder and he fought to catch his breath. Sometimes I'm still shocked at how big the fucker is. His shoulders dwarf mine and he's a good two or three inches taller than I am. And he has a huge head. Like, enormous.

"Oh, oh Eddie. I wish you could have seen yourself in there."

He laughed even harder. I reached for a knife out of the wooden block on the counter. I would slaughter this mother fucker for speaking to my Bella that way.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

I growled again. I'm just an animal, what can I say.

"You...you... Oh, Ed. You're so fucking in love, it's not even funny. Actually, it's pretty fucking hilarious. Head over heels, whipped like a mother fucker."

"It's true."

Great, now Jasper was in on the action. That meant my Bella was out with Alice. Oh fuck.

"Listen, I'm not in love with her. It's a bet."

Keep cool.

"Oh no, not anymore, Sex Ed. You're in it for the long haul."

How the fuck could I hide anything from these fools? I couldn't. I'd known them too damn long. And I needed them too much. They're my best friends. How can you breathe without your best friends' approval? They're something else. I can't explain it. It's just, I know that if I didn't have them I'd be lost. Sounds kind of gay, but I can't help it. Fuck. I need to go retrieve my balls now, excuse me for a moment.

"It's bad guys. It's fucking bad."

My words whooshed out with one breath. I started hyperventilating and Emmett was laughing again. I paced the vast expanse of marble floor in circles with my forefinger and thumb pinching the bridge of my nose. What the fuck was wrong with me? I'd never felt like this in my entire life! I didn't know what to do.

"I knew it. I fucking knew it, you little cocksucker."

Emmett laughed again and had to hold onto the counter top to keep from falling over.

"Emmett, shut up. Listen, Edward. It's cool, man. This happens. But that's good. People usually don't complain when they fall in love."

I stopped pacing.

"I'm Edward fucking Cullen! I can't be in love!"

I whisper yelled the last part. No need for Bella to be knowing that I'm obsessed with her to the point where I should be institutionalized. I felt like ripping the hair out of my head. I was beyond frustrated. I had no idea what to do with these feelings. Jasper sighed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"It's all good. Just relax. Take a breath. Now, how do you know you like her? I use the word like because I'm still not quite sure if you're capable of loving a girl."

I lifted myself onto the counter of the center island and sighed. There were too many reasons. For starters, she's so fucking beautiful it hurts to look at her. But then when I don't I feel suffocated.

"She's just too beautiful. Too perfect, too...good. She's everything that's right and nothing that's wrong. I just can't be without her. Or I think I'll just...collapse."

Emmett looked skeptical.

"I haven't had sex in two days, since I met her for the first time."

I looked up from the floor at my two cohorts. Well, Einsteins? Anything? They looked at each other and held eye contact for a moment, contemplating. Move over, Dr. Phil. The Tripod could take your job. We're better looking, too. Emmett looked at me first and nodded once, his arms folded over his massive torso. He works out too much. Fucking gross.

"Yup. You're in deep, Edwin."

"Can't you just call me Edward?"

"So this is definitely not about a bet anymore?"

"Bet? No! I just told you she's the reason for my existence and you ask if it's still about a bet? Jesus, Jasper. Are you that dense?"

"Alright, alright. Relax. I'm just making sure. Because if you're going to do this, it has to be done right. You need to romance her. Make her want you back because you won't really be alive until you do. I can assure you."

No shit, blondie. Such a fucking romantic. I guess that's good. Then I know he really loves Alice. He's always right. Damn it.

"I know. I want to. I'm trying. We were doing fucking fantastic until you three dipshits show up. Just fucking perfect."

I hopped down from the counter and ran my fingers through my hair. I need a hair cut. It's too long. But then if I get it cut too short I can't dramatically run my hands through it while sighing. I have a tough life.

"So? Now what?"

"Now, we go retrieve her from the clutches of Alice."

Right. Easier said than done. We exited the kitchen at the same time, only to find the dining room table empty. Our books were still there but my angel was gone.

"Fuck."

I sprinted upstairs, my boys hot on my heels. What the fuck was my sister doing to poor Bella? We rounded the top of the stair case and sprinted down the hall, skidding to a stop infront of Alice's door. Fuck. Here we go.

"Oh no! Alice!"

Bella was sitting at Alice's vanity with Alice going to town on her hair.

"Oh, hush, Edward! She has great hair!"

"Yes, it's beautiful. Leave it alone."

I blushed at my sudden words. Why did I say that? Do I not have any fucking control over myself anymore? No. I don't.

"Bella, I should take you home now."

"Oh, but what about my truck?"

Fuck. Details.

"It's kind of dark already so I was thinking I'd just pick you up for school tomorrow. If that's alright?"

"Sure. Whatever."

So carefree and sexy. My life will never be the same, will it?

**So Edward finally got his shit together and admitted his feelings! So cute! I actually like him in this. I know it's kind of slow coming but they will talk more soon, I promise! Please review. I don't want to waste time if nobody wants to read the story. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Wow! Thanks for the reviews. I don't like to ask for them but I just need feedback. So I will keep writing this because obviously there are a few of you that would like me to continue. And how can I deny you after your overly kind words? Some of you mentioned the humor in the past chapters. I think this story is funny. We never really see an Edward that can't win Bella over right away so that to me is funny right there. Then throw in Emmett and Jasper and the 'Tripod's fratboy nature? It's gold. Haha my favorite line from last chapter: **

**"Bella. I'm Emmett. And we'll probably be best friends. I just know it. I can feel it, too. It's a tingling in my groin, kind of like when I'm just about to cu-"**

**"EMMETT! Kitchen. Now."**

**Definitely my favorite. Emmett is so much fun to write. Enjoy!**

"I, uh...I'm sorry about Alice and your hair yesterday. She's something else."

"Oh, no. She's fine. I really like her, actually. We had fun."

My voice was shaky and unsure. When the fuck had I even been unsure of myself? Oh yeah, when I'm around the most wonderful form of perfection here on earth. My Bella. Having her in my car again was like a dream come true. Her scent was everywhere and I couldn't help but breathe through my nose so I could take her in.

Everything about her was just too much. The way her hair flowed around her face from the gentle wind coming out of the air vents in my dashboard. My fingers itched to touch it, to touch her in some way. I had yet to feel her skin but I could only imagine how soft and silky it must be. I actually had a wet dream about it the previous night. Like a mother fucking kid, I jizzed in my pajama pants at the thought of touching Isabella Swan. And it wasn't even like I could see her tits or anything. It was her fucking hand. I was holding her mother fucking hand in the dream. I'm such a pathetic excuse for a man, I really am.

My palms were so slick with sweat that I could barely keep a good grip on the steering wheel of my Volvo. Fuck. The things she does to me. Alice had given me a pep talk before I left the house. Apparently, this is the moment? If I don't make a break through now, I might as well just give up. Mother fucker. I couldn't even breathe right in her presence and I'm supposed to strike up a conversation? I looked over at her. She had on a pair of jeans and a sweater with a little v-neck. It exposed a creamy sliver of her gorgeous chest. Just the perfect swell that appeared where her neck meets her breast bone. Her skin was like alabaster, so flawless and angelic. She's so fucking beautiful. And I can't get her out of my head.

"I'm definitely ready for the Biology test. I studied a lot last night."

No, I hadn't. I didn't even bring my shit with me today.

"Good. You really are smart, Edward. You understood everything quickly when I explained it. You should just try harder."

Oh, I'll try harder. If it means I can be next to you. 'Talk about something other than school, douche bag!' Oh, shit. Yeah. Thanks, man.

"Bella, can I ask you a more um, personal question?"

She shifted nervously in her seat for a second. Her bottom lip was immediately sucked into her hot little mouth and her top front teeth bit down on it gently. My dick twitched.

"Don't worry, I'm not looking for your social security number. I just um, want to know more about you. If that's OK."

She looked over at me and made that kissy face. You know, the one where she looks like she's giving the air a tiny kiss while she squints her eyes a little and makes her sexy eye brows furrow together. I felt a stiffy coming on. She just nodded. Great, now what the fuck do I ask her?

"So, what do you like to do for fun?"

That's a good question, right? Simple, harmless. And I honestly wanted to know. I wanted to know what made her happy, sad, laugh, cry. I wanted to know what brand of toothpaste she used, what color her bedroom was. Everything, or anything. Just give me something.

"I really like to read. Classics mostly. Right now I'm rereading Wuthering Heights for the tenth time. It's my favorite."

I snapped my head in her direction. She what? Of course she has to be fucking smart. It's not enough that she torments my sex drive with her perfectly shaped hips and ass. That tiny waist, perky tits. She has to go and be intellectual? I don't think I'm cut out for this. I can't handle it. She makes me crazy. I was tempted to pull over to the side of the road and ruin her for all other men. By the time I was done with her, she'd never be able to look at another guy the same. They just couldn't adore her as much as I did. She's so perfect.

"Classics, huh? Any Shakespeare?"

"Um, yeah. I don't read it as often as I should. I like to listen to it more than I like to read it."

Time to make your move, Cullen. Here it goes. It's now or never. I just can't hold it in anymore. I need to advance. This whole taking it slow thing doesn't work for me. The bulge in my pants grows every time I look at her. How much longer can I keep up with this?

"Tis torture, and not mercy. Heaven is here Where Juliet lives, and every cat and dog And little mouse, every unworthy thing, Live here in heaven and may look on her, But Romeo may not."

Fuck. That's too forward. I sucked in a breath and stared straight ahead at the road with a clenched jaw. I messed up. I couldn't look at her. I gripped the steering wheel harder and pressed on the gas pedal. My heart was racing. How did I let myself say that? How could I? What the fuck ever happened to self-preservation? Isn't that shit natural? Shouldn't my mind protect itself from my asshole tendencies? One would think. I am sick, a really masochist. Why do I put myself through this shit? Alright, grow a set of balls and look at her, Cullen. Just do it. She's probably thinking you are the biggest loser. Get it over with. And I did.

My breath caught in my throat and I almost drove off the road. She was fucking smiling. Not just a smirk, but a beautiful, gorgeous grin that spread her full lips across her adorable face from ear to ear. It reached her brown doe eyes and they sparkled. They fucking sparkled and I almost passed out. She really took my breath away. If I spent the rest of my days doing one thing it would be looking at her smile. It made my stomach get all squishy and it felt like a boxing match in my chest. I was losing, bad.

"Why are you smiling? You must think I'm such a fucking loser. I am, I really am. I'll just stop talking now."

I looked back at the road. She giggled. It was the sweetest sound I had ever heard, even sweeter than her normal voice. How had I gone so far in life without having her by my side all the time? What is wrong with me?

"No, Edward. I'm smiling because I can't believe you know Shakespeare. It was beautiful. And like I said, I like to listen to it more than I like to read it. You recite it wonderfully. Don't worry, Edward. I'm not complaining."

My Bella. She is too good for me. But I was so fucking relieved. She's so perfect. I can't take it anymore. I sighed and smiled. Today was going to be a long day. We wouldn't be sitting next to each other in Biology because we always got spread out for tests. I had to see her still.

"Do you think maybe you'd like to go out to lunch with me today? I mean, it's a half day and so we don't get lunch at school and we're going to be-"

"Sure."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

So fucking nonchalant. I just practically admit how much I want to bone her, Ok, not quite, but she just accepts it like I asked her if she thought the sky was blue. She's so sexy. She has that confidence, like she knows what kind of a pitiful moron I am and she knows she's just too fucking good for me. She knows how perfect she is and she like it. But god damn, so do I.

"So what food do you like?"

"I don't know. Nothing too adventurous. I'm kind of boring when it comes to food."

"You're perfect."

I did it again. Son of a bitch. I'm a real bastard. I felt all of my blood rush to my face and I snapped my attention back to the road. Please tell me she didn't hear that. I have real verbal diarrhea when it comes to this girl. I can't help it! She makes me feel these feelings, and I can't control them.

"Um, thanks."

We didn't talk for the rest of the ride. I made her uncomfortable. How did I manage to do that in only ten minutes? I'm a loser, that's why.

**Ok, so I wanted to get this out becuase I want to try and update everyday for this story and I'm sorry if it's short. If I pushed out any more than this it would have been rushed because I'm in the middle of a huge project at work. Thanks again for the reviews and keep them coming! I'd really like to hear your favorite lines. They make me smile :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks for the reviews! I feel so loved! That chapter was so short and yet you still liked it. I was on a high today, thinking about this story and I'm pretty excited for it. So some of you think you have it all figured out...and I like that you're trying to figure out where it's going. But if there's one thing you should know, it's that my stories and my imagination rarely go the way people expect them to :) **

I couldn't see her because she was put in the back corner of the room, but I could feel her. I felt her like a fucking earthquake. She rocked my world and I fucking loved it. I came in late to class so I didn't really have time to scan the room before I took my seat right next to the door. I relieved the tension in my neck so I could focus on the test and it hit me the second my shoulders sagged. Like a fucking tsunami wave, her presence pile drove into me. I shuddered briefly and smiled to myself. Isabella Swan, you shake me. My hand shook as I brought my pen to the paper. She's too much for me and I didn't even lay my eyes on her. Go help me if I had. I'm such a pathetic bastard, I really am.

The stupid Biology test was even easier than I expected. He practically handed the answers to us, fucking moron. 'If prophase, metaphase, and anaphase have already taken place, what phase has yet to be completed?' Really? An insult to my fucking intelligence. And he had the mother fucking balls to write at the end of the question, 'A one word answer is fine, you do not need to elaborate.' I don't need to elaborate? So you'll just give me ten points for having a fucking brain? Fucking figures. Just like any pathetic bastard with shit for brains can get at least a six-hundred on the mother fucking SAT as long as they fill in the stupid bubbles for their name. Fucking pathetic.

No wonder complete assholes run everything. Apparently my Biology teacher is one of them because the cocksucker can't even ask us to think for ourselves. Whatthefuckever. At least I got to be in the same room as Bella. Separating for tests is bullshit. It's not like either of us needs to cheat off the other. I fucking missed her, so much. Only two more classes and we'd be out to lunch together. My dick twitched a little as I thought about it while waiting in my car for her. We'd be out, together. Eating lunch. I'd get to be with her for at least an hour. An entire glorious hour. My dick twitched again and I groaned. Good thing nobody can fucking hear me. I had the music playing so loud I could barely hear myself breathe.

Finally, she was out of the door and at my car, getting in and closing the door. Holy hell. She smelled even better than I remembered, sweeter and stronger. Maybe she used more conditioner this morning, how the fuck should I know. But still. She smelled so fucking good. Her hair was down again, it's always down, and she had on a blue long sleeved shirt that had buttons on it. Underneath she had another shirt on. It was white, with little lace flowers on it. Girls layer shit like that. I guess because the blue shirt on top was so low cut. I don't know. I just wear whatever is clean and next to my bed. But she looked fucking amazing. The blue made her creamy skin look even more flawless and pale. So beautiful. She is so fucking beautiful it makes my head hurt.

I can't wrap my mind around her perfection and I don't suspect I ever will. And she's wearing those jeans again. They're tight as hell, like she painted them on, and they're low rise. So they hit just at her hips. That means there's always a sliver of her stomach exposed. I fucking love those jeans. I reached over and turned down the music, smiling a little as I looked over at her.

"Hey."

"You didn't have to turn the music down. Claire De Lune is great."

My fucking heart stopped. Did she just say what I think she just said? Holy hell.

"You know Debussy?"

"Um, only my favorites. But Claire De Lune is one of them."

I grinned like an idiot. She just got more perfect, as impossible as it was. There's no way I'll be able to shake this, this feeling. I feel complete for the first time today and it's because she's sitting next to me. And now that she is, the electric current she brought with her was stronger than a hurricane. I fucking liked it. She looked slightly confused but shook it off. I'm such a fucking moron. She knows that by now and she just moves on. Smart girl.

"Well, did you have something in mind, Edward?"

"Um, I was thinking this little place I know a few towns over. It's Mexican. Is that OK?"

"Mexican is my favorite. That'd be awesome."

Awesome. I'd chosen an awesome restaurant. I smiled again, grinned really. Like an idiot. I do that too much. And she looked at me funny again, with one sexy little brow raised and a small smirk on her plump, fuckable lips. No. I'd never fuck her. She doesn't deserve that. I'd worship her. I'd devour each inch of her skin with soft kisses then I'd take her gently and slowly. She deserves at least that much.

We were seated quickly as we were the only school in the area to have a half day. The place was empty, except for a few business men from an office near by. Perfect. So we could actually enjoy each other's company. Well, I'd enjoy her company. Fuck. I still couldn't accept that she had agreed to go out to lunch with me. She's too perfect and I'm too bad. I'm just not worth her time but she somehow found it in her heart to go out with me. Our first date.

"What do you usually get here?"

"Tacos. Fish tacos. They're really good."

"Fish tacos it is, then."

"Make that two, please."

I looked up at the waitress, who was staring back at me with an open mouth. I know, I can't believe Bella Swan is out with me, either. Fucking crazy, isn't it? She was just as dumbfounded as I was. Oh trust me, everyone else thinks this is nuts, too. The waitress left to go get us our drinks.

"Edward, you almost gave the girl a heart attack."

"Hnh?"

"That girl. She almost fell over when she saw you."

"What are you talking about? She wasn't even paying attention to me."

"She was practically drooling."

I just shook my head. I had no idea what the fuck she was talking about. She was just surprised that Bella had agreed to go out with me. We were such an uneven match. Bella is perfect. Smart, beautiful beyond words, charming. I'm...I'm...one lucky bastard with an over active sex drive and good luck when it comes to finding easy girls. But not anymore. I only wanted one and she was sitting right in front of me.

"So, Bella, tell me about your family. If you don't mind."

The waitress deposited our sodas in front of us and hurried away. She must think I kidnapped Bella. I took a sip of my Coke and watched as Bella did the same. The way her lips wrapped around the straw made me shudder. Those lips. The things I wanted her to do with those lips.

"No, it's fine. Um, well my Dad is the police chief of Forks. But you knew that. And I'm an only child, so no brothers or sisters."

"What about your mom?"

She looked down then at her soda, playing with her straw by jabbing at the ice floating at the top of the liquid. Fuck. I struck a nerve. I'm so fucking stupid. I really hate myself. I don't deserve to live.

"Bella, I'm sorry. Don't answer that. I'm an idiot. just, forget I said anything."

"No, no. It's OK. Um, Renee lives with her husband in Jacksonville. They moved there from Phoenix, where I'm originally from, in August of last year."

"When did you move from Phoenix?"

She looked up then, her deep brown eyes startlingly expressive and open, like she was giving me her soul. I felt guilty for looking into them, like I was taking so much from her.

"Last year was my first school year here. I moved in with Charlie right after Renee and Phil got married."

Her voice sounded sad. Distant. Like she didn't want to say it out loud because of the way it sounded. Did she hate living here? It was probably me.

"Is that OK? I mean, that you moved here?"

She just nodded and looked down at her soda again as she continued her attack on the ice cubes.

"It is what it is. I'm fine. Forks is a good school. I have friends. I get good grades. Kinda just worked out alright I guess."

I was ashamed of myself for not knowing who her friends were. I had no idea who she even was until the stupid bet. I just nodded in agreement and we sat in silence for a minute until our food came. It was awkward sitting there, eating without a sound, but it felt so comfortable. She just made me so happy without even trying.

"Edward, have you been here your whole life?"

"From day one. It kind of sucks, though."

"Why do you say that? Forks is a good school."

"Academically. But the music program is pure shit."

She smiled and nodded, taking another bite of her last taco. I had finished. They're so fucking good. They have some sauce on them that isn't like regular taco seasoning. It's kind of limey and creamy at the same time. Fucking delicious.

"I've heard the band at holiday assemblies. They're pretty terrible. What instrument do you play?"

"Piano."

She smiled, a whole hearted smile. Her beautiful mouth stretched wide across her perfect shape and she made my heart skip a beat. She's killing me and she doesn't even know it. My breath hitched in my throat and I took a sip of my soda to hide it. She's so beautiful.

"That's surprising. I didn't think you had such a..a..civilized hobby. Do you plan to do anything with it in the future?"

A civilized hobby? Oh, you mean a hobby other than fucking whatever pussy I want? Hnh. Yeah. That. I'm such a fucking bastard. No wonder she said I didn't deserve her respect. I don't. I still don't and I don't know why she agreed to go on this date. My heart raced. She wants to know things about me. I made her smile.

"Um, I don't know. I'd like to go to school for composition, if that's possible. Maybe major in music. What about you?"

"Lit. English Lit. I was thinking education, too. College, though. I couldn't stand high school kids."

I nodded. Fucking true. High school kids are the most bitter, vile pieces of shit on earth. We think we know everything and that we're untouchable. Well, I know I am. But every other kid just thinks they are.

"What's your favorite color?"

"You really want to know my favorite color?"

I blushed. I fucking blushed. All of my blood rushed to my face and it felt hot as a fucking iron. I nodded and looked down at the table, playing with the paper wrapper that was crumpled next to my glass from my straw. I'm such a fucking loser. Why did I ask that? Because I wanted to know. It's random, but I want to know everything about her. Everything. I need to know, so I can sleep tonight.

"OK, whatever. Well, I guess it's green. I really like green. What about you?"

Green. Of course. Vibrant, alive, the color of life. Bella. She would like such a color. Because that is her and she gives me life. My favorite color. I thought about it. I had no idea. But then it hit me and I blushed again.

"Blue."

My voice, usually so sure and strong, was pretty weak and pathetic. I'm so stupid and useless. I should be shot. Old Yeller style. Take me out back and pop one off with a shot gun, right in the back of my head. No body would miss me. She just nodded and smiled again, taking the last bite of her taco.

"How'd you like it?"

"It was delicious. I wasn't expecting to like it but I really did."

So I wasn't doing too badly. I mean, she agreed to go out with me, right? She didn't laugh at me when I recited Shakespeare and she didn't make fun of me for wanting to play the piano for a living. I'm doing OK then. Oh god, I fucking hope. I adore her with such an intensity that I think I'd blow up a Richter scale.

"Good. How do you think that Biology test went?"

She scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Stupid. An insult to my intelligence. Can he make it any easier?"

"I know! He practically spelled it out. Shouldn't we have to think?"

"Please. The man is a joke. He is a pathetic excuse for a teacher. I can't believe we have to learn from him."

"It's pitiful."

We both nodded and finished our sodas. I felt an aching in my groin. She made me so hot. I couldn't help myself. She's so perfect and she even hates our Biology teacher. The fact that she recognized what a failure he is just solidified my feelings for her. I like her a whole fucking lot. The check came and I took out my wallet. Little waitress girl didn't stick around for long this time. The bill was for $40. I placed my card in the leather binder and looked back up to see Bella putting a $20 in.

"Bella, what are you doing? I got it."

"No, my half came to $20."

"Please, let me pay."

She laughed and shook her head, handing the leather binder thingy to the waitress.

"Edward, guys should only have to pay for girls on dates."

I froze. What? So this wasn't a date? All of my blood rushed to my face and my chest ached. I had never felt so horrible in my entire life. I had been sitting here like an idiot, thinking that god's gift to earth had agreed to go out with me and really, it was just nothing. Nothing. This wasn't a date. She didn't want to be here with me like that. She didn't like me. I knew it was too fucking good to be true. Why the hell would she want to be with me anyway? It felt like someone had hit me in the chest with a baseball bat a few dozen times. It hurt to breathe. I'm so useless and she's so much better than me. My facial expression mirrored the shock and misery I felt.

"Oh, Edward. I..I'm sorry. I thought-"

"No. It's fine. Really."

We didn't talk after that. Neither one of us knew what to say. I had made her feel uncomfortable and I was in so much pain I wanted to cry. It's kind of like when you're a little kid and you spend hours and hours coloring that stupid picture from the coloring book you like. You work so fucking hard to make sure that you color in the lines, make sure the colors look good, and you spend hours on this fucking picture. It looks good, too. And you're so happy because it comes out so perfect and you are so proud of yourself and nobody can touch you. But then somebody points out the little corner that you forgot about and it's ruined. That's how I felt. I wanted to die.

The car ride home was awkward as hell. I pulled up to the front of her house and sighed, running my fingers through my hair. See, I told you I'd need it. I can't cut it. Now she would leave and we would never speak again. It'd be too uncomfortable for her and she'd hate me forever. She gathered her things and put her hand on the door latch, looking down at the floor for a moment before taking her hand off of it. She looked up at me and she looked...conflicted. There was confusion written all over her face and she seemed so unsure.

"Look, I'm sorry that it wasn't what you thought it was. I just can't do it. I can't be another girl that you add to your list. I don't do that and I certainly won't with you. You don't take me seriously but I can assure you, I am worth way more than you want me for. I was polite and I went out with you and I had a conversation with you but I will not do anything else."

Her voice was unsteady, like she was trying not to cry. And it got quieter towards the end. I almost cried myself. She looked so vulnerable and confused and hurt. I wanted to hug her tightly to me and kiss it all away. My beautiful Bella. How could she think that? How could she possibly think I don't respect her? I respect her more than anything in the entire world. Why does she think I don't? Oh yeah, because I'm Edward Cullen. My fabulous reputation speaks for itself. I shook my head and looked her straight in the eyes, begging her to see how I really felt.

"No. It's not like that."

"Please don't. I know when I'm being played and I really don't want to go through this. Find some other girl. I can give you a few names. I know they'll play along with your charade."

"Bella, it's not like that."

I sighed and blinked for a long moment, hoping I could come up with the right words, something that would convince her. I opened my eyes to see a thin stream of tears trickling down her smooth, porcelain cheeks. I had made her cry. Fuck. I fucking hate myself. She sniffed and wiped at her face with the backs of her hands.

"Stop. I hear the way girls talk about you and then the next day they cry to their friends because you hurt them. And I can't be hurt. I won't be a one-night stand and I won't be a conquest made by some arrogant jerk that just wants to screw anything that moves."

She sounded so angry and hurt. Her voice was dripping with such pain that I could have fucking cried. How could she think that I wanted her for nothing? I needed her to breathe and she assumed I just wanted to sleep with her. Mother fucker.

"Isabella Swan, you have no idea how I feel about you."

Bella's eyes met mine and they shimmered with tears. She held my gaze, not letting it go. She was pouring her soul out again and I still felt guilty.

"What do you mean?"

This was it. I had to make her see. She is my life now and I had no choice but to lay it out. My heart was hers for the taking if she'd only have it.

"I haven't stopped thinking about you since I first met you. You are the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning and the last before I fall asleep at night. I can feel it when you walk into a room. It's so fucking strong I couldn't even hold my pen still in Biology today. You make me want things I know I can't have and I know I don't deserve. But I can't help it. My chest hurts when I think about how beautiful and perfect you are. One half of me is yours, the other half yours- Mine own, I would say; but if mine, then yours, And so all yours."

I just quoted fucking Shakespeare. I couldn't help it. She made me feel this way. She deserved to know. My voice had been low, and harsh. I sounded angry. And I was. At myself for feelings these things. I whispered it to her like it made it better if it was quiet. But it didn't matter. Because the second I finished speaking, she blinked back a tear and she opened the door and got out, slamming the door behind her and running into her house. I fucking hate myself.

**Well.....was it what you thought? Please tell me :) And don't worry, things will get better....**


	7. Chapter 7

**IMPORTANT! Please read below!**

**I've created some confusion and I'm sorry for this. It was never stated that Bella was an outcast or wasn't normal. In other stories, this seems to be the theme. Edward is popular and gorgeous, and Bella is the girl nobody knows. But this is not other stories. Bella isn't popular, but she's not an outcast or the 'weirdo' nobody will talk to. She's just average. She talks to people and has a small group of friends, who you will meet later, but Edward just didn't know her because she isn't one of the sluts he entertains himself with. Alice knew of her, so it's not like she was the freak nobody knew. Sorry if I created confusion or if you don't like the story now. If anything, I think it makes it more interesting because that just shows how horrible Edward was prior to meeting Bella. He really had to be completely self-absorbed to not notice her if she was just a normal girl. I think this will also make it harder on Edward because Bella doesn't need him to 'break her out of her shell'. Her self esteem is usual for her character, but she's not a hermit like she is normally portrayed. So, sorry! Thanks for reading guys :)**

"She ran? Like jogged?"

I sighed and pushed my lower legs forward, raising the weights on the machine with my quads. I have really nice fucking quads. I don't even care. My life is over.

"No, not jogged, Jasper. I said she fucking ran, didn't I? Full out ran away from me."

She almost fell when she got up the steps to her front door. But I left that out. She's so beautiful when she stumbles. Is that right for me to think that? Well I do. But it doesn't matter. She hates me and my life is over. I hadn't slept at all. The dark circles that were usually under my eyes were impossibly dark and my hair was even more of a wreck. My hair doesn't like it when I don't get enough sleep. I always look like a bum, but it is especially messy when I don't sleep. I had stayed up the entire night playing the piano. I'm sure my parents were ready to shoot me. Alice understood, though.

Lucky bitch. She was going to Port Angeles with Bella today. Some weekend flee market thing. They sell a lot of shit that nobody needs but Alice is always up for shopping. They really hit it off, those two. Bella loves Alice. But me? Oh no. She fucking hates me with such a passion. Her voice when she spoke to me was so horrible sickening. She sounded upset and angry and conflicted and confused. And it was my fault. I hate myself for it and I'll never forgive myself either. I could never forgive myself for hurting her like I did. But she couldn't possibly feel the agony that I felt when she ran. I pushed out another rep and grunted as I did so. Emmett was standing next to the machine and he had added another ten pounds.

"I don't think you did anything wrong, Edwin. I mean, besides being a total fucking freak show and quoting Shakespeare like a bitch. You're just that much of a cocksucker that she doesn't like you. Drop it."

"I can't drop it. I still can't stop thinking about her. "

Like it would be that easy. Like I could just forget how beautiful she is. Or how her smell intoxicates me and makes me dizzy. Or how her laugh makes me lose my breath. If only it were that easy. I'm in too deep. It's not happening.

"No. Don't drop it. You still have a chance."

I fucking love Jasper. He's a really good guy.

"But I blew it. Completely. She won't talk to me now, not after everything that happened."

"Well then keep trying. You think Alice gave me a second thought the first time I hit on her?"

How the fuck should I know? I avoided the two of them together for a long time. It made me want to throw up to see the way my best friend was looking at my baby sister. I stood up from the machine. I knew Jasper was right. He's always fucking right. I sighed as I stepped onto the treadmill. I love running. I'm just good at it. I can run for miles and miles without breaking a sweat. It helps clear my head, though I don't think anything will get Bella's perfect face out. I set a furious pace and tried to run away from the hurt.

"I mean, maybe I should go to her house?"

"Mm...that's a little pushy, especially since you already threw your heart at her. Maybe something more subtle."

"Like what?"

"A letter."

"A letter."

"Yep. Give it to her in class."

"And what, pray tell, do you suggest I write in this letter? 'My Dearest Bella, We the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect Uni-'"

"No, you dunce. Tell her your feeling. Apologize for coming on too strong. Tell her you still want to be friends. Jesus, Edward. I'm trying to help."

I sighed and pushed the button to up the speed of the belt. I needed to run this off bad. My chest was aching. I couldn't breathe right. I wasn't sure if it was from the running or from the pain I was feeling since I had last seen Bella.

So now here I was, working out with Jasper and Emmett as I tried to solve my problems. It's not going to happen, but I can try, right?

"You should bring her a gift."

Emmett grunted out a coherent sentence as he did another bicep curl. My head almost fell off my shoulders. Fucking perfect.

"Emmett, you are a genius!"

"I've been telling everybody that for a while now. But nobody listens. I'm just unheard, nobody cares. Nobody loves me. I don't mat-"

"Shut up, Emmett. Jasper, when is Alice coming home?"

"A few hours."

Alice would be able to help me pick something out. I needed to show her that I can be the guy she wants me to be. I can be it for her. She needs to see how much I need her and how much I crave her. What do I do? Reciting Shakespeare doesn't work. She's too complex for that, she's too smart. I needed something classic, beautiful, like her. She's so beautiful. I need her too much.

My heart pounded as I got dressed for school. Clean jeans without holes in them, check. Tee shirt that I bribed my sister to iron, check. Hair brushed and gelled, check. But it wasn't laying flat. It never would. I clenched my teeth as I tried to smooth it down. No cigar. It stood up all over the place like usual. Like a stuck my finger in a fucking electrical socket. After ten minutes of useless effort, I sighed and just gave up. I looked OK.

I had even shaved. I did a good job, too. I didn't miss anything. Sometimes I get a little lazy and let a little stubble stay around my jaw. Today I was clean as a whistle and I even used some aftershave. I was ready. I grabbed the letter I had written Bella and the bouquet of flowers I picked up for her. That's a gift, right? I got her purple hyacinths. You know those flowers with meanings, well these meant 'Please forgive me'. It's true. You can Google it. Now or fucking never.

I walked into class with my backpack on my shoulder and the flowers in my hand, the letter tucked into the bouquet. I immediately felt her. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and my heart rate increased tenfold. The electric current was there and very much alive. It made me shiver. My eyes darted to our lab table. I hate how nervous she makes me. Newton. Michael fucking Newton was sitting in her chair. No. I stormed over to the table, my footsteps furiously echoing throughout the room, not even remembering to look around for where my Bella was sitting now.

"What. The. Fuck."

"Yo, Edward! My man! What's goin' on? Flowers? Thanks. But you know I don't roll that way."

"This isn't your seat. Move."

"Oh, yeah, dude. Banner switched my seat. I sit here now and Bella sits with my old partner, Angela Webber. The two probably arranged it. They're always together anyway. But yeah, Edward, um..So Bella asked me to tell you something. She uh, she asked me to tell you to not talk to her or she'd just switch out of this class all together. And yeah so we're going on a date tomorrow night. Pretty sweet, huh? She asked _me_ out! She's fucking hot. I can't wait to get some of that."

He looked down the blank page of notebook paper in front of him. No. I was seeing spots. How could this be? I couldn't breathe again.

"Did you do the homework last night? I fell asleep."

My chest contracted and I felt like somebody had a vice grip on my throat. Suffocating me. Of course. How could she stand being next to me every day after what I had done to her? My fists clamped down harder around the flowers in my hand and the stems snapped. I turned on my heel and tried to control my breathing, but it was coming out in shallow gasps. I had to leave, there was no way I'd be able to stay. The trash can was to my right as I walked through the door and I through the flowers in it with such a force that it looked like it was going to topple for a minute.

I went straight to my car and turned the engine over. I had to get away. I had to. The spots I had been seeing before were starting to change color so I leaned my forehead on the steering wheel and closed my eyes, breathing deeply through my nose. I wanted to cry. I wanted to fucking cry. Not only did she not want me, she couldn't even be next to me. And she asked out Newton? And then it happened. My vision got blurry and my eyelashes got wet. My eyes were leaking. A lot. I cried like a little bitch because it hurt me too much to think that Bella would go so far so stay away from me. What the fuck is wrong with me? I couldn't handle it. I threw my car into reverse and pulled out of the lot, heading north. I don't know where the fuck I'd end up, but I needed to get away. Fuck. My parents. I grabbed my phone and texted Alice. Not smart, since I was driving, but my judgement has always been questionable.

**Al, **

**I'm going away. I'm safe. Just tell Mom and Dad I'm ok. I'll be home soon.**

**Edward**

I'll be home soon. That was a lie. I went away for two weeks. What the fuck had I been doing? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I wallowed in self pity and stayed at a hotel. Where? British Columbia. Yep. I went to fucking Canada. My family called me non-stop. If it wasn't from the house phone, it was my mother's cell, then my dad's. I hated that they were worried about me. I knew I was hurting them beyond measure but I just couldn't be there, in the same town as her. It just hurt too fucking much.

I sent them a text every morning, telling them I was safe and that I would be home soon. My dad would always send me one back saying that he trusted me and he just loved me. I don't deserve my family. I run away for two weeks and they just put more money into my account and tell me to be safe. I don't fucking deserve them.

I stepped out of the shower on day fifteen and began to towel off my hair. Fuck. My chest still hurt when I took a deep breath. She knocked the wind out of my and I had yet to get it back. My cell phone vibrated on the night stand, just as it did every morning around this time. I walked over to see who it was. Jasper and Emmett called more than any of them, but that's to be expected. They were probably pissed off as hell. I looked at the caller-id. It was a number I didn't know, and it wasn't in my address book. What the hell? I answered it.

"Hello?"

"Edward Anthony Cullen! Where the hell do you get off running away?"

"Bella?"

"Do you know how worried everyone is about you? You just leave and don't think about how it would hurt your family and friends? You are sicker than I thought you were. What the hell is wrong with you? Get your sorry ass back home. NOW!" _Click._

The line went dead. Oh shit.


	8. Chapter 8

**You are all so amazing. I can't thank you enough for reviewing!**

**Ok, I'm going to change it up a bit. I think you all need to see things from Bella's perspective. We all know how Edward thinks now but my Bella is different than most. Enjoy :)**

Alice paced back and forth in front of me, her short strides wearing a path into the carpet on her bedroom floor. It's white and immaculate, just like the rest of her room. Everything is clean and perfect and tidy and organized to the nth degree. But, it's Alice. Would you expect anything else? Her arms were folded across her chest and she was rambling on furiously. The worry lines caused by her furrowed brow were probably going to be there for the rest of her life if she didn't stop.

"Alice. He's fine. He just texted you this morning."

I love her to death, I really do, but she's getting to me. Edward texted them every day and told them he was OK. I mean, hey, I don't agree with his actions, but I don't think Alice should be having a heart attack, either. She's so small. I'm sure one slight palpitation would take her out. She stopped pacing and threw her hands up in the air dramatically, in true Alice fashion.

"How can he be fine? He's alone, Bella! We don't even know where he is! What if he's dead and it's really his murderer texting us? Hm? Did you think of that?"

She began pacing again. Her ramblings continued. I couldn't stand to see her look like this anymore. It made my heart clench. Amazing. I had only known her for a week or so but I already felt like we were sisters separated at birth. We told each other everything and we had this connection, it's kind of indescribable. I just know that I couldn't survive without her. But she is related to Edward.

Edward. The thought made me nauseous. He confused the hell out of me. First, he's this player that ruined poor Jessica. I mean, he told her she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. He said she 'made his insides melt'. They were a couple for all of twenty-four hours when she found him in the back of Lauren Mallory's Suburban, going at it like rabbits. She cried and cried for days. I'm a pretty good friend and I was there for her. I didn't say it out loud, but I had told her so. I told her he wasn't any good to her and that he was a liar and a player. But she fell for him. She fell for his charm and it just got her ruined. She was always such a bright and sunny girl. She loved everybody whole heartedly and put everything she had into life. Edward Cullen successfully destroyed one of my best friends and for that I'm sure I could never forgive him.

I had seen it before. For years I watched as my mother fell for the charmer, the perfect man. Gorgeous, wealthy, smart, witty, charismatic. They always say the right things at the right time and they always know how to put on the baby face to get out of trouble. And she went back to them, all so perfect. And each time she went back, they'd hurt her again. I'd put her to bed. Tuck her in, take off her eye makeup so it didn't get on her pillowcase. Remove her shoes and pants, turn off the lights, and return to my room to listen to her sob uncontrollably for the rest of the night.

I remember one particular morning that I don't think I will ever forget, where I believe I saw my mother at her worst. We were going on a class trip and I still needed her to sign my permission slip. I went into her room, paper and pen in hand. Renee was still in bed just as I had left her the night before. I walked over to her bed and knelt next to her on the floor. Her eyes were haunted looking, empty. She looked dead. And I'll never forget the look in her eyes the morning after another perfect man had ruined her, just like Edward ruined Jessica.

I was there for her, like any supportive daughter and I let her cry on my shoulder. Before long, it hurt me just as much as it hurt her and I couldn't take it anymore. I tried telling her to stop it, but it just never happened. Now this time she met the perfect Mr. Perfect. He's just that much smoother that he convinced her to marry him. Well, I won't be there when the walls come crashing down. I can't handle it anymore. So I moved in with Charlie.

And now Edward is trying to pull one up on me? Sorry, buddy, but I have grown an immunity to jerks like you. He could never get to me. I wouldn't let him. I had let myself down by crying in front of him but I promised myself that I would never have haunted, dead eyes because of him. I owed myself that much. And the way he was hurting his family right now with his little hissy fit, it only solidified my feelings of disdain for him.

Why did he have to pick me? Of all people. Me. He has it down pat. Perfect, gorgeous bronze hair with lighter strands that reflect the sunlight. His eyes are the most brilliant shade of green I have ever seen, and they sparkle as he speaks. His eyelashes are long and thick and they make his eyes so appealing you find yourself lost in them. It's like you're looking into the ocean, except it's green, and there are waves of color and fire crashing around you. It's intoxicating.

He doesn't know the right thing to say, though. He puts his foot in his mouth all the time and he rarely makes much sense. But, it's still perfect. Because you can't help but smile. He's endearing, almost. Mr. Perfect. I can't allow myself to fall for the act. It's an act, that's all. He just wants to get into my pants and then ditch me for someone else, whom he will also ditch for someone else. It won't happen to me. I do not like him and his act will not work on me.

"Alice, please, sit down. You're going to be sick."

She looked over at me then. Her normally pale face was stark white. It was a very real possibility that she might pass out. Like a good girl, she sat down on the bed next to me and sighed, attempting to control her heart beat.

"Bella."

She croaked out a single word before the tears began to fall. Tears streamed down her cheeks and she leaned to the side a bit to rest her head on my shoulder, which I was more than happy to offer. I put my arm around her shoulders and I held her snuggly against my side.

"Alice, he will be OK. He is OK."

"H-he-he's never been away f-for this long."

"He's left before?"

"O-on-ly once. Aft-er h-he had a fight wi-th Dad."

So he'd put his poor family through this hell before. I sighed and rubbed her upper arm.

"Do you want me to try calling him? He won't know my number."

Her eyes shot open and she nodded vigorously.

"Oh, please? Will you? Please, Bella?"

I'd do anything to help my friend, even if it meant speaking to the one I hated and resented the most, Edward Cullen.

**Ok, new chapter with different interactions tomorrow! Please review and let me know what you think of Bella. **


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks for the reviews. They've been really constructive and it's helped a lot. I hope Bella's chapter helped shape your view of her a bit. She's different than most other Bella's and I understand if some of you don't like her. But really, we don't know her yet. So keep reading! ;)**

I'm such a fuck up. Why do I always manage to screw everybody? Seriously. It's like I just can't do anything right. But then again, I knew going away for a bit would have been a bad idea. But I did it anyway because I couldn't handle myself. I had never been so hurt in my entire life. So I ran, like a little fucking kid. I'm such a bitch. Honestly, I've seen many guys turned down and they don't run away to British Columbia for two weeks. No. They got over it and moved on, moved forward and forgot about it.

But I can promise you that none of them have ever wanted to be with the girl as much as I want to be with Bella. It's just not possible. There is no way they need her to breathe. They don't think about her non-stop and dream about only her at night. I swear to god I can even taste her. And her smell. Shit. I crave it like a heroine addict craves a fix. I'm not a drug addict, I'm...a Bella addict, I guess. She's my brand of heroin.

Fifteen hours I had been driving. Fifteen fucking hours of pure hell. Uncertainty, really. I had no idea what to expect when I got home. Surely, everybody would be pissed at me. Understandably so. Alice. I groaned when I thought about my poor sister and leaned my head against the steering wheel, parked at the end of my driveway. She's probably been crying for days. And I did that to her. I'm such a fuck up. My mother. I groaned again. My perfect mother. She's everything I could ever ask for and I've hurt her. I bet she's been worried sick. I got into a fight with my dad once and I went away for only two days. She had thrown up five times in that forty-eight hours and collapsed from exhaustion.

And my father. My father was surely livid. It doesn't take much for me to piss him off and I'm sure I did a fine fucking job pushing his buttons this time. I was sure to get a nice verbal beating from him when I got into the house. When I actually went in, that is. I was still sitting at the end of my driveway, breathing deeply and debating how much of me would be left when my father was finished with me.

I like my dad, I do, really. But we just don't see eye to eye. Of course every father wants their son to follow in their footsteps and take over the family business. That's all fine and dandy until the father and son talk about it and realize that the son doesn't want to hold up his end of the bargain. That's me. The asshole with a problem with the equation. I don't want to be a doctor. I know, I must sound horrible. Helping people, granting life and taking away pain. I don't want that. I just don't. You know how you know you want to do something but can't figure out why? Well, I want to write music. Apparently that isn't easy to do when you're in med school so my dad thinks it's a bad idea. And I don't think me being a doctor would be a good idea. So we are at an impasse.

And Bella. Her voice on the phone..I never thought she could get so angry. She sounded like she wanted to fucking kill me. Another thing for her to be mad at me about. Great. I'm such a winner. I don't disagree with her, I mean, I am a dick. My family could surely hate me. And Bella will definitely hate me. So in the end I just screwed myself even more. Perfect. I'm just Mr. Perfect, aren't I?

'Now or never, Cullen! Pull yourself together!' Yeah, yeah. I know. I thought he was supposed to be looking out for me. I pulled down the driveway and made my way to the door. Fuck me.

"Edward."

The second I walked through the door, my mother was hugging me. She launched herself forward and wrapped her arms around me in a vice grip. She cried quietly while she held me, squeezing me tighter and rubbing my back with her hands, murmuring under her breath that she was thankful I was alive. How could she think that I was dead? I texted her every day. Just a mother thing, I guess. I hugged her back and sighed.

"I'm sorry, Mom. I'm OK. I promised you I was OK."

She sniffled a bit and pulled back, but still held onto me tightly. Her eyes were bloodshot and her cheeks looked like they had been wet for a while. Her hair, which was normally styled perfectly and tidy, was a little wavy and looked like it had air dried. She looked beautiful but she'd never walk around like that under normal circumstances.

"I was so worried about you. You just left. Two weeks, Edward. Two weeks! What was I supposed to think? We don't even know why you left!"

Her voice never rose above a strong whisper. I could tell she didn't want my father to hear her. He was nowhere to be found, probably in his office plotting ways to get me to a boarding school of some sort. Military academy maybe. I couldn't tell her why I left. If I told her, she'd be so disappointed in me I'm not sure she'd be able to look at me. I'm such a bastard.

"Mom, I'm sorry. I really am sorry. I promise it won't happen again."

Something passed across her eyes. She looked tired but not defeated. My mother would never be defeated. She's too strong and smart for that. It wasn't defeat that I saw in her, something lighter. Like she was just choosing her battles. She doesn't know what the fuck to do with me. I don't deserve her. She loves me unconditionally and didn't even press the issue of my whereabouts. She's just happy that I'm home. I really, really don't deserve her.

"I promise. Never again, Mom."

I kissed her on her forehead and hugged her once more before tossing my bag towards the stairs. One parent down, one more to go. I stepped to the side of my mother and began to walk towards the back of the house.

"Edward, now's not a good time. I wouldn't go back there right now. Maybe tomorrow. Give him some time."

I sighed and turned around. My shoulders sagged. She's always right. It'd be suicide to go into his layer unarmed. I'd leave in a body bag.

"Go see your sister. She's been so worried about you."

I nodded and went upstairs, taking my bag with me. Walking down the hall once I got upstairs, I tossed my bag into my room and went across the hall to Alice's room, not even bothering to take off my coat. I needed to see her and see if she was alright. I know I hurt her more than anybody. We were ridiculously close for siblings, more like best friends. Jasper and Emmett really are my best friends but you can't replace a strong bond with a sibling for a friend. Well, not between me and Alice anyway.

My hand reached for the knob but before I could turn it, the door was whooshed open and a little Pixie was glued to my front. Her arms and legs were wrapped tightly around me and the wind was officially knocked out of me. She's strong for such a small person. She was crying just as my mother had but it wasn't quite as graceful and quiet. She was bawling and I felt her tears go right through my jacket. I held her to me and walked back to her bed, sitting myself down on the edge of it while she cried. After a few moments she climbed off my lap and in true Alice form, stood up and straightened herself out. She smoothed down her shirt and adjusted the waist band of her yoga pants. I just watched, unsure of what to do with myself. She looked up at the ceiling, wiping away the mascara that had made its way under her eyes. When she was satisfied, she looked at me finally. I shrunk back.

"Hey, Al."

Her eyes narrowed and she scrunched up her little nose, her lips going to a tight straight line. And then she hit me. Her little fist wailed into my shoulder and I was actually knocked back by the force of it.

"Edward Anthony Cullen, what the heck were you thinking scaring me like that?"

I sat up. Her fists were planted, safely, on her little hips and she was tapping her foot. Her facial expression was still the same. Pissed off. Yeah, I fucked up.

"I'm sorry. I just needed to leave."

"So you just go without telling anybody where you were going? We didn't know if you were actually OK, Edward. You can't just do that. I was out of my mind worried for you."

She began pacing, walking back and forth in front of me, almost wearing a path in the carpet at the furious pace she was going.

"I know. I'm sorry. I really am sorry."

"How could you do that to me?"

I shook my head. Because I'm a selfish bastard and I never think about anyone but myself. No, I think about Bella. That's what got me into this mess.

"I couldn't be here anymore, Al. Not after what happened."

She stopped then and looked at me, a small frown gracing her little face. Her shoulders slumped and she sat down next to me, taking one of my big hands in both of hers.

"I am sorry about that, Edward. I know what happened. She told me. I know it must feel awful."

"You have no idea. I've never felt worse in my entire life. She makes me so crazy. I can't get enough of her. And then she just..."

I didn't even know where to begin. I spread my knees and rested my elbows on them, my head falling into my hands. Alice's hand rubbed my shoulder, the one she had punched mind you, and she sighed.

"I know, I know. I won't tell you her reasonings, that's not my place, but I will tell you that you can't give up. Don't give up on her, ever. Your reputation has unfortunately made a lasting first impression but there's still a chance for you to make up for it."

I cringed. My reputation was the whole reason I was in a mess in the first place and now I was supposed to fight it? Nearly impossible. I sighed. I would never stop fighting for her. Alice need not worry about that.

"So, how did you survive without me, anyway?"

I looked up at her and flashed her a grin, trying to lighten up the mood. She slapped my shoulder, hard, and smirked.

"Bella, stupid."

Bella. My Bella. I smiled. She made my heart jump.

"Where is she?"

"My bathroom."

"What?"

"She had to pee. Don't hold it against her."

"No, no. I mean, why is she here?"

"Because I needed a friend and she's here for me. Duh?"

Of course. Only Bella would be in my house at eleven thirty at night just because my sister needed her. She's too good for me. She's too good for anybody. Her heart is too perfect. I don't deserve her, or anybody for that matter. But I felt at ease for the first time in two weeks. My senses were overwhelmed with her. Her scent lingered in my sister's room. Strawberries and freesia. Pure heaven. How had I not noticed she was here? She wasn't too close yet so the electricity running through me was weak at best. But it was getting stronger.

"Go, go. I'll send her to your room."

Alice huffed and pushed me out her door and towards my own. I went in. My room had been cleaned since I left. Esme's nervous habit. Cleaning. I took off my coat and ran my fingers through my hair, unsure. What the hell do I say to her? Hi, Bella, I'm crazy and I can't handle rejection so I ran away. Hnh. 'Explain yourself, you fool!' There he is. Such a good guy. I had to tell her why I did it. She can't think I'm just some jerk that ran from nothing. She needs to know. She had to know that I breathe for her now.

"Edward?"

My head snapped up and I turned. Her sweet voice. I hadn't heard it in two weeks and it made my stomach jump. It's so beautiful. She's so beautiful. My angel. She was in my doorway, only ten feet away. And it smacked me in the face like a tidal wave. I felt her. She moved closer to me and sat on my bed. So fucking close. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up on end and my finger tips tingled. The air in my lungs suddenly seemed like it wasn't enough, like I wasn't satisfied with simply oxygen. I needed so much more and I needed her. Badly.

"Bella, I-"

"No, Edward. Just listen. I only called you because Alice needed me to."

I sat down next to her, not quite next to her but near enough that my head was swimming. Her scent made me dizzy but I loved it just the same. She's so fucking beautiful. She licked her lips and I almost fell over. They're so perfectly blush colored, rosy. And so full and things she does to me. I watched as she furrowed her brow and sighed, her shoulders sagging. She really does hate me.

"I know. I'm an asshole. I really am."

"Why'd you leave, hurt your sister like that?"

"I couldn't be here anymore. Not after...not after what happened."

"After what happened?"

I sighed. Did she really not know how much she affected me? How much she means to me?

"After you moved your seat and you told Newton that you never wanted to speak to me again. I just..."

I shook my head and looked away. I'm pathetic. I can't even look at her. It's enough that I want to touch her and I can't. I'm so weak and ashamed of myself. It's no wonder she can't respect me. I'm not respectable.

"I'm sorry that I hurt you. I am, really. I didn't mean to hurt you so much. I never wanted to but I just can't be what you want me to be."

"That's what you don't understand. I don't want you to be anything. I'll be whatever you want me to be."

I looked up at her then, so desperate. Why couldn't she see how much I needed her? If it were raining, I'd be her raincoat. If she were tired, I'd be a bed she could lay on. She looked back at me and caught my eyes, holding onto it for dear life. And I got lost in hers. And just like before I felt guilty because it felt like she was giving me her soul simply by looking into my eyes. The depth of the color in them is so startling. It's like chocolate, with flecks of caramel. But they glisten and seem to get more complex the longer you look into them. She broke our eye contact and looked down at her hands in her lap, fidgeting nervously.

"Why won't you let me, Bella?"

"I've seen what you do and how you do it and I can't let it happen to me."

"It's so different with you, Bella. You think I would have been hurt if you were just some girl? I told you what you are to me. I don't know you that well so it sounds crazy but I only want to get to know you and nobody else. Isn't that enough?"

I wouldn't scare her again and tell her that I'm obsessed with her, though she might have guessed by now. She just needed to believe me.

"I'm really not a bad person."

"You know, if it weren't for your sister, I wouldn't believe you."

She looked up from her hands and smiled softly, her guard slowly coming down. But it wasn't gone all the way yet. She still had reservations and I would do everything in my power to take it all down, take down her walls and be with her. But if we could at least be friends, it would be enough to keep me going. But I would never stop fighting for her heart. Because she had mine. I wasn't joking when I had quoted Shakespeare. My heart jumped when I saw her smile. It was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen, and I grinned in return.

"I'll give you a chance, I guess. But only because of Alice. I love her and she begged me to, so I will. But there are no second chances, Edward. You have one shot to make it work. Just, please, don't hurt me?"

Her eyebrows turned up in question and she looked so unsure of herself. What did she have to be unsure of? She's so perfect and I'm so unworthy of her.

"I will never, ever hurt you, Bella. Please know that. I meant what I said that night. One half of me is yours, the other half yours- Mine own, I would say; but if mine, then yours, And so all yours."

She still looked conflicted and brought her bottom lip into her mouth. She chewed it nervously for a bit and I fought back a groan that rumbled in my chest despite my best efforts. Everything she does is sexy. I wanted to be chewing on that lip, to be the one knowing what it tastes like. My fingers danced on the comforter beneath me and I had to clench my fists to keep from touching her.

"I'm trying to hate you but it's a little hard when you're quoting A Merchant of Venice."

She released her lower lip and a small, almost imperceptible smile graced her mouth. I released a breath I hadn't realized I was holding and I smiled. Not a little like she was, but a full out grin that spread from ear to ear. She smiled a little wider and sighed.

"Well, I have to go home. It's late."

I nodded and sighed, running my hand through my hair.

"OK, but, um..Bella? Do you think you could sit in your old seat tomorrow at school? In Biology? I don't think I can handle it if you sit in the back of the room."

"Yeah, sure. I'd rather sit with you than Jessica, anyway. She's not very good at Biology."

Her laughter tinkled in my ears and I about lost it. She's so perfect, from her smile to her beautiful laughter. My heart raced. But I still needed to know one more thing before I let her go.

"Thanks. But can I ask you something?"

"You just did."

Feisty little thing.

"Uh. Another question then. Why did you ask out Newton? I mean, of all people. Why Newton?"

She sighed and shrugged, looking around my room at anything else but me.

"He was there and I knew he would tell you. It was the only thing I could do that would make you see I didn't want to be around you. I didn't want to, I never did go out with him, but I panicked and I knew you wouldn't try to apologize to me then. Self preservation, you know?"

I nodded and looked down at the floor. She only asked him out to piss me off, well, so that I wouldn't talk to her. That's better than actually liking Newton, I guess. My arms felt so empty with her next to me but not touching me. I wanted to hold her and hug her and feel her skin on mine. I could only imagine how soft and silky it would be. The way her hair bounced around her shoulders, it made me want to touch it. But I couldn't. It'd be too much too soon.

"I understand."

She smiled softly and stood, turning to me before approaching the door.

"Good night, Edward."

"Good night, good night. Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow."

"Stop it, Edward! Good. Night!"

She giggled again and walked out of my room, closing the door behind her. Holy shit. My life is complete. Bella Swan will talk to me _and_ give me a chance. I don't think my heart can take it.

Before I went to sleep I needed to see Jasper and Emmett. There was no way in hell they'd forgive me but I owed them at least an explanation. That was the longest we'd every been apart and I hadn't spoken to them in two weeks. That's a lifetime. I reached for my phone and began to dial Emmett.

"Where is he?"

I heard the front door open with a crash and Emmett's booming voice resonate throughout the first floor of my house. No need to call then. Two pairs of heavy footsteps thudded up my stairs and pounded down the hall. My door burst open and there stood Emmett and Jasper, both looking like I had just killed their puppies. Two very pissed off guys that work out. Not a good combination.

"Where the fuck have you been, Edward?"

I braced myself as Emmett came through the door first. His shoulders were nearly as wide as the door frame anyway so there was no way Jasper would be able to get through at the same time. Instead of the punch I was ready for, I was lurched forward and into a pair of gorilla-strong arms. He hugged my tightly to his chest and squeezed hard, lifting me off the ground so that our shoulders were square. I couldn't breathe. When I started to wheeze, he released me and put me down, stepping back. He was pissed. Almost as pissed as Alice was when I went into her room.

"What is wrong with you, douche bag? You just leave? What the fuck? We didn't know where the hell you went, you didn't tell us you were leaving...I thought you were fucking dead, Edward."

He called me Edward. He must truly be upset.

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm a dick."

"That's the understatement of the fucking century. Texting your sister saying, 'I'm OK', doesn't cut it. I shouldn't have had to hear about my best friend's welfare from my girlfriend, no matter how you're related. That's just fucked up."

"I won't be able to make it up to you, but I just needed to leave."

Jasper looked just as pissed at Emmett, but more hurt. Emmett seemed to just get angry but Jasper would take something like this personally.

"Guys, I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. I am. I don't know what else to say. I'm just sorry. I shouldn't have done it. I would never do it again and I wouldn't have done it a first time if I knew the repercussions. Just forgive me, OK?"

They exchanged a look and sighed.

"Yeah. As long as you're alright, Edger."

I smiled. I fucking love my friends.

"Hey, uh, she's going to give me a chance. She said we could talk now."

They both rolled their eyes and shook their heads.

"Well, then all is right in the world. Now where is your sister?"

Jasper left then and went to Alice's room and Emmett left my house to go do something to Rosalie. What that something is, I don't want to know and neither does anybody else for that matter. They're disgusting.

**Woohoo! Edward and Bella can get the ball rolling now... REVIEW! Let me know what you think :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks so much for the reivews! They are the reason I update every day, or almost every day!**

**Here's the confrontation...get ready. My Carlisle is NOT like SM's. Just a warning, you will not like him.**

"It's been five days, Edward. You need to see him."

I sighed and rolled back over, pulling the blankets up over my head. I had done a stellar job of avoiding my dad for forty-eight hours. My mom said give him time, I'm giving him time. I'm no idiot. I listen to my mother. But right now I was seriously considering breaking the trend. Why should I go see my dad? It's not necessary.

"Mom..."

"Get up."

I heard the click of her walk as she strode across my floor, the sound of her heels hitting hardwood bouncing off the walls. Closer, closer, closer. She stopped next to my bed and I squeezed my eyes shut. For the love of god, don't make me go. But she was. She tore off my blankets with one swoop, leaving me freezing in just boxers with nothing to guard me from the cool air of my bedroom. I groaned as goose bumps covered my skin.

"Get. Up. Or so help me, Edward Anthony, I will take you down myself. Don't you underestimate me."

"You said give him time. And stop looking at me in my underwear."

"Oh, shut up. I gave birth to you and diapered that butt. It's not like you're naked. I bought those boxers you're wearing. Go downstairs."

"No."

"Edward. You were gone. For two weeks. Two weeks we were missing our son. He was gone. And we didn't know if it was actually you texting us or some murderer. Two weeks. Three hundred and thirty six hours. You owe him at least an explanation."

She sounded to hurt and angry, but just whispered at me. That's worse than being screamed at. I groaned. Like a fucking toddler. But I couldn't help it. Confronting my father about what happened would be like signing over my life. I might as well write a living will. I have possessions. I'm worth something. Who would want my shit? Nobody. She sighed and shook her head. I'm such a fuck up.

"Put some clothes on. Now. Go down stairs. He's in his study. And Edward..."

"Yeah?"

"I love you. Thank you for coming home."

And she walked out of the room. I sighed and got up, going to my closet to grab a pair of sweat pants and a tee shirt. 'You can do it! Just go down there, and take it like a man.' Easy for you to say. I made my way down the stairs and down the back hall, to the lair. The dungeon, pits of hell. his study. I opened the door and stepped in.

It's such a scary room. The walls are paneled in mahogany and have built-in bookshelves, holding volumes upon volumes of medical texts and journals. The floor is covered in a thick navy blue carpet and does nothing to help lighten the room. Add to that the ridiculous sconces on the walls that really only provide a glow. And then there's the fireplace. It flickers and casts shadows around the office, giving that eerie feel of the library in Beauty and the Beast. The one where the beast broods. That's Carlisle. The beast, brooding and...just..ugh.

I walked forward and sat down in a chair in front of his desk, opposite my father. The back of his leather chair was turned to me so I couldn't see him. But I knew he was there.

"Mom said to come and see you."

He turned his chair and faced me. Fuck. Judging by the facial expressions, livid doesn't even begin to cover it. I looked him in the eye, though. I'm not a fucking coward. And I'm not going to let him mow me down like he tries to. No fucking way. I saw his jaw clench and his nostrils flare. He put his arm on the desk in front of him, his forearm taught as his fist clenched.

"You have some nerve, _Edward_. What the _hell_ is wrong with you?"

I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"I don't know, _Dad_. I needed to leave and I did. I'm not proud of it and I'm sorry for making you guys worry."

His eyebrows narrowed and his fist came down hard on the desk.

"That's not enough! Sorry? Your mother was sick with worry. When are you going to get a hold of yourself and grow up?"

Fucking bringing my mother into this. He's a coward and he can't handle admitting he might have been worried about me. So instead, like the bastard he is, he uses my mother as a shield. I know I hurt my mother but for him to use her as fuel, it made my skin crawl. I'm more of a mother fucking grown up then he'll ever be. Having a degree doesn't make you a man. Just more of an asshole in his case.

"Grow up? And what would that entail?"

Go ahead. Tell me what you think I should be. Like a little bitch. Pushing what he knows on my because he can't handle me having my own fucking dreams. Bastard. He didn't speak. His dead eyes bore into mine and we had a staring contest. Who'd be weak enough to look away first. Not me. No fucking way. I wouldn't let him win.

"Say it, Carlisle. Say it. What do I need to do to be a grown up? Hm? Just say it."

His fist slammed down on the table again, rattling the drawers inside.

"Get your head out of your ass! Focus, get some direction. You don't just leave for a while because you feel like it and then expect everything to be OK. The school hasn't excused those absences. Your grades suffered from that little stunt you pulled."

My grades suffered. So now I have a 3.4, not a 4.0. Big fucking deal. The music schools I want to go to only require a 3.2. And with my SAT and ACT scores I'll be just fucking fine. But that's not it. That's not what he means. Music school isn't what he means. We continued to stare.

"You're not finished. Why do my grades matter, _Dad_?"

"You need good grades to get into colleges, Edward."

"What colleges? For what major?"

Say it. I fucking dare you. Tell me what I need to major in.

"Medical school! Medical school. Pre-med major. That's what you need good grades for. Don't bait me, Edward. You know where this is going."

I exploded. I can't handle it anymore. I stood up from my chair with such force that it fell back behind me with a thud against the carpet. My fists clenched at my sides.

"I don't want to go to medical school."

I spoke through clenched teeth as I fought for his eye contact in the dim light. I couldn't find it but my eyes still bore into his with a fierce intensity.

"Sit down."

"No. I'm sick of this shit. I'm not going to medical school."

"Yes. You. Are."

I turned to leave. If I had to spend one more minute with him in that room, he'd leave in a body bag. The bastard can't even be glad that I'm home. He just cares about my mother fucking grades because of stupid medical school. I never thought I'd have such resentment for my own father. But he makes me so nauseous.

"Don't you dare walk out on me."

"No. I'm done with you, Dad. I can't do this anymore. I honestly thought for a minute that you'd be happy I was home. I guess as long as my grades are kept up, it's all good, right?"

I didn't even look at him this time. I'm so tired. Just so fucking tired of living up to what he wants me to be. And I can't. And it's draining.

I needed to feel like me, make him understand. I walked to my piano in the living room. It was placed strategically in the house so that no matter where you were, you could hear the sound of it's music. I would make him fucking understand. He would know what I wanted. I sat down at the bench and lifted the cover. My fingers itched to touch the keys and so I let them, gave in to the temptation. It felt so good. I began to play. It came out of nowhere but I played a song. It just happened and I felt my chest grow lighter and lighter. The notes kept coming and soon I was lost in my own world, in my own heaven.

Bella. We were on her bed, where we had already spent a few nights studying. Except there weren't any books. Just us. Her hair flowed like a stream around her head and shone brightly in the light. Her beauty astounds me. She smiled at me, her perfect lips spread across her white teeth. And her eyes. They sparkled like fucking diamonds. She's perfect and beautiful and gorgeous and everything I don't deserve to have. Her skin shone like crystal in the light and it's just so perfect and flawless.

Over the past few days, we had become closer than I thought possible. She still thought of us a friends, but I felt so strongly about her that she consumed my every thought. I continued to play. For hours. I just sat there and played everything I felt and it felt amazing. I felt sorry for my dad that he'd never know that feeling. After a few hours, I couldn't play anymore. My limbs felt numb as I walked back upstairs to my bedroom. I'm not really sure how, but somehow I was safe again in the confines of my room. I couldn't even think. My head was swimming and my pulse pounded in my ears. I couldn't breathe. I needed air.

Without even taking a moment to process, my hand reached for my phone and I flipped it open, dialing blindly. It rang.

"Hello?"

"Bella."

I barely recognized my voice as I croaked out her name. Such a beautiful name deserved to be said with more conviction.

"Edward! What's wrong? No, never mind. I'm coming over. Just stay in your room, OK? Please don't leave."

And she hung up. I don't fucking deserve her. As if I could ever leave her again. As if I could survive more than five miles from her.

**I don't know about you, but I'm really excited for the next chapter!!!! Please review and tell me what you think should happen. I love hearing your ideas.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Here you go...that moment you've all been waiting for....**

I heard her beat up old truck pull into my driveway, the crunch of gravel giving away her distance as she finally came to a stop in front of my house. I still couldn't breathe. My chest ached and my lungs felt like they were on fire. If this is what suffocation feels like, I'd rather be burned alive. I heard the door to her truck slam and then nothing for a moment, and then the opening of my front door.

She had been friends with Alice long enough to know to just come in. Ringing the door bell will just get you my angry father in your face. Fuck. My pulse pounded in my ears and I could literally feel my veins throb with each passing of my heart beats. I knew that if I opened my eyes I'd vomit. Migraines after a fight with Carlisle are a common occurrence. So my eyes were squeezed shut so tightly that I wasn't sure if I'd be able to open them again. I heard her light footsteps on my stairs and then each stride as she walked down the hall to my bedroom.

Since we had come to an agreement, or more like since she agreed to be my friend, she had only been in my bedroom once. And it was the night I had come home. Now, I wasn't sure what to expect from her. She wasn't very comfortable in my room and certainly not while I was sprawled on the bed like a handful of sticks. We hadn't even touched each other yet. Not a handshake, not a pat on the back, nothing. And now I expected her to come to my side and take away my pains? She'd probably take one look at me and walk back out. Shit.

"Edward? Are you OK?"

Her sweet voice filled my ears and drowned out the pulsing drum I had been listening to for the past three hours. I had checked my watch. I had played the piano for three hours. No wonder I couldn't feel my fingers. I couldn't open my eyes. But I felt her. I knew exactly where she was. My skin crawled with anticipation and I felt my fingertips twitch for the first time in a few hours.

"Can you turn off the light? It hurts."

I whispered at her, probably confusing the hell out of her in the process, and sat up very slowly. Yep, definitely scared her. I heard the light switch click.

"Thanks. Can you shut the blinds? Please?"

Another whisper. If I spoke any louder I'd pass out. I couldn't handle that much noise pollution. I listened for her footsteps and sighed gratefully when I heard the whoosh of air made by the blinds dropping. It was safe. I cracked an eye open and sagged my shoulders. Bella was standing by the window, her hair down and perfectly tousled, just like always. It didn't shine in the light like it normally does, because there was barely any light in the room, but it still looked...just perfect. I need to find a new adjective for her but I can't think of one that fits as well. Those tight low-rise jeans that left a bit of her stomach exposed, they made it hard to think clearly. And she wore that shirt again, the blue one she wore the first day in Biology that made her skin look like milk.

"Hi."

I whispered again, unsure of my noise tolerance as of yet.

"Hey."

She whispered back. Her voice is still melodic, even rough with whisper. I moved my self so that I was leaning against the headboard, leaving her room on the bed to sit. I looked to her first and then to the empty spot, resting my forearms on my bent knees, my hands hanging down with defeat. I had thoroughly exhausted them. Unsure and reluctant, my Bella took careful steps and approached my bed. She gently sat down as if her weight would truly dip the mattress. She must weigh around one-hundred and fifteen pounds, soaking wet. Once on the bed she folded her legs beneath her and watched me, unsure of what to do.

"Y-your voice was so...scary on the phone. Are you OK?"

I sighed and closed my eyes. She needs to know why I need her. I took a deep breath, inhaling her scent as I did so. Strawberries and freesia. Fucking stunning. It was the first breath I had taken in a few hours that didn't hurt. My lungs finally filled to capacity and my capillaries filled with oxygen. I need her to breathe. It's just that simple. Having her so close to me was a sure test of my self-control but I'd rather struggle with that than not see her at all.

"I had a fight with my dad. And I just needed someone to talk to."

I didn't add that she was the reason I hadn't yet passed out from oxygen deprivation. I'd save that stalker shit for later. Bella rose up off her butt and onto her knees, inching herself closer until she could see my face in the dark. I looked into her eyes, longing for the feeling of keeping eye contact with her. I used to feel guilty about it but now I'm addicted and I'm a selfish bastard. I don't care if I'm taking more than I'm giving. I need to have her with me.

"Edward, I'm so sorry. Alice told me you guys don't get along."

"Pft. Get along? Sometimes when we fight I think one of us will end up in a body bag."

I watched her narrow her eyes and purse her lips, her thinking expression. She looked down at my comforter to search for the words she wanted to use.

"I honestly can't tell you that I know how you feel. I wish I could, but I don't. Do you want to tell me what you fought about? Maybe it'll feel better to let someone else hear your side?"

I nodded. She's probably right. No, she is. She's always right. She knows exactly what to say, when to say it, and how to say it.

"Well, my dad is a doctor. But you knew that. He's had this dream of me becoming a doctor ever since I was born. 'Another man to carry on the family name.' But I don't want that. I don't want to go to medical school, to be a doctor. I hate it. I've tried to like it. I've gone to work with him and sat in on some classes at a few universities. I still don't want to do it. I want to write music. Maybe I'll be a musician, I don't know. But I just want to write music. And he can't handle that.

He says it's not a real job. I'm not a man if I can't support my family comfortably. He just won't listen. He doesn't care what I want and he doesn't care if I'm happy. We've been having this fight since I was thirteen and it get's old, you know?"

I finished my little rant with a heavy sigh, running my fingers through my hair. I realized then that through the entire thing, Bella had never let her gaze falter from mine. Like she truly wanted to hear what I had to say. I had never met a girl that did that and it made my heart flutter. I didn't let go of her eyes either. I would never.

"I'm sorry. That sounds very difficult. I don't know what to tell you other than that I'm here for you...if you need someone to talk to. I mean..I know you called me already, and I'm here, on your bed, in your room, bu-"

"Thank you, Bella. You don't know how much it means to me."

I smiled softly at her and watched as the panic left her face. Saying out loud that she was on my bed in my room, in the dark no less, was worse than just thinking it. It made it more real, as if I could ever forget this. That she was here for me when I needed her most and she had listened to me when I didn't think anybody else could. She just understands me and she listens, actually listens, not just hears. There's a difference, you see, between listening and hearing. She can do both but with me, she listens.

"I mean it, Bella. You mean so much to me. I didn't even think twice when I called you. I needed someone and I just called you."

Her face was so close to mine, while she searched for my eyes in the dark. So fucking close, yet I couldn't touch her. But the electrical current was stronger than ever. We had never been so close before. She's so beautiful. Absolutely stunning. Every part of her is perfect and right and good. And I need her so badly it hurts to breathe on my own. I needed to breathe in her sweet breath.

"You mean a lot to me, too. I wouldn't have come if I wasn't your friend. I'm actually really surprised at how well this is working out. I didn't know you had it in you, but I really like talking to you."

She said it again. Friend.

"Bella. I know we're supposed to be friends, and that I'm not supposed to be feeling other things. But I can't help it. You move me and you make me want you in ways I have never thought possible."

Her breath caught in her throat. I didn't hear it, I felt it. She had moved even closer to me on the bed and we were both leaning forward, extending our necks so that our breath mingled between us in a sweet tangle. My lips tingled. I needed to taste her. She needs to taste me and see how much she affects me.

"Edward.."

"I can't help it anymore. I never wanted to just be your friend. I can't. You're too perfect."

We inched even closer. I looked up to see her eyes had closed and her lips were parted gently in a small, perfectly symmetrical 'o'. So fucking beautiful. Her soft tongue came out slightly to wet her lips as her breathing became more rapid but just as soft and quiet.

"Edward..."

"I need you and me to be an us. I can't stand it anymore to just be your friend. I've finally found the person I want to give myself to and I can't. Bel-"

"Shut up and kiss me, Edward."

My heart was beating at a dangerous rate and I felt my pulse again. But it was a good thing this time. It meant I was alive and she had jump started my heart. Her voice had been no more than a tiny whisper but I took it just as if she had screamed in my face. Don't have to tell me twice. I closed my eyes and brought a hand up to her face, cupping her cheek gently so that my thumb rested on her cheekbone and my other fingers were behind her ear, caressing her gorgeous skin. A fire burned in my stomach. Her skin was softer than I had imagined. It was smooth as silk and felt just as beautiful as it looked. I would have plenty of fuel for those wet dreams she had induced recently. Slowly, so as not to scare her with my eagerness, I pulled our faces just inches apart. I could taste her breath. Closer still, until our lips were literally, one millimeter apart. So close.

"Eduardo! Time to go!"

I screamed in pain as the lights shot on and the door was kicked open with a loud bang against the wall. Bella jumped back from me so fast she almost fell off the bed and I jumped back so fast I knocked my temple against the headboard.

"Fuck."

"Oh....what is this? Hm? You make sexy time with Bella?"

I had my eyes squeezed shut but I didn't have to open them to know who the intruder was. Fucking Emmett. I hate him. I hate him so much I could kill him. He was doing a perfect impression of Borat and I wanted to kill him. Slowly and carefully, I opened my eyes. First I looked at Bella. Her stunning face was beat red and there was a slim layer of tears glossing over her gorgeous brown eyes. No. I groaned and stood up. My eyes went to Emmett. The buffoon was wearing gym clothes, basketball shorts and a tee shirt, and had already grabbed my bag from the closet. He had the biggest shit eating grin on his face that I had ever seen. His massive biceps were folded across his massive chest and I wish I was as strong as he was. Because I'd beat the living shit out of him.

"Get the fuck out."

"What's up, vanilla face? You make sexy time with Bella? Number-four prostitute in whole of Kazakhstan?"

I saw red. How dare he fucking talk about her like that, even if he was doing that stupid Borat impression.

"Get. Out."

"Fine, fine. I'll wait in the car."

And he left, closing the door behind him. I had completely forgotten to call him and tell him I couldn't go. Why me? Why fucking me? Bella. I turned back to look at her. Her slender arms were wrapped around her middle and she was hunched slightly, looking at the floor.

"Bella..."

"I should go."

Her face was so red. Her beautiful blush normally made me smile but this level of embarrassment made me hurt and ache for her. I felt so horrible for what had happened. Emmett ruined my fucking life. And I'm not being dramatic. She stood quickly and sidestepped me to leave the room, brushing my arm with hers in the process. I fucking hate Emmett. And me head hurt more than it ever had in my entire life. I ran to the garbage can as I felt the contents of my stomach come up and out.

**I'm sorry, I am. Don't worry, I'll fix it! Please review!!!**


	12. Chapter 12

**I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to post. Life kind of sucks sometimes, ya know? Thank you for being patient!**

Bella hadn't returned my calls all weekend. I called her four times on Saturday and six times on Sunday. I left messages each time. I practically begged her to call me back, or even text me. But she hadn't. Alice said she hadn't heard from her either. She figured it was because she was embarrassed, but she had called her just as much as I did.

So when I got into the car to go to school, the first thing I did was check my phone to see if Bella had called me in the time it took to walk from my bedroom out to my car. No. Fuck. I turned the engine over and drove to school, much faster than I should have. I always drive fast. I average about ninety, regardless of the speed limit. I can't fucking stand it when people drive slow. I made Jasper pull over once so we could switch seats. His car is fast as hell, too. I don't understand how he can do anything under 110 in that baby.

Walking down the long hallway was hell. My heart was beating furiously in my chest and my breaths were coming out in quick pants that got me a few odd stares from some kids. They had been staring at me a lot lately, probably because I'd stopped fucking around. Being with Bella, even if it was just a friendship, made me want to stay away from other girls. I had no desire to roll around the floor of a truck just for a quick release. These girls couldn't even get me off, anyway. I looked at them as I walked, leaning against their lockers with a flirty twinkle in their eye. Like I want them, like they can attract me with their tiny little denim skirts and their even tinier tank tops. That one that was always staring at me, Mike's little friend, Jessica or something. Her shirt was so low you could see the top of her bra. Fucking disgusting.

"Hello, Edward!"

Everything came back into focus when I felt a set of hands go to my chest and stop me in my tracks. I looked up from the floor, at the feet first, and then up. Hot pink sandals with a stupidly high heel, matching hot pink toenail polish. Up further, slender calves stopped abruptly by knobby knees with purple bruises. Way too much thigh showing with a scrap of frilly pink fabric, then a belly button ring showing from through a white tank top. And then a mile of cleavage. Finally the face. Laurie, or whatever her name is. She was smiling at me, that flirty smile that suggests she'd rather be somewhere else without any clothing on. Fucking disgusting.

"I haven't seen you in a while. Where have you been?"

I took both of her hands in mine, pulling them away from my chest, and placed them at her sides. Don't fucking touch me. She's disgusting. Just looking at her, I'm not quite sure what I ever found attractive. She's fake. Her makeup is caked on and if it wasn't there is no way in hell she'd be even remotely attractive.

"Oh, uh..busy."

"We should hang out. Like now. I know you never go to Biology and then you have gym after that so you can skip it. And then after that you have a free period. It'll be perfect! We can have the entire first half of the day to just be together."

Christ, she knows me schedule? I don't even know my schedule. My fucking god is she disgusting.

"Look, Laura, I have to go."

She huffed or something as I sidestepped passed her. I think she stomped her foot. I'm not sure. I was only thinking about one thing. My Bella. She would be in class, only twenty feet away, and she would have to talk to me. We couldn't ignore this. I need her more than anything. We were almost there, so close. But then fucking Emmett had to ruin it. I almost kissed her. I'll never forget how potent her scent was when we were that close. God, I couldn't think of anything else. And her skin. She's so soft and warm. Like a heating pad. You know, the one that you use when you're sick. So fucking warm and perfect. So, so perfect.

I finally reached my class and stepped into the doorway. Oh, yeah. She's here. My skin felt on fire and the electricity shot through me like a bolt of lightening. It hurt. My chest contracted and my skin felt too tight. I needed her. This feeling wouldn't go away until I touched her again. I looked to our lab table. There she was. So beautiful. Her gorgeous, shiny hair created a curtain between us so that I couldn't see her face but surely my memory wouldn't do her any justice. She's so perfect. She had on a pair of some sort of exercise pants. Black, tight in the hip and thigh and made out of an elastic type of fabric. Yoga pants? Is that what Alice calls them? Whatever.

They make her legs look nine miles long and her butt look really round. So beautiful. And she had on a long shirt. It looked like the blue one except this one is pink, light pink. And it's a little see-through so she had on a white tank top underneath. What the hell had gotten into her? I mean, she looked so beautiful and...sexy. But Bella would never put this together. It's far too tight. Every day I've seen her she had on jeans and a tee shirt or a sweatshirt. She looked gorgeous in anything. I grabbed my bearings and walked towards our table. 'Get it together, Cullen! Don't let her leave here without you!' I know, I know.

I got closer to her and her scent enveloped me. It reminded me what I was fighting for. Her perfection, her smile, her laughter, her everything. She didn't look up, even as she heard my footsteps. I sat down. Her hair covered both sides of her face and her hands cradled her cheeks.

"B-Bella?"

Please talk to me. Please, please, please. I had grown so accustomed to hearing her voice every day. We talked about everything. School, books we liked, what we wanted to do with our future, our family. I even told her about all of my embarrassing stories. She asked, of course, but I told her. She asked so many questions, like she genuinely wanted to know about me. And it made my heart throb for her. She knew everything about me now.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I really am. I'm sorry. I know I hurt you, and I told you I never would. But I did. And I'm so sorry."

My voice sounded like it belonged to a boy going through puberty. It definitely cracked twice. Her head snapped up then and her hair blew behind her shoulders, wafting more of her glorious scent in my direction. My chest ached. I needed to touch her again. She's so perfect. Her twinkling brown eyes widened to the size of oranges first, then furrowed, creating a little crease in her brow. I wanted to kiss it. Her lips pursed. I wanted to kiss them. And then she blushed. Oh my fucking god. She blushed. Her cheeks turned a dusty pink and it gave her the most beautiful flush, so sexy and lively. I needed to kiss her. I needed to feel my lips on hers, to feel what her lips are like. I was so close, so fucking close. Please say something, my Bella.

"Edward, you didn't hurt me."

I groaned quietly. It felt so good to hear her voice. I felt a little of the pressure rise off of my lungs and I took a deep breath. Does she not understand how much I need her?

"What do you mean? You wouldn't talk to me for days."

She blushed again. I groaned again. She's so fucking beautiful.

"Oh, Edward. You didn't do anything...wrong...I just..."

She looked down again and fiddled with the pen resting in the crook of her notebook. I waited. I'd wait forever. I just needed to hear her voice again. Explain to me what it is I had done wrong, so I could never do it again. Ever. She looked up then, as if she could hear my silent pleading. I locked eyes with her as she did so. I could get lost in them. They're so deep and perfect. My heart thundered in my chest.

"I was just so embarrassed, Edward. I am embarrassed."

"W-why? Because of Emmett? I'm sorry about him. He just doesn't-"

"No, not about Emmett. I'm glad Emmett came in."

My heart was officially crushed. She didn't want to kiss me. She wanted Emmett to interrupt us. I looked away. I felt mortified. Of course she knew she was too good for me. Of course I could never get the perfect girl. I sighed.

"Can I ask why?"

"I almost kissed you, Edward!"

Her tone of voice elevated and she almost squeaked out my name. The thought was really that terrible? My pain must have showed on my face because her eyes softened. She has such a good heart. I almost violated her and here she is, feeling sorry for me. Figures. She's perfect. I think I've mentioned that.

"I didn't mean it like that. It's just, I never thought I'd be that girl that kissed guys like you. We're not even together. I feel like such a...a...slut!"

She let out an exasperated sigh and buried her face in her hands, gripping her hair tightly and shaking her head in frustration. Oh. So if we were together, it would have been alright? My heart leapt and I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face. I must have looked like a crazy person. Good thing we were alone in the room. I quickly adjusted myself and put my somber face back on. 'Time to get serious. The moment you've been waiting for.' Oh, yeah. Right.

"So, if we were together...like.._together_, you'd be OK if I kissed you?"

BPOV

My fingers knotted in my hair roughly. I had never felt like this before! Why does it feel so...so...confusing? He's a friend, just a friend! I vowed I'd never let myself get this way. Poor Jessica. Did he do this to her, too? Did he make her see double when he walked into a room? Did his heady scent make her heart beat faster and slower at the same time? It must be me. I'm a freak. But he's just so perfect! I can't help it. He make me forget everything that I've ever promised myself. He makes me forget all of those times I saw my mother crying in pain from her boyfriends. He makes me think that maybe people can have relationships. Maybe. I sighed again and shook my head. No. He doesn't want me. I'm the last one he wants. I won't even kiss him! But he's so different now. I know him now and he's not like the boy he was. He's just so misunderstood.

"So, if we were together...like.._together_, you'd be OK if I kissed you?"

My head shot up at the sound of his voice. Would it be OK? Well, yes. I mean, I wouldn't be a slut then. Kissing boys out of nowhere, just because I felt like it. But, oh. I wanted to kiss him, so badly. So badly. I wanted to feel his lips on mine. I bet they're soft and sweet, almost as sweet as his breath against my tongue while we were so close.

"Um, well, yes?"

He looked me in the eye. He has the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. They're so clear and green and bright. I feel like I'm seeing directly into his soul. I can almost read him like that. His eyes are so expressive, and his eye lashes are so long. I just want to throw myself into his arms. They look so safe and strong. And his chest. Even under his shirt I could see that it's perfectly sculpted and chiseled. Just like the rest of his body. We hadn't touched except for our almost kiss, but it's easy to see how gorgeous he is. Alice told me he works out. Alice. Ugh. I suddenly felt self-conscious again. This outfit she put me in made me look like a street walker. She had the nerve to take my clothing and donate it to the poor! She replaced it, with what she thinks is better, but still. My clothes are gone. And I feel like Lauren. He's so beautiful. His tongue darted out to wet his lips, his finger tugging at the collar of his tee shirt. A tiny bead of sweat trickled down his forehead and he cleared his throat.

"Edward?"

He looked at me again and grinned slightly, though it didn't meet his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"N-nothing. Um, Bella. I have to ask you something."

Anything. Just don't die. Maybe he's going to pass out. I looked at him, eagerly waiting for what is was that he had to say. Hell, it must be something good. He's at least trying to get it out before he dies.

"W-would you, um.."

He cleared his throat and looked me in the eye again.

"Would you be my..um...would you be with me? Be my girlfriend, Bella?"

Oh! My heart raced a million times a minute and my breath got lost somewhere between my lungs and my mouth. I couldn't breathe. And it shocked me, because I had never felt more happy in my entire life. Edward Cullen wants me? I smiled. I felt it reach ear to ear and I couldn't help it. I had dreamed of being with him, fantasized in class. I hadn't paid attention in Biology since the day I met him. I couldn't think of anything else but him. All day and all night. I needed him more than I needed food or water.

"Yes, Edward. I'd love to be your girlfriend."

And he smiled. He has the most beautiful smile. It makes my heart flutter and my stomach tumble. I needed to touch it. I found my fingers dancing at my sides and I reached up to press a fingers to his lips, gliding it across his smile. My finger tip tingled. It felt amazing. I wish I could feel his lips with my own. My body moved on its own accord. I wasn't even aware of myself as I leaned closer, closing the distance between us. His smile faded as my finger dropped and he grew serious, his gaze resting on my lips. The tip of my tongue slipped out and grazed my bottom lip. I stared at his, and watched as he did the same. I leaned closer and my eyelids drooped, closing so that I could just barely see him. But I felt him lean closer, and I smelled his breath. It's so sweet. Sort of tangy. We were so close. His eyes closed, the tip of my nose brushed his. And then the bell rang.

"Shit."

I couldn't agree more. So much for that.

**I'm sorry, again. But at least they're together now! Please review :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Thank you so much for the reviews! They were fabulous, as usual. But one in particular had me on the floor laughing, *cough* xBookButterflyX. Don't you worry, they will get their MWAHMWAH on soon haha. Enjoy :) **

"Lookin' a little flabby there, Edmund. But I guess that's just what happens when you don't go to the gym with your two best friends anymore because you're too busy with your new girlfriend that can't kiss you with the lights on because you're too ugly. But, that's just a guess. An educated guess, but a guess."

Emmett pinched the skin on my arm. Pretty fucking hard, too. And I am not flabby. There is nothing about me that isn't rock hard. Including my main man of the south, because instead of concentrating on the video game I was playing with Jasper and Emmett, I was thinking about Bella. I sighed and proceeded to cut Jasper's head off, in the game of course. He's my sane friend. I need to keep him.

"We didn't get to kiss, first of all. You ruined it. Second, it was dark because I had a migraine from fighting with Dr. Dickhead. I didn't want to vomit all over Bella so I had her turn the lights off and the shades down."

And then I cut Emmett's head off. In the game, but I wish it was in real life. How the fuck does he manage to open the door, excuse me...kick open the door, just as I was about to kiss her? I could have killed him. And then in class, the bell rings and students start pouring in. If she was embarrassed about being seen by Emmett, then I could only imagine what she would feel like if the entire class caught us. But her blush surely would have been beautiful. She's so beautiful. Her hair is always shiny and so fucking soft. I run my fingers through it all the time. She laughs and tells me it's fine, but I'm sure I make her uncomfortable. I just can't help it. She's so soft all over. When I hold her hand in the hallway my fingertips dance over the back of her hand and I get lost in how smooth it is. Even after a week of dating, we really hadn't gotten to much more than that. Every time I'd do something she'd panic and ask if she was being too easy. But I will wait. I will wait until the day that I die because she is worth it. She is worth waiting, fighting, and dying for. And I fucking need her like I need the air I breathe.

"Mother. Fucker. I'm out. Edward just killed me last dude."

I smirked and shrugged, going after the monster that Emmett was playing for the last time.

"Sorry, Jasper. Have to be faster. Now, get on your knees, bitch. Because I'm coming for you."

"That's what she said!"

I heard Jasper groan next to me. Emmett had yet to grow out of that phase. Every once in a while he'd answer, 'your mom' and it would remind us that he has the mind of a ten year-old sometimes.

"Hey! Speaking of bitches on their knees, have you and Bella done the nasty yet?"

I rolled my eyes and switched weapons. I'm not using a gun on Emmett. He will die slowly and painfully. A dagger. Much better.

"Don't talk about her that way. And no. Not that it's any of your business, Emmett."

"Like hell it isn't! You haven't seen us in a fucking week, Edward. What the hell? Bro's_ before _ho's, dude."

"She's not a ho, Jasper, and if you call her that again I'll cut off your head and shit in the hole. And I have so seen you. I eat lunch with you every day."

No sooner had I gotten the words out when I felt a sharp pain in my side, specifically between my ribs so that I felt it all the way in my stomach. Mother fucker. My controller dropped to the floor and I rolled onto my side, clutching the spot where I had been assaulted. It felt like I'd been shot. Fucking Jasper. He's the one that practices on the punching bag at the gym while Emmett and I are on weights. It hurt to breathe and I thought I saw stars.

"You aren't actually paying attention. You only sit with us because she goes home before lunch. And you would go with her if you had as many free periods as she does. Your mind goes with her, though. It's not the same as actually being there, Edward. Fuck."

I looked up, leaning my head back so I could see behind me. Emmett and Jasper were both sitting on the floor, their backs against the couch, knees bent and forearms resting on top. Fuck. I sat up, wincing as I straightened. He really knows how to punch. I was beginning to think that he had wedged a knife between my ribs. The pain subsided slightly as I leaned back against the television, my head falling back to rest on the television. I sighed.

"I'm sorry."

"It's not like I'm just being a bitch. We..."

I looked up, Jasper was running his fingers through his hair. The pain in my side felt numb compared to the pressure on my chest. I hadn't realized how little time I had spent with them. Bella just consumed my every waking moment. How could she not? She's perfect. Jasper shook his head.

"Until you ran away, we've never spent so much time apart. Now this girl comes along and you've completely gone ape shit. You run away for two weeks, then spend the next week sulking because you aren't together, and now you _are_ together and you're still gone."

"You're with your girlfriends all the time. I'm not allowed?"

"We're with our girlfriends_ together_, dickhead. To-ge-ther."

"Because you're fucking his sister and he's fucking mine!"

I don't know what happened but something in me snapped. My tone was nastier than I thought it would be. They fucking pissed me off. I'm not allowed to be happy? So unless Emmett has a sister I don't know about, it's not going to work out the way they want it to.

"You're so fucking stupid for someone so smart. We don't isolate ourselves and forget our friends, Edward. You do."

"So what do you propose? Hm? Are you going to adopt Bella into your family, make her a Hale, so I'll fit in better?"

"No! Bring her along, invite us, what-the-fuck-ever. Just don't forget us!"

Emmett slammed his fists down on the floor beside him before springing up and heading to the kitchen, his feet pounding on the hardwood like bricks. He's like an elephant. I looked at Jasper His eyes were glued to the floor, his mouth a tight line. He unclenched then clenched his jaw a few times before sighing and looking up at me.

"His dad had a stroke on Wednesday. He was in the hospital for a day and then he came home. He's fine, but Emmett's pretty scared it'll happen again."

My mouth went dry. How did I not know this?

"Why didn't someone tell me? You, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett?"

"You weren't there to tell."

"I was so there! I was sitting right next to him the entire week!"

"But you weren't_ there_."

He growled the last part out and stood up. He shook his head and muttered to himself as he headed for the stairs to Rosalie's room, where Alice was. I got up to go to the kitchen. My chest felt heavy. I hadn't been there for my best friend when he needed me. I'm such a fuck up. When I walked in Emmett was leaning against the counter with his hands gripping the edges of the granite. His shoulders were bunched around his ears and it looked as if he was fighting hard to keep control.

"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry, Emmett. I can't believe I wasn't there and I can't make that up to you. Ever. I'm just sorry."

His shoulders dropped a bit but he didn't turn around, just nodded slightly.

"He's ok but they say it's more likely he'll get another one in the near future."

I stepped forward and stood next to him. I turned so that my back was leaning against the counter and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Have you spoken to Carlisle? He might be able to answer some questions."

I hate my dad, but he's an amazing doctor. Award winning even.

"Yeah. He told me to not worry because of how healthy he is. But how can he be healthy if he got one in the first place, you know?"

I gave him a sympathetic nod when he looked up. It takes a lot to shake Emmett and the look in his eyes let me know how serious he was. And I let him down. Fuck.

"We should go to the beach house we fixed up with your dad, take him to sit on the porch."

We hadn't been there since we were fourteen. It was a summer project we did together. He's such a hands-on man so it seemed like the perfect way to spend two months. It was a shit hole when he bought it. The siding was falling off and the floors were hardly stable. But we worked on it together and I'll never forget how much fun we had. Fuck. I sound like such a bitch. He looked up at me and smiled slightly, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"He uh, can't leave the house. But I wouldn't mind taking a trip up since we have a four-day weekend. All of us."

I didn't miss the meaning in his voice. My presence was mandatory. I nodded. We'd need to leave right after school the very next day. It's about a four hour drive.

"Yeah. Do you think that maybe...."

"Of course, Edward. As long as you're there."

He slapped my shoulder and his smile widened. And then he was off, to tell the rest of the crew the news upstairs. He really was just truly happy that we would be together again. I fucking love my friends. I smirked to myself and grabbed my phone out of my pocket, dialing blindly.

"Hello?"

Her voice made me smile. My heart started to flutter.

"Hey, Bella."

"Edward! I was just thinking about you. I miss you."

"I miss you, too. I'm just at Emmett's."

"Oh. What's up? When are you going to be home?"

"Uh, I'm crashing here tonight but I want to tell you something."

"Yeah, sure. What is it?"

"So, tomorrow...we're leaving for a little trip, for the weekend. We're going to Emmett's beach house right after school and staying for the long weekend."

"Oh. OK."

Her voice sounded disappointed so I quickly recovered.

"Oh, Bella. I'm inviting you. I want you to come."

She didn't answer me for a few moments.

"Like with all of you? Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie?"

"And Alice."

"Oh."

"It'll be fine, Bella. They'll love you. And I want you there. It'll be great. It's about time we all hung out, anyway."

"Um, for four days?"

"Yeah. It'll be really fun. And....if you don't go.....I'm going to miss you too much. Please, Bella. For me?"

That was dirty. But I never said I fought fair. She sighed.

"I'd love to go. But only because I'll miss you as well."


	14. Chapter 14

**I caused a bit of confusion last chapter I think. I contradicted myself when Edward told Bella he was at Emmett's house and then Jasper went to Rosalie's room. Rosalie doesn't have a room at Emmett's lol. They were at Jasper's. Sorry for the mix up! Good catch for those you saw it. **

**OK, so we're going to shake things up a bit, give you a little Bella in this one. I think this is a good chapter :)**

BPOV

"Are you ready?"

Crap. Ready as I'll ever be. I just smiled and nodded slightly as he came towards me, taking my heavy backpack from my shoulder and slinging it over his. He does things like that often. Opens doors, pulls out chairs, stands when I get up from the table, carries my books. I thought it was corny at first but I really like it now. It makes me remember that he's different. I sighed to myself as he flashed me his perfectly crooked grin at my response. I'm not sure if I have ever seen him this excited, except when I agreed to be his girlfriend. Could this weekend really be that important to him? Yes. I'm going to be spending four whole days with his friends. My stomach turned into a knot as I thought about it.

Jasper scares me. He always looks like he's in pain, like he can't stand to be around anybody but his friends. And then Emmett is just...huge. His size is just intimidating and he's so loud. I'm afraid he'll run over me and not even realize. Ugh, and Rosalie. I don't think she has ever smiled before. Ever. Not once. There's no way she wasn't born with a permanent pout. But regardless, she's gorgeous. She's pissed off and still manages to make me feel ugly. Well, I am. So it doesn't take much. Thank the lord Alice will be there. She's my only saving grace, except for Edward. I can't believe how close I've gotten to her in such a short amount of time. It's like she just understands me and I understand her. We click.

And Edward. He still makes my insides turn to butterflies. Every time I see him I get this tingly feeling all over, like I'm being electrocuted, but in a good way. It happens whenever we're close enough. Like now. His musky, masculine smell wafted around my head, sending me into a frenzy. I fought to keep my hands to myself. The last thing I need is to throw myself at Edward Cullen and become a total slut. Then I'd be just like every other girl he's been with. I am not any other girl, and Edward is not that guy anymore.

We walked to his car in the school parking lot. He opened my door for me and then buckled my seat belt, smiling into my eyes the entire time as he reached over and felt for the buckle. I almost passed out from being so close to him. I can't handle it. He's so beautiful. I stared back into his eyes and my breath caught in my throat. They're so green, like a leaf. But they're deep, three-dimensional. I get lost in them every chance I get. It feels like I'm looking right into his soul and I remember why I agreed to be with him. He makes me feel like....I don't know. I've never felt like this before. I need him like I need the air I breathe. I want to kiss him so badly.

I want to taste his lips. I bet they're sweeter than any candy I've ever tasted. It would fit. Everything about him is perfect. He is truly perfect. I didn't think it was possible, but I ache for him. I can't sleep at night and when I finally do relax enough, I'm dreaming about him. I felt my body move on its own accord and lean closer to him. I could smell his mint breath. So close. My eyes started to close. He caught it and stopped his movements. My eyes opened again. We stared at each other for a long moment. Please just kiss me. I need to taste you. The tip of my tongue darted out to wet my lips.

But he clamped his eyes shut and sucked in a breath before quickly clicking the belt in and moving away from me. He was so close, and then he was gone. He shut my door. I wish I could figure out what he was thinking. I felt my face get hot and I looked down at my hands. How could I think that he wanted to kiss me? I practically begged for it and he just closed his eyes and pulled away. Of course he wouldn't want to kiss me. Of all the girls he's been with, I'm the worst looking one. I must repulse him. At least I know our relationship isn't about sex. He would never want to have sex with me. By the time he walked around to his side of the car, I had managed to regain a small fraction of my composure. I couldn't look at him. Embarrassed isn't strong enough of a word to describe what I felt. Mortification. That's it. I had presented myself to him again, for the third time, and he hadn't taken it. First, was in his room. He wanted to kiss me then. Second, was in Biology when he asked me to be his girlfriend. He wanted to kiss me then, as well. But now, I guess he finally realized how awful I am.

He got into the car silently and looked over at me, I could feel it. But I couldn't look at him. It would just hurt too much to see his milky white skin, graced with a slight five o'clock shadow, the chiseled line of his jaw and perfect angles of his nose and brow. It would hurt to see how perfect he is in comparison to me. I'm so stupid. As if he could ever want me. This four days would be hard if I didn't get past this. I know we are connected. I can feel it. I just have to accept that our relationship won't be physical as well. Hey, then he can't just ditch me the morning after, right? I accepted my rejection. I just wouldn't try again. Edward must have sensed the shift because I looked over to see that he had relaxed as well. His knuckles became the same color as the rest of his hands as he released his white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel. I hadn't realized I repulsed him that much.

In the week that we had been officially together, we had developed the most intense relationship that I ever had with another person. It's beyond friendship, beyond respect, and beyond boyfriend. He makes me feel like I can keep going and keep breathing. From what he's told me, it's the same for him. I can see it in his perfectly green eyes when he looks at me. I can feel it when we're close enough. It's like this gravitational pull. Even if we're in the same room, we need to be close, almost touching. But we haven't even touched each other really. We held hands in the hallways at school but that's it. I don't know why. He has tried to touch me before but I don't think he truly wants to. I think he does it because that's what he's used to doing with girls. He doesn't want me the same way. So I always freak out because I think I'm being just as easy as those other girls. I'm so confused all the time. I want him but I can't give myself up and get hurt. I know, confusing. Trust me when I tell you I'm having a hard time understanding it, too. It makes my head hurt.

But I accept it. But I'll wait until he really does want me for me, not to fulfill some duty he thinks is necessary. Because if he doesn't want a physical relationship with me, I will wait. I'd wait forever just to know what he tastes like. Because he is worth waiting, fighting, and dying for.

"So, are you excited?"

Finally.

"Yeah. It's going to be fun. I mean, I'm nervous. But I'm excited to see the house you built."

He laughed and ran his fingers through his hair, that gorgeous smirk playing across his lips. I want to taste it.

"I didn't build it. I nailed some things in and drank all of the chocolate milk out of the cooler. Emmett and his dad did most of the work. Ok, Emmett's dad did all the work. We just farted and burped a lot, talked about the girls we thought were cute."

I laughed at that. I could just imagine a fourteen year-old Edward being a gross little boy going through puberty. I bet he was adorable. If he's this beautiful now, he surely was just as perfect younger. He smiled soundly as I laughed at him, embarrassed. But he recovered quickly. He doesn't like me to see him embarrassed.

"Uh...so, why are you nervous again?"

Oh, that.

"Um...well. I don't think your friends will like me."

He scoffed and shook his head.

"And why, my Bella, do you think they won't like you?"

"Jasper never speaks to me when you bring me to your lunch table. He just kind of looks and then looks away, and it looks like he's in pain. And Emmett won't talk to you when I'm there. It's only been once or twice but I notice. And then Rosalie..."

I shook my head and sighed. She hates me, despises me.

"Just ignore her. I do."

"Edward, she's your best friend's girlfriend and your other best friend's sister."

"I'm telling you, just ignore her."

I sighed and looked over at her. How can I ignore someone who I eventually have to get along with. It doesn't work. And frankly, she scares the hell out of me. She's intimidating. Not to mention to beautiful I can never even compare. Edward heard me sigh and took is eyes away from the road. He does that a lot. Usually at speeds excessing ninety miles per hour.

"What?"

"I can't ignore her. She knows she's better than me and she intimidates me."

"She is not better than you. At all. Not even close. Do you understand me?"

He looked intensely at me but I wasn't giving up.

"Edward, how can you say that when she is so clearly the most beautiful girl in our entire school? I'm just plain, and boring, and ugly compared to her."

It took him a second to process what I had said before I felt the car jerk to the right on the side of the road, skidding to a stop on the bumpy gravel of the shoulder. My hands instinctively shot out in front of me and grabbed the dashboard, my breathing coming out in short pants. The scenery outside seemed to be moving in a blur as we finally came to a halt. What. The. Hell. We had just gone from ninety to zero in all of five seconds and I think I got whip lash.

"E-Edw-"

"What did you just say, Bella?"

"What?"

"Before, about yourself. What did you say."

It wasn't a question. I looked over at him then and gasped silently at what I saw. His eyes bore into mine with such a fever that I hardly recognized him at all. He looked....horribly angry.

"I-I said that I'm plain, boring, and ugly."

Is that the right answer? I waited. He stared at me for a long time before closing his eyes and expelling a heavy breath through his nose while shaking his head slowly. Huh? I waited. His shoulders sagged and he opened his eyes again. They sparkled with a certain emotion that I couldn't put my finger on. His eyes looked the same as they had after he fought with his father. Hurt, angry, upset, frustrated. I wanted to take it all away but I knew I had caused it. I'm not sure why, but I had.

"Edward?"

"One fairer than my love? The all-seeing sun  
Ne'er saw her match since first the world begun."

And my heart stopped beating. He recited Romeo and Juliet again. I couldn't take it when he did that. Love, he said. Is that what this feels like?

EPOV

I don't know where the Shakespeare came from but it was the only way I could think to express to her how beautiful she is. How can my Bella think she is ugly or boring? She is anything but plain and it kills me that she thinks so low of herself. How can she not see that she is the most beautiful, perfect, gorgeous girl in the world? She is my world and she doesn't see it. My chest aches when I see her because I know that I will never be able to quench my thirst for her. I'm always thirsty and hungry for her. I don't know what will ever fix it. Being near her only subsides it for a while. I will never stop needing her.

I watched her for a moment. Something flashed over her eyes, and I'm not sure what, but they glistened. She held my eyes and I got lost in the depth of her chocolate ones. It amazes me how expressive they are. So warm and inviting, I lose myself in their complexity and I take it all in, whatever she will give me. I'd take anything at this point. I'm so desperate for her. We're close and together and we have a connection that can never be replicated but I still need more. I don't know what, but more. A kiss. I need to taste her. I could never do that to her, betray her trust like that. I will not be that guy that kisses his girlfriend for the first time in a car or in a classroom. She deserves so much more.

I waited. Usually when I recite Shakespeare to her she giggles and blushes. Fuck. She's so beautiful when she blushes. A sexy shade of pink tints her cheeks and I want to kiss them, feel the warmth of her blood rushing to the surface of her skin against my needy lips. She didn't move still, just held my eye contact, unblinking. And then I watched in horror as a single tear escaped her right eye and trickle down her porcelain cheek. Slowly, it dripped to her chin and rested there for a moment. I snapped. My hand shot out slowly and I softly used the back of my index finger to catch the tear and wipe the trail it left behind. Her skin felt like pure fire beneath my touch and I relished in the feeling I wasn't sure I'd be able to experience again any time soon.

"Bella, what's wrong?

Had I hurt her? Probably. I'm such an asshole, I really am. I always manage to ruin it. She's so perfect and I'm so wrong for her. Her blush deepened and she looked away, shaking her head while casting her eyes down.

"It just sounds so beautiful when you say things like that, Edward. You're too perfect."

She smiled slightly but didn't look up at me. I love it when she says my name. Me? Perfect? I couldn't believe what I was hearing. How could I, Edward Cullen, be considered perfect? I am everything that's wrong and bad and she is the only good and pure thing in this world.

"Bella, you seem to have things backwards."

She looked up then, and her eyes were lighter. She's so beautiful. I scanned her face, searching for something. I don't know what. Anything. I wish I could read her mind.

"You are perfect, Edward. I didn't expect you to change me so much, but you did. And I can't help but want to be around you all the time. I can't sleep without you in my dreams and I can't even breathe without you in my thoughts."

My breath caught in my throat. I was speechless. She had just described my feelings exactly and claimed them as her own. She can't possibly feel as strongly as I do, but the notion that she does feel something made my stomach jump and my heart race. I smiled. I grinned like a fool and I couldn't help it.

"I haven't stopped dreaming about you since the day I met you, and I'm not ashamed of it. And I know that I need you, more than anything."

And then she smiled. I groaned quietly. She has the most beautiful smile. I can't help but feel drawn to her. She's so fucking beautiful. It's unreal.

_"Ah! So horny..Ah! So horny...Ah! So horny...Me love you long time."_

I jumped as I heard my phone go off. Fuck. Perfect timing. And who's ring tone is that, do you ask? Take one guess. It starts with an Emm and ends with an Ett. Fucking perfect. I frantically searched my pockets as the song played on. I found it.

"WHAT!?"

"Christ, Edmundo. I was just asking where you were. You were supposed to be at Jasper's ten minutes ago and we want to hit the road."

"We're. Coming."

And I hung up. I felt my cheeks go red. Bella didn't need to hear that ring tone. It made me feel like such a pig.

"I'm sorry about that. They just wanted to know why we were late."

She smiled softly and rolled her eyes. She was used to Emmett's interruptions by now. I pulled out on the road and continued on.

"Edward?"

I looked over to see her eyes furrowed in question.

"What's my ring tone on your phone? I'm just curious, since Emmett's is so....bold."

I smirked and took her phone from her hand, finding my number in her phone book and then pressing the green 'call' button. After a few seconds, mine started to ring.

_"But on and on,  
From the moment I wake,  
To the moment I sleep,  
I'll be there by your side,  
Just you try and stop me,  
I'll be waiting in line,  
Just to see if you can_

Oh, did you want me to change?  
Well I'll change for good,  
And I want you to know, that you'll always get your way  
I wanted to say...

Don't you shiver  
Don't you shiver  
I'll sing it loud and clear  
And I'll always be waiting for you"

And the segment began to play again. The entire time my phone had been ringing I was looking at the road, but I could feel Bella looking at me. I turned to gauge her reaction. She blushed furiously, a gorgeous shade of pink, and looked down at her phone, ending the call.

"Is..that..OK?"

"It's perfect, Edward."

I smiled. We drove in a comfortable silence after that, neither of us needing to say more than we already had. I felt so content, like my heart was at ease for the first time in a while. She's so perfect. We got to Jasper's quickly. Really, because I drive like a maniac. I grabbed both of our bags that had remained packed in my trunk the entire day at school. We walked together towards the rest of the crew. They all groaned and I heard variations of 'Finally' and 'It's about time' from all of them. Fuckers. I felt Bella tense beside me. And I took her hand in mine, adjusting the bag over my right shoulder so that I had a free hand to take hers in. I would never leave her alone and I would never let her feel uncomfortable. Alice smiled once we got close enough.

"Bella, this is going to be so much fun! It's perfect! There are just the right number of bedrooms and Edward won't have to be by himself this time! I know it, we're going to have so much fun. Trust me."

**So how cute is Edward reciting Shakespeare? Letting his inner nerd come out a little. Sexy ;) They are in for an interesting vacation......**

**Please review! Favorite lines? Parts you hated?**


	15. Chapter 15

**Heh. So I had a bit of a hissy fit. Thank you all for the suggestions and words of encouragement. I have been known, on occasion, to act like a baby. But, in my defense, the chapter that got lost was 9,899 words long! Granted, this one is still 5,492, but that was a long ass chapter to lose! Now, enjoy :)**

We were only twenty minutes into our four hour trip and already, Emmett's life expectancy was plummeting fast. Why in the hell we had agreed to take one car is beyond me. Fucking Jasper. Of course, the practical one. 'It's a waste of gas to take multiple cars', he says. 'We're all going to the same place, anyway', he says. 'We can fit comfortably in my dad's Suburban', he says. 'You don't like to drive that long, anyway', he says. Fucking Jasper. Jasper and Alice were occupying the driver and passenger seats, Rosalie and Emmett in the second row, and then Bella and I were located in the third row. Normally, this would be fine. But with only the back of the seat to separate me and Bella from the gorilla and the bitch, my patience was wearing thin. I love him, I do. But, my god, is he annoying sometimes.

"So, which one of you brought the condoms? Hm? I bet Bella did. Flavored. I bet you're an animal in the sack. Ass up, face dow-"

"Emmett!"

Out of habit, my fist shot out in front of me and connected with the side of Emmett's head. Fucking asshole. Bella shifted in the seat next to me and looked down at her lap uncomfortably. I had yet to let go of her hand since we got out of my car. I sighed and looked over at Bella. Her face was as bright as a tomato. I love it when she blushes, but not when she's mortified. Then my heart aches for her. I held her hand a bit tighter, rubbing my thumb across her palm.

"I wish I could say he'll stop, but I'd be lying."

She looked up and half smiled. It didn't meet her eyes. My Bella. She's so beautiful. I couldn't wait to get her out on the lake in the row boat. I had many a wet dream about Bella in the row boat. The sun setting, her hair shining in the sunlight, her cheeks dusted with a touch of pink. Then we'd be naked. I shifted a little in my seat and adjusted myself discretely. Getting a hard-on with Bella sitting right next to me would not be good. I looked back down at her. She was looking out the window, watching the scenery pass by. I want to kiss her so badly. I can feel it on my lips. I can practically taste her, but I know the real thing could never compare to my imagination. She's so beautiful. I need to taste her. She felt me looking at her, like I feel her whenever I walk into a room, and she caught my gaze. I smiled. I can't help it. My stomach turns to butterflies, fluttering around like crazy, when she looks at me like that. I don't know how to describe it. She looks like she's opening presents on Christmas. Her deep brown eyes twinkle and her lips turn up into an almost smile. She just looks happy. It felt even better to know that she looked that way when she was looking at me.

"I'm excited. I promise you'll love it there."

"I believe you."

Her light laughter twinkled around me and I relished it. She makes me crazy. But in the best way.

"Alright you love birds, we're going to play a game."

Alice's head popped up above the headrest on her seat and she turned to face us. Each couple was given two pads and two pens. What the fuck? I looked over at Bella. She had started to doodle on her pad already and just shrugged when I raised a brow in question. So she and Alice hadn't planned this. Emmett and Rosalie were fighting over who would have what color pen. They are so dysfucktional. I don't understand how in the hell they make it work. I think they just have crazy break-up and make-up sex constantly. They're never content. Alice and Jasper couldn't fight if you put a gun to their heads. They make me gag sometimes, but I'm glad he's so good to my little sister. Emmett and Rose... I just don't get it. She's a crazy bitch. Puts new meaning to the word bitch. I know Emmett is goofy sometimes, but just give him a break. She makes me crazy. Emmett finally just gave up and stuck his tongue out at her. I felt Bella shake slightly with quiet laughter. I smirked.

"Would you believe me if I told you he's actually really smart?"

I looked down at Bella, who looked like I had just given her the world's hardest math problem. I know the feeling. I have to remind myself sometimes that he is actually better at math than I am.

"Yeah. He's going to Georgetown for Engineering. Early acceptance, full scholarship."

Bella's eyes went wide and her eyebrows shot up almost past her hairline. I just nodded.

"So this is like a twenty questions game to see how well you know each other or how compatible you are. Except it's not twenty questions long. But, whatever."

Alice chirped up again. I groaned and rolled my eyes, gripping my pen tightly. I fucking hate this shit. Why can't they just leave us alone? They all know they're fucking compatible. They've been together for fucking ever. It's clearly another dig at me. I almost snapped my pen in half as my grip got tighter and tighter on the pen. My finger tips turned white with tension. But I stopped, because there was a feather-light touch on my arm. I looked down to see Bella running her hand back and forth on my forearm, making soothing patterns with the tips of her fingers. My heart rate immediately slowed and my chest felt lighter. She's so perfect. She even knows how to calm me down. I'm such an ass. I can't believe I need to be calmed down. I looked up and met her gaze, giving her my signature crooked smile in appreciation. I need her way too much for my own good. My hand rested on top of hers and I held it firmly. I would never let her go.

"It's OK, Edward. This will be fun. Aren't you the least bit curious? What if we don't know each other? What if we aren't compatible?"

She looked up at me with a happy grin on her face, teasing. My face fell serious.

"That's impossible. There is no way we aren't compatible."

Her grin fell as well and she swallowed heavily, he luscious lips parting slowly. Maybe I'm too intense, I don't know, but there is nothing about us that isn't matched perfectly. She looked at me and her eyes softened. I held her gaze. I lost myself. Her eyes are so deep and perfect and dimensional. How anybody could not? She's so perfect. Her soft pink tongue darted out and moved over her bottom lip before slipping back into her mouth. Fuck me. I shifted in my seat but my eyes never left her face. I need her. I need to taste her. Now would be the perfect time. Just dip my head in and kiss her. I'd just brush them across her bottom lip first, just to feel how smoothly they glide underneath mine. Then I'd wait. If she didn't want to kiss me, I'd know by now. Then I could really kiss her, taste her, feel her. But I can't. She deserves so much better for our first kiss. I'd do it right. My skin tingled and my lips itched. I crave her like a fucking drug. The tension between us doubled and I could feel the breath in my chest get thicker. I watched as Bella's eyes left mine and traveled to my lips. She just watched them, her eyelids hooding those perfect chocolate pools. My throat felt dry. Her breaths came out now in shallow, quiet pants and I watched as she took her bottom lip between her front teeth. I felt myself get uncomfortably hard as she chewed on it gently, sucking it into her mouth as she watched me. Fuck me.

"Alright! Pens out, pads clean. First question."

As Alice spoke, both of us jumped up like we had been sitting on an open flame, queuing us out of our reverie. Bella seated herself far away from me, pressing her back up against the window, her knees bent and feet planted on the seat so that she was sitting sideways, facing me.

"Good idea, Bella! Em and Rose, separate yourselves so there is no cheating."

I sighed heavily and ran my fingers through my hair. Bella wouldn't look up at me. Of course I made her fucking uncomfortable. She's perfect, untainted. Fuck. Where the hell is my little buddy. He's supposed to be telling me what to do!

"OK, what is your special friend's favorite color?"

Fine. Game time. I'll apologize to her later. I looked down at my blank page and thought. Favorite color. Ah. That's easy. I wrote down my answer. Bella had already finished and was doodling something in the top corner of her page. I smiled to myself, glad that she wouldn't look at me for once. I love to just watch her. She's so beautiful. She had tucked her hair behind her ears, exposing her gorgeous and soft neck line so that her collar bone created shadows on her chest. I want to kiss it.

"Next question. What does your special friend want to be as an adult?"

Right. The quiz. I cleared my throat and sighed. Want to be? How the fuck do I interpret that? As in what job she wants to have? What she wants to be to somebody else? Well fuck. I thought. Hard. Emmett and Rosalie seemed just as confused as I was but Jasper seemed perfectly calm and Alice had a small smile on her face. I told you they're fucking perfect for each other. My eyes darted to Bella quickly, hoping she was able to finally look at me now. No cigar. Her pen moved quickly over the paper. I thought harder about the Bella I knew. Got it. I smiled triumphantly. Take that fucking Cosmopolitan quiz.

Alice got impatient again as she waited for us to finish. She's always impatient.

"Next question."

"But I'm not done!"

"Hurry the hell up, Rose! You should know this!"

"Fine! I'm done."

Bitch. She makes my skin crawl. I used to think she was attractive. I mean, I'd do her. But just hearing her speak makes me want to vomit. How somebody could be so vile is beyond me. And Emmett loves her! But that's only because he hasn't found someone like Bella. Sweet, quiet, smart, kind-hearted. She's perfect. I feel bad for hating Rosalie so much but I just can't stand someone so...miserable. Just smile! Once. It won't crack your face. I love it when Bella smiles. It makes my heart jump around like one of those Mexican Jumping bean thingies. I'm so fucking whipped, it's not even funny.

"Good. Now those were the warm-up questions. Here are the real ones. Question three: If you were sick, what would you want your special friend to do for you, and what would you do for your special friend if they were sick?"

"If she's sick? Why am I answering this question? Eduardo's the one with the doctor for a dad."

"It's about what you'd do to make them feel better, moron."

"I'm not a moron. I'm immature, there's a difference. My mom said so."

"No, you're both a moron and immature."

"Fine, Jizzper. What does recalcitrant mean? Hm?"

"That word does describe you well."

"Not the point!"

"Because you have an unusually large vocabulary that ensures you aren't a moron?"

"Duh."

I ignored the two asses up front. I had a quiz to take, and fuck me if I would fail it. I thought. Bella sick? It made me shiver. I'd do anything in my power to make it go away. I'd do anything, anything at all. I can't handle her in pain or uncomfortable. I thought about it and wrote my answer down to both questions.

"OK, now the next one. You want to take your special friend away on a great vacation to Paris for the weekend. What would they say?"

Hmm. Easy, I know this one. I smiled to myself as I brought the pen down to the paper and wrote.

"And the next. What is the cutest thing that your special friend does? It doesn't have to be cute, it could be sexy. But whatever it is, it has to make your heart melt and your knees go weak! Oh! I like this one!"

Alice giggled happily and wrote at a furious pace. Cute or sexy, and makes my knees go weak. Everything she does makes me feel like that. When she blinks I feel like I'm having a heart attack. One thing? I sighed and chose. I wouldn't even bother looking over at Bella. It'd hurt to much to see her thinking hard about something I did that makes her knees go weak. I'm not exactly the most suave Casanova.

"OK! What is your idea of a perfect day? Strange question."

Alice muttered under her breath but answered the question anyway. I wrote down my answer as well. My palms felt sweaty. What if I answer wrong. What if her answers tell me she doesn't really like me that much. I shuddered. Kill me if that's the case.

"And the last... what is one thing that you want from your special friend but haven't gotten yet?"

"Like a gift?"

"I think it's deeper than that."

"OK, Love Doctor, what the hell are they talking about, then?"

"Jesus Christ, Rose. I don't know. An act or service, not something you can hold in your hand."

"Oh."

Hmm. What is something I want from my Bella? Another easy one. After we had all written our answers down, we passed our pads up to Alice.

"OK! I am going to read the answers now couple by couple. First up are Rosalie and Emmett."

"Why us?"

"Because you have been together the longest and because I said so and my shoes are cuter than yours today."

"Not fair. I'm only wearing these because last time I was at the lake house my heels got stuck in the mud."

"Holy shit. Alice, just read the fucking things."

Yes, Emmett. Thank you. Alice rolled her eyes and cleared her throat.

"To question one, the color question, both of you answered that the other's favorite color is black. Wait, black?"

Emmett and Rosalie both nodded like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"It's slimming, and my favorite dress is black. The backless one with long sleeves."

"It always matches. I don't have to worry about what shit goes with what as long as it's black."

"You two are so weird."

"But you love me."

"Yes, Rosalie dear, I do. Anyway, next was 'What does your special friend want to be as an adult?' Rosalie said that Emmett wants to be a Chemical Engineer and- wait. A Chemical Engineer? Really, Emmett?"

"Yeah, she's right."

"Oh, OK. And Emmett said that Rosalie wants to be a mom."

Rosalie looked down at her lap and blushed slightly. Not as cute or beautiful as my Bella, but it did make her look slightly more endearing.

"Is that right, Rose?"

She just nodded and smiled softly. I smirked to myself. Who knew. Well, Emmett. There was a twinkle in his eye as he gave Rosalie a sideways glance, his hand sneaking over to take hers.

"You didn't think I was paying attention, did you?"

She blushed harder and shook her head, still not looking up but still smiling softly. OK, done with the love fest.

"Next question, Ali."

"Right. The sick one. Emmett said that if Rosalie were sick, he'd call a doctor. But not Mr. Cullen, because he's a douche. And if he were sick, he'd want Rosalie to- Emmett! I can't read that out loud! Ugh."

She shook her head and looked over at Rosalie's pad.

"Rosalie said that if you were sick she'd tell your mother and make sure you weren't contagious. And if she were sick she'd want you to call a doctor, but not Edward's dad because he scares her, and to stay the hell away from her because you'd probably make it worse with sex jokes. Hnh. Can't say I disagree with you there, Rose."

I heard a soft chuckle come from beside me. Bella's shoulders shook gently as she stifled a laugh. They are amusing if you haven't been around them long enough to understand their relationship.

"Is something funny, Isabella? I don't appreciate you making fun of my relationship with Emmett when you haven't even been with Edward for more than two months."

Bella paled and shook her head. I remember her saying how Rosalie intimidates her. I saw red like a fucking bull.

"Shut the fuck up, Rosalie. We've all been laughing at you two for years. You guys are fucked up and you know it. We're all having fun here."

"Oh, shut up, Edward. She can't speak for herself, either? Well than maybe you should rethink this little get together, then? Don't you have an STD to get checked for? Are you sure Bella's clean?"

My jaw clenched and I almost punched her. If I ever wanted to hit a girl it would be now. How dare she talk about my Bella like that.

"Rosie, just leave my new little sister alone. I want to hear the next answers."

Emmett threw his arm around Rosalie's shoulders, looking over his shoulder and winking apologetically at Bella. She looked a little shaken but still standing. I inched closer and sat so that my side was up against her shins on the seat. I unfolded her legs and laid them across my lap, my hands resting on her straightened knees. She's so little. My eyes caught hers and I smiled softly, fighting the urge still to kill the bitch in front of me. But Bella's eyes kept me focused. She's so perfect. They looked sad but she still had so much life left in her. Her lips were tightened in a grim line and she seemed to be silently begging for forgiveness, her eyebrows turned up in confusion. She was so worried about meeting my friends and now she surely thought I'd be mad at her for getting Rosalie pissed off. Like that's hard to do. I knotted mine and shook my head.

"Not your fault. I don't care if she's mad."

I whispered, as Rosalie didn't need to hear our conversation. Even though she was right in front of me, she was too absorbed in hearing the rest of the answers Alice was reading to even hear what I was saying, let alone remember I was behind her.

"But Edward..."

Bella whispered as well, still terrified of Makeupzilla.

"No, really. It's fine. You're getting along with everyone else, right? Emmett just told you he thinks of you as a little sister and Jasper likes everybody. And Alice is your best friend."

"No."

"I thought you liked Alice?"

"No, I mean... she's not my best friend."

"Oh. OK, well you're still getting along great with everybody. It's just Rosalie. She's...just miserable."

She laughed quietly and nodded.

"Yeah, I just don't want them to hate me."

I flashed her my crooked grin and reached out to touch the side of her face with the backs of my fingers, running a smooth line over her silk skin from temple to chin.

"Impossible."

She smiled back and leaned her face closer to my hand, turning it slightly so that I touched more of her. Electricity shot right through my to my groin, igniting a fire that had been on the verge of burning since I got into the car with her after school. It had started out as a simmer and now it was a full-fledged forest fire. Fuck me. She feels like heaven. Her skin is like porcelain, flawless and like alabaster. I want to kiss her. I need to feel her underneath me, writhing and screaming in ecstasy.

"Hel-lo-o-o? Edward?"

"Edmundo, wake the fuck up."

Hnh? I tore my eyes and hand away from Bella and looked up. Alice was glaring at me and had my pad waving in the air.

"Your turn! Duh!"

I nodded and turned in my seat, flashing Bella another reassuring grin.

"Alright, Edward...you say Bella's favorite color is green. Is that true?"

She nodded and blushed, looking down at my hands on her knees across my lap.

"And Edward, Bella says your favorite color is blue. Correct?"

I nodded and smiled soundly. She knows my favorite color. I bet she doesn't know that it makes me hard to see that color against her skin. I'll save that one for later.

"Then the next question, Edward said that when Bella is an adult she wants to be happy and healthy. Huh? That's it?"

I nodded and shrugged. If I knew Bella at all its that she just wants to be happy with who she is, not what her bank account is. I looked to Bella and she smiled, nodding softly.

"OK, and Bella you said that Edward wants to be whatever he wants, and certainly not a doctor."

I laughed and nodded.

"That's pretty true. I want to be whatever I want, whenever I want."

"OK, sick time. Bella said that if Edward were sick she'd bring you soup every day and make sure that you were taking your medicine. She'd tutor you to make sure you didn't fall behind. How sweet! And she said that if she were sick she'd want you to stay away so that you didn't catch it."

I scoffed.

"What?"

I looked over at Bella.

"Not going to happen."

She smiled, blushing. Fuck. The rose tint to her cheeks made my breathing falter and I had to look away. It's enough already that the weight of her legs on me, even though they barely weigh anything at all, is tempting me to do dishonorable things.

"Edward said that if Bella were sick he'd take her to Bumrungrad Hospital. What? Where the hell is that?"

"Thailand."

"And why, would you take my friend to Thailand, Edward?"

"It's the best hospital in the entire world."

Alice shook her head. Bella blushed again and smiled.

"Thanks."

"Sure."

I squeezed her knees gently and looked back up at Alice, who had the biggest shit-eating grin on her face. She loves it when Bella and I smile at each other. Something about never having seen me so happy before. I don't know. She's nuts.

"Moving on, Edward said that if he were to take Bella on a fantastic vacation to Paris she would say, 'Edward, return our tickets and spend yours on yourself. Mine, donate to charity or buy something nice for your mother.' Hnh. Really?

"Yes. I hate it when people spend money on me."

I rolled my eyes and nodded. It drives me crazy that she won't even let me pay for her on our dates. She told me that guys pay for girls only on dates! Well then, what the fuck have we been doing? Whatever makes her happy.

"Fa-reak. Anyway, Bella said that Edward would smile and start to pack. Yeah, pretty much sounds like Edward. Jeeze, you guys are boring. OK, so now the best question of all."

Alice peered dramatically over the top of our pads with one eyebrow raised maniacally. Christ. Which question is this?

"What is the cutest thing that your special friend does? Edward, you said the cutest, or sexiest, thing that Bella does is blush. Aw!"

Alice giggled and cocked her head at me, like she was watching the world's cutest puppy. Emmett turned around in his seat and snorted, looking me over once before winking again at Bella. I hate them. Rosalie didn't even turn around. Good. Because I would have gauged her eyes out with a spoon. My eyes were drawn to Bella, who was blushing feverishly. I smiled softly at her.

"I hate blushing. It always gives me away."

She spoke softly as I lifted my hand to trace her cheek with the tip of my index finger. If I could see one thing for the rest of my life it would be her, just like this. Looking up at me through her thick eyelashes, cheeks dusty pink and her pouty lower lip tucked underneath her top front teeth. Fucking beautiful.

"Ahem!"

Oh, right. I snapped out of it and looked back at Alice.

"Now, Bella said that the cutest thing that Edward does is- Oh my god! Does he really do that?"

Bella grinned widely like she was proud of something big and nodded slowly. What?

"Bella says that the cutest thing that Edward does is recite Shakespeare to her."

My face felt hot as I heard what she said. Fuck! Nobody needed to know about that. I groaned and buried my face in my hands, watching through my fingers as Jasper pulled over to the side of the road to collapse in heaps of choking laughter. Emmett was already on the floor between his seat and Jasper's, holding his stomach and shaking uncontrollably, relishing in my pain. Rosalie snickered but never lost her 'cool'. God forbid the girl enjoy herself. I looked over at Bella and my heart swelled to the size of a watermelon. She was beaming. Her smile stretched from ear to ear and she looked gloriously happy. Whatever keeps her smiling like that, I'll do it. I'd recite the entire script of Romeo and Juliet, just so she would crack a small grin. Anything.

"Oh, oh that is rich. Oh-oh-m-"

Emmett just laughed harder as he tried to speak.

"Edward, that is so cute. I'm proud of you. Mom raised you right."

Alice dried the tears from under her eyes and stifled the last bits of laughter that bubbled out of her little chest. Fuck me. I'm never living this down. Jasper calmed himself and pulled back out onto the high way. Emmett still laughed like a buffoon on the floor.

"Can we move on. PLEASE?"

"Yes, Edward. Relax."

She cleared her throat and looked down the list to the next question.

"OK, so to the perfect day, both Edward and Bella replied, 'With him'. Well, Edward said, 'With her', but it's the same thing."

I smiled slightly, just tilting the corners of my lips up. See, she likes me. I squeezed Bella's knees again and winked at her. She blushed. I groaned. She giggled. It's a never ending cycle.

"The last question, and most important one, I think. What is one thing that you want from your special friend but haven't gotten yet? Let's see...."

She hummed softly to herself as she scanned the pages for our answers. Once she found them, her eyes widened. She blinked quickly and looked at both Bella and me, stunned. I know, I know. I'm a loser. Please, don't read it out loud. Alice, please. I'll give you anything. Anything. She wants a yellow Porsche. I'll buy it. I'll dip into my savings. Anything.

"Alice."

"I know, Edward."

"What?"

"Nothing, Jazz. Just drive."

"Ali."

"Drive."

"Alice, come on! You read mine and Rose's."

"Yeah. And you're going to read ours."

"Jasper, shut up. I'm not reading it. And Emmett, go to sleep or something."

"Al-"

"DRIVE!"

She's quite feisty, that one. He grunted and accelerated. I gave my sister an appreciative smile and mouthed a 'thank you' to her. I fucking love my sister. I looked over at Bella. Fuck. Thank god Alice likes me sometimes. My mind didn't dare wander to the possibilities of what Bella wanted from me. Frankly, I'm scared to find out.

"I'm pulling over. I have to take a leak."

"How sexy."

Alice rolled her eyes and huffed as we pulled into a gas station. She hates when we take detours or make pit stops. Once the car was parked, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie piled out and darted to the bathrooms. I told them not to drink all that water. Nobody listens to me.

"Bella, do you want to get out?"

"No, I'm OK."

I smiled and nodded.

"Um, Edward?"

"Yeah?"

She fidgeted a bit and looked down at my hands on her knees, biting her bottom lip again. Shit.

"C-can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"What is it that you want from me but haven't gotten yet?"

I paled. Shit. Didn't see that one coming. I stammered a bit before swallowing again. My heart started to beat at an unhealthy rate. Why me? Why do I always get myself into these situations? Bella's eyes widened once she saw my immediate distress.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to put you on the spot or anything, I just..."

"No, no. It's fine."

"You don't have to answer."

"No, I want to. Because I want to hear your answer as well. If there is anything at all I can give you, you know I would, right?"

She blushed again and nodded slowly. Her beautiful thick hair glistened as the sunlight crept in through the tinted windows of the truck. She's so beautiful. Being this close to her makes me want to die of happiness. It's possible. I Googled it.

"So, uh, Bella. Would it be alright if you told me your answer first? If that's OK, I mean, if it's no-"

"Um, sure."

I could see the wheels turning in her head. Fuck. Too much pressure. I shouldn't have said that. Now she'll hate me forever. It's official. She'll hate me, I'll die of misery, not happiness, and the world will end. Mine will, anyway. I almost threw up.

"Well, I uh....I want..."

I unconsciously leaned closer, my hands creeping just inches higher on her legs. Please, my Bella.

"Anything, Bella. You know that."

She looked up at me, finally. Her eyes shone bright with something, I'm not sure what. They twinkled and I almost fell into the chocolate pools I saw there. My god, do I need her. It hurt to breathe and I felt my chest constrict with anxiety. Please, my Bella, put me out of my misery. And then her voice, whisper quiet, ended my suffering,

"A kiss, Edward."

Somebody slap me.

**Hehehe. So....what did you think? This is the first time that Bella has been with Edward and his friends together. Well, with any of them except Alice. I think it was fitting and pretty in character. Except my Rosalie is a bit more....rude. lol. Please review and let me know what your favorite lines were. I asked you to do it once before and those were my favorite reviews! I love seeing what you enjoyed.**


	16. Chapter 16

**I'm sorry this took so long! Please don't hate me :)**

Somebody slap me. Holy shit. Praise Jesus, Buddha, Allah, whoever the fuck is up there. She wants me to kiss her? This has got to be a joke. I think I'm on Candid Camera. Do they even have that show anymore? On its own accord, my body conveyed my shock. My eyebrows shot up to my hair line and my eyes opened so wide it must have looked like they were bulging out of my head. My heart thundered in my chest, banging around my chest cavity so hard that I swear I could hear it. Holy hell. This perfect, wonderful creature wants me to kiss her. Those lips. They're so soft and kissable, rosy and smooth. She puts Chapstick on like it's her job. I fucking love John Morton. He created Chapstick. You can check. I Googled it. A groan tore through my chest.

"Oh! I shouldn't have said that. You don't want me. I'm sorry, Edward. Just forget I said anything."

I watched in horror as my angel shook her head furiously and buried her face in her delicate hands, shrugging her shoulders up to her ears like she could hide in a shell. Fuck. How can she think that I don't want to kiss her? My beautiful, perfect angel. She's so perfect. Does she not realize that I dream about kissing her? I swear to god I've felt her lips against mine in my dreams. Have I ever told you what a sorry bastard I am? Really and truly, I am pathetic. 'Say something, Cullen.' I'm on it!

"No! Bella, no. That's not it at all! I want you more than you know, more than you can imagine. I was just….surprised. I didn't think you'd be comfortable with me like that. I mean….fuck. I don't know. I always think I'm pressuring you and…."

I'm so fucking stupid. I ran my fingers through my hair, looking about the empty car, like the answer to my problem was plastered on the back of the driver's seat or something. My voice had been kind of high pitched, like someone had grabbed me by the balls. It sure as hell felt like it. She makes me crazy. Never in my life had I been so unsure of myself. I felt so damn vulnerable, like a turtle without a shell or some shit like that. Just being in this car with her, so close and alone makes my joints feel like Jell-O. I looked back over at her.

Wrong move. I groaned again at the sight of her. Her blush had spread across her flawless, milky white skin so that a broad sweep of pink dusted over her cheeks, up to her ears, and even down to her chest. Oh, god help me. Give me strength, because I'm ready to throw her down and have my wicked way with her right now. My tongue darted out and moistened my dry bottom lip. I want to be licking her chest instead. I'd start out at her cheek, and then go down to the corner of her mouth. I'd lick those pouty lips; spend extra time on the top one. It's slightly oversized but so fucking inviting. Then I'd work my way down her neck, suckling on the soft skin I now know waits for me. Finally, the dip at the base of her throat, the little indentation that is just waiting to be bathed by my tongue. Holy hell. If she tastes just half as perfect as she smells, I'll die a happy man. Man, right. She's turned me back into a pathetic little boy.

She looked back at me with puppy dog eyes, eyebrows turned up slightly in confusion. Stop it, Bella, if you plan on staying a virgin until marriage. I can't take it anymore. She took her perfect bottom lip into her mouth, chewing on it gently as she watched me, her hands folded in her lap. Her shoulders were raised slightly and pinched together so that she looked to be the size of a peanut. She's so fragile and breakable. I knew she didn't know what to say. I just want to know what she's thinking. I want to protect her from everything. If the wind blew too hard she'd be gone. Is it wrong that I'm dying to wrap my arms around her and hold her to me? Because I don't think I'll ever feel complete until I do. I need her so badly. She's a drug and I'm an addict, a shameless addict.

Please say something. I just sat there like an idiot, my hands resting on her knees, her legs still stretched out over my thighs. My fingertips tingle whenever I touch her. It's like I'm trying to absorb as much of her as I can, whether it be through my fingertips or my thighs. I'll take both, but the fact that her legs are so close to my dick reminds me that it's still possible for me to pop a boner at any given moment. Almost the entire time I've been trying to imagine puppies and grandmothers. So far, I've been doing a good job of not pitching a tent. I have a feeling I'll create shelter soon, though. She's so fucking warm and I silently praised the higher powers that I've been given the privilege of touching her knees. Even her knees are beautiful.

A shaky hand went to her head as she ran her fingers through her hair, pushing it back and out of her face so that the apples of her cheeks seemed more pronounced. Those cheek bones. I want to kiss them. She looks so nervous and afraid. I have to fix her. She needs to know just how much I need, no, crave her.

"Edward, you don't have to-"

"Bella, I've wanted to kiss you since you fell over in Biology."

I laughed a nervous, weak laugh. She looked like she was going to throw up. Someone as quiet and respectable as Bella doesn't just come out and ask for a kiss. And she smiled. My fucking god, she smiled. I felt my heart twist and tear and quake in my chest and I just wanted to hold her. I felt so empty just then. My arms felt bare and my skin was tingling. I could have cried. I needed to hold her so badly. I needed to feel her against my chest and taste her sweet breath. All because she had turned her little pout into a precious smile. I smiled back. I couldn't help it. Have you ever felt so completely alone even though someone was sitting right next to you, even half on top of you? I know. Because I would never be whole until I had her in my arms forever. Maybe if I crawled into her skin with her I'd be satisfied. I'm not sure that it'd be enough.

Her smile softened and her blush grew deeper, almost as red as a cherry. Fucking beautiful. The knot in her brow untied and her beautiful, flawless face looked more perfect than ever. She glowed with a new light of confidence. I'd never say she is actually confidence, but now she at least thought that she is worth something. She is diluted in her self-image, my beautiful Bella.

"H-have you really?"

"Yeah."

It was embarrassing, but I couldn't lie. But it seemed to be fine because she smiled again, looking me in the eye. My head was swimming. Everything we'd done together, said to each other, every little memory, swirled around my brain like a flip book. I saw it all and it hit me hard. It felt like a ton of bricks and it seemed like the wind had been sucked from my lungs. Who would have thought that Edward fucking Cullen would be incapacitated by a montage of romantic moments with a virgin he met only weeks before. We were so close but she felt so far away. The little bolts of electricity I felt from her weren't as pronounced now that I had been around her for so long, though I don't think I'd ever be able to get over her smell. It affects me in ways I didn't think possible. If I didn't touch her with my lips, anywhere on her body, in the near future, I'm sure self-combustion would be in order. She needs to know.

"You don't know how long I've waited for you. If it helps, I wrote the same thing down on my paper. I need to kiss you, because it hurts to breathe right now."

I whispered the last part. My throat felt like a desert and it seemed to be closing, fast. I think this is what it feels like to be suffocating. Is it possible to suffocate because you want to kiss your girlfriend? Dying from withdrawal or something like that? I may be the first case ever recorded. As I felt myself lean closer to her, I saw her body respond the same. Just like the past times I tried to kiss her, her lids hooded those beautiful doe eyes and her breathing got heavy, rasping out from between her plump lips. Fuck me. And she leaned kind of closer, closer than she normally did. Maybe she needs me just as much as I need her. I can only hope. My grip tightened on her legs over my lap and I leaned closer still. The tension in the air hung thick like a curtain around us. It needed to be relieved, fast.

My groin tightened when her tongue flittered out to wet her lips before retreating back into her hot little mouth. I'm pretty sure I groaned out loud. My eyes closed a bit more and I saw that hers were almost completely shut.

"Edward?"

I just nodded, knowing she could feel it with only five inches between us. Her voice sounded shaky. I want to hold her. But she'd probably run away.

"I um, I've never been kissed before."

She whispered even softer so I almost didn't hear it. It shocked me first but for some reason it made my heart flutter. My beautiful, innocent Bella. Untainted, and pure. I fucking need her.

"I don't think your first kiss should be in the back of a car at a gas station."

I whispered as well before licking my lips that had become dry from my ragged breathing. It just seemed appropriate. I'm an ass, what can I say?

"As long as it's you, I don't care."

Holy fuck. I didn't trust myself to speak. I just nodded and leaned closer still. So close. So, so close. She continued to match my movements and I couldn't help how my heart was pounding at her admission. Here we go. Get a helmet, ladies and gentlemen, because there is no way we are going back now. Emmett, the class, I don't care if Attila and the Huns come crashing through the windows. There is NO going back now.

And like our bodies were made for each other, my right hand left her leg and reached up to cup the side of her face. With my thumb placed on her cheekbone and my four fingers caressing the back of her head, I finally closed the distance between us. With just centimeters to spare, I turned my head slightly to the left so that our noses would collide. It had to be perfect. God help me if I don't get this perfect for her. I felt her tiny hands as they moved to my biceps, gently moving up to my shoulders. I shuddered. Having her touch my skin was the most invigorating feeling I'd ever experienced. At feeling my shudder, she retreated slightly before getting the nerve to inch her hands up to my neck. It felt even better than when she touched my arms. Her hands felt like silk on my neck and my groin tingled at the sensations her contact gave me. It seemed like slow motion but all of this happened in mere seconds, seconds of pure bliss and anticipation.

I could taste her sweet breath on my tongue. That undid me. Without further wait, I closed the distance between us completely. Gently, so fucking gently, our lips melded together. Hers were so warm and soft, just as I had dreamt. She tasted like heaven. Sugar, honey, and perfection. And just like that, my entire world disappeared in a whirl and it was just my perfect Bella. I didn't see that we were in a car anymore; I didn't feel the leather seats beneath me or the stale air in the backseat. Just my Bella. I sighed into her lips and I felt her do the same, egging me on further. My heart thundered in my chest and suddenly it wasn't enough. I pressed harder, pulling her closer by the back of her head. Our lips moved in perfect synchronization painstakingly slow and her hands tangled into my unruly hair on the back of my head. She tugged roughly as our kiss deepened. It hurt but in the best way.

First I would move my lips and then she would respond. Still so slowly. She tasted so good. I moaned quietly and she responded with a whimper. Like a little kitten. I groaned again. My life is complete. Kissing Bella Swan is heaven, I can assure you. Before long, her top lip was between mine and I gently suckled on the sweet flesh. She needed me just as much as I needed her. Sometime after our lips made contact, my other hand had left her knee and made it to her narrow waist. I caressed her side gently, running my fingertips up and down slowly. My lungs screamed at me for air and it felt like I had a forest fire burning in my capillaries. Fuck. If my lungs were in need of air then certainly Bella's were. I reluctantly pulled away, gently, just as gently as I had kissed her, and nosily caught my breath. That was the hardest thing I ever had to do, release her lips from the kiss. I didn't dare move any more than a few inches from her lips so that I could still taste her breath on my tongue as she, too, heaved for oxygen. And everything came back into focus.

She had moved even closer so that her thighs were now over my lap and she was practically sitting on me. I opened my eyes slightly to see that hers were also cracked a bit, not open by any means. Our breathing was still ragged as I released her head to run my fingers through her silky hair, starting at her temple and finally resting on her shoulder blade. My hand left her side and I snaked my arm around her back, pulling her even closer still. I couldn't get enough. Her delicate hands still held my hair. I never wanted her to let go. She's so delicious. My eyes opened a bit more and I looked down at her swollen lips, watching as her bottom one got sucked in a bit with each harsh inhale. My heart sped up. It was one of the sexiest things I had ever seen. And let me remind you, I know sexy. I'm a disgusting pig and Bella has ruined me for all other girls. I will never be able to kiss another.

"Nnh."

I just nodded. Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. Having her so close to me, sitting on my now, I couldn't stand another day without feeling like this. Heaven.

**So there you have it. What do you think????? I promise the next update will be sooner! Please tell me what you thought of their first kiss :) I kinda like it. **


	17. Chapter 17

**Ok, so I've been doin' a little research and now I feel the need to apologize. I have yet to find another author/story that made you wait 16 chapters for a first kiss. Then, the first kiss doesn't even have tongue! So, I apologize. I made you all wait and I understand if some of you thought it was anticlimactic. I think it was sweet and perfect for them. But, hey, I respect my readers. Hopefully their weekend away will leave you feeling satisfied. **

Our breathing turned back to normal after a few more silent tries. I didn't really want it to, because with her breathing so heavily before I had been able to taste every gush of air she let out. Delicious. I pulled her even closer to me. She sat on me fully now, and her arms were wrapped snuggly behind my neck. So, so close. Finally, after all this time, I had my Bella in my arms and she was holding me to her just as strongly.

"That was way better than I dreamed."

I chuckled quietly at myself. I'm such a fucking nerd. Not the cool kind like Pharrell, you know, N.E.R.D.? I'm turning nerd like I admit to my girlfriend that I dreamed of kissing her. I opened my eyes wider and my face got hot. Where the fuck did my filter go? Thankfully, Bella was looking back into my eyes with a small smile on her beautiful, now swollen lips.

"You dream about kissing me?"

Her sweet voice sounded…hopeful? I brushed my fingertips over the blush on her flawless face. She's so beautiful. I kissed her cheek. She felt warm against my lips. Even her cheek tastes sweet. Too perfect.

"Yes. And I'm not ashamed of it."

"Edward Cullen! You dream about me? That's adorable!"

She laughed a little breathlessly and pulled back so that she could see my face. Fuck me. I groaned and looked down at our laps, embarrassed out of my mind. Why me? See, now Bella knows what a loser I am. How is it that all my high school days I get every girl that I want and when it comes to the one I actually want I make a fool out of myself? What's with that? I asked Jasper about it the other day, and he said it's called 'Life'. But what the hell does he know? A lot, actually. Now that I think about it, he's probably smarter than most people I know. And he retained more of the Russian than I did at those classes. But I digress.

"Nothing about me is adorable, Bella."

She laughed again and shook her head, her silky brown hair falling over her shoulders.

"I beg to differ. I think everything about you is adorable."

"Of all the things I've been called, you chose adorable."

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, hardly serious at all. Her heart-shaped face got that pensive look again, the one where she purses her lips and her eyebrows knot together. Now, _she _is adorable. I kissed the tip of her wrinkled nose.

"And what have you been called, Edward?"

I thought.

"Sexy, handsome, smart, charming, smooth, debonair, suave…"

I ended with a casual shrug and looked at her very matter-of-factly. My Bella smells so good. I pulled her closer, only to be resisted by her leaning back to look at me. I felt one of my eyebrows raise in question as she had that very serious look again. Her eyes scanned me from head to lap, as far as she could see, and she made little humming noises as she did so. My groin tingled.

"What are you looking at?"

I felt like a self-conscious little girl.

"I'm checking."

"For?"

She didn't answer; she just looked me over again. What the hell?

"Nope."

"Nope?"

"Nope, I don't see it."

"Don't see what?"

She rolled her eyes.

"What you were talking about. You being sexy and handsome and suave. I don't see it."

My eyes widened and my jaw dropped in mock offense.

"Is that so?"

"Mhm. Average, acceptable at best."

I brought my hand over my heart and made a hurt sound, a scoff kind of. I played it up a bit, but there was a small part of me that really did wonder if she found me attractive or not. I mean, girls settle all the time. Does she really not think I'm good looking? I've always just gone on what people have told me. I don't really know if I'm good looking or not. I'm not attracted to myself, any men for that matter. I work out, I groom, but that's as far as it goes. I started to panic a bit. 'Keep it together, Cullen!' Uh huh, easy for you to say. Why am I acting like a little freshman girl? The ones that I used to prey on. All they want to hear is that they are attractive and accepted. That sounds nice right now, actually. I just want her to want me. Can somebody hand me my balls back please? I believe they are located in Isabella Swan's pocket.

"Edward."

I felt warm hands on my cheeks and I snapped back. Oh shit. Bella was looking deep into my eyes, searching for something. Her eyes are so beautiful.

"Yeah?"

"I was kidding, Edward."

She laughed softly and kissed me. It was just as sweet as before but more gentle. I kissed her back, groaning quietly as I felt her teeth graze my bottom lip. All too soon she pulled away. She's a damn good kisser.

"Edward, I was just joking. You are handsome, smart, charming, all of that and more. I've never met anybody more beautiful than you are."

A blush crept up her cheeks at the admission. I felt a grin spread over my own face. Her smile in return made everything in the world right again. She's so beautiful it hurts. And I kissed her. Like it was going to save my life. Our lips crashed together with a new hunger I didn't know I had. It started out tender and sweet but it soon got more forceful. I tangled my fingers in hair on either side of her head, holding her to me with all my power. She tugged my hair in return, quite roughly, and pressed her chest into mine. My heart thundered in my chest with the rush I was getting, like a high just from kissing her. Our lips moved in perfect synchronization and she tasted so delicious. But it still didn't feel like enough. Without breaking our pattern too much, I snaked the tip of my tongue out to taste her bottom lip, just dragging it across before retracting. She whimpered softly in return and gave my hair another firm pull. I groaned. She manages to turn me on by almost ripping out my hair. She's an angel. I took the whimper as consent and repeated my actions; this time letting the very tip of my tongue wet both of her lips.

It felt odd, like I was licking her, but it felt right at the same time. Like there should be a new way to kiss just because of Bella. My Bella. She whimpered again and I felt a small rush of breath as her lips parted for me. I didn't waste any time before slipping my tongue into her hot little mouth. Just tasting her first, I slid my tongue along hers until I felt her begin to react gently. Our tongues meshed and our lips collided in the most amazing kiss I'd ever had. Her mouth should be considered a lethal weapon. As she rubbed her tongue against mine, the familiar clenching in my groin started up again. I groaned into her mouth breathlessly and pulled her even tighter to my chest. My fingers tightened in her hair, and before I knew it, we were making out in the backseat of Jasper's Suburban. What can I say, we're pretty classy. Her hands left my hair and quickly found the collar of my tee-shirt before sliding her fingers beneath it to feel the skin on my back. She whimpered and dragged her nails over my traps. Holy hell. Of all the girls I have kissed, I never kissed any of them like I kissed Bella. And I had never been kissed by a girl like Bella kissed me.

"Hey, Sex Ed! Get your tongue out of Bella's throat so we can go!"

What the fuck? I pulled away from Bella, who had immediately buried her face in the crook of my neck, and looked out the window. Rosalie, Jasper, Alice, and Emmett were standing no more than twenty feet from the car. Alice was busy slapping Emmett on the chest repeatedly and scolding him. I sighed and shook my head. Why, oh why, did Jasper have to have tinted windows only in the front of the truck?

"Oh my _god._"

Bella's muffled words made my heart sink. Yeah, pretty much. She sounded mortified and I smirked softly when I imagined how red her face was. My poor Bella. I sighed and turned my head slightly to kiss her temple.

"I'm sorry, my Bella. If it helps, I don't think anybody but Emmett saw us."

She sighed and shook her head, still burrowing into my neck. Her warm breath tickled the skin there.

"That's worse. He won't ever let it go."

Ah. She knows him so well already. I chuckled softly and nodded against her hair.

"Are you sure that today was only the first time you've been kissed?"

"Mhm. Why?"

She still kept her face firmly planted in the crook of my neck, murmuring against my pulse, but I could still understand her words. It felt so damn good to have her lips against my skin.

"You were pretty damn good."

I chuckled softly and kissed the top of her head before depositing her back on the seat next to me. Emmett and Jasper could only be held off for so long. I watched as they struggled against Alice's clutches. I love my sister. Bella shifted uncomfortably on the seat next to me, looking down at her hands in her lap. I immediately felt naked. I wanted her back on my lap, in my arms where she belonged. My beautiful, perfect, delicious Bella. Her face, to be expected, could put a tomato to shame.

"It's OK, really. If you knew how many times I walked in on them in various stages of undress, you'd understand."

That made her blush even harder, her hands going to her face as she shook her head with a groan. Shit. I just compared our getting caught kissing to being caught having sex. Way to fucking go. Maybe I just shouldn't speak anymore. In my final attempt to soothe Bella, I wrapped my arm around her slim torso and pulled her tight against me, allowing her to ride out her embarrassment with her head against my stomach. It felt good to have her touching me again. It took only a moment for the rest of the crew to open the doors to the monster of a vehicle. Shit. Here they come. Jasper got into the driver's seat first, not even looking back at me, but I could tell he was grinning. Sneaky bastard. He can always feel people's emotions, know what they are feeling and shit like that. He's having a party inside that stupid blonde head of his. Alice flashed me an apologetic look as she popped into her seat and sighed, leaning over to kiss Jasper briefly. She tried. Bella stiffened in my arms as she heard and felt the car load up with people. Next was Rosalie, holding a water bottle and a protein bar. It's her substitute to actual food. That's how she stays so damn thin, 'modelesque'. She has curves, I guess, but really, she looks like she needs to eat a burger. With perfect grace she moved into her seat, giving me a sneer that could turn a man to stone. I'm immune to her.

"Hello Rose. Have a nice time draining the Sea Monster?"

"Why, yes. Thank you for asking. Have a nice time corrupting the Virgin Mary?"

"Fuck you."

"Wouldn't you like to."

I scoffed, shaking my head. Evil wench. She flipped her hay colored hair over her shoulder and rolled her eyes. She thinks she's the gift to the world. Really, she's like a piece of meat that you leave in the back of the refrigerator and only remember it when it starts to stink so bad that you can taste it in the rest of the food. Rancid, foul, rotten, belonging in the trash. And I only hate her because she likes to make my life miserable. Because I turned her down once when we were drunk? It seems dumb enough, but I always thought there was another reason behind it. I don't know. Maybe I never will. But for now, I'm content with harassing her just as much as she harasses me. Thank god Emmett bounced in because I was ready to gauge her eyes out. Well, maybe it's not a good thing that Emmett was there.

"Weh-heh-heh-hell, if it isn't Ron Jeremy and Jenna Jameson. Make any good movies while we were gone? Something kinky? I bet Bella's into some crazy shit. A little bondage, strangulation. The usual."

"Emmett!"

"No. Way kinkier shit. Biting? Aha! _Blood play._"

He let out a bark of a laugh and shook his head, clicking his seatbelt as Jasper began to pull out of the lot.

"Aw, I'm just fucking with you! Bella, I think this is a whole new level of red for you. You're rockin' the cherry tomato!"

"Emmett, jeeze, will you leave her alone?"

Alice rolled her eyes and sighed, turning around in her seat. She had that pissed off look, the one that dares you to try anything funny. She really is a little spitfire. I wouldn't want to piss her off too badly. Remember when she punched me for running away? Don't let her size fool you. She's the real deal, UFC fighter in training, I swear. I felt Bella sit up and snuggled into my side so she could watch the show.

"Relax, Al. It's all in good fun."

"_All in good fun_! Emmett fucking McCarty!"

Oh boy. Here we go. I looked over at Bella. Her face had gone back to its beautiful shade of cream and she was smiling, watching her friend in action. Friend. I had thought they were best friends. But Bella specifically said they weren't best friends. Hnh.

"Hey, Bella?"

I whispered, so as not to disturb Alice while she blasted Emmett's ass into space. She looked up at me, chocolate eyes sparkling. Holy hell. My breath hitched in my throat. She laughed quietly.

"What, Edward?"

Oh, yeah. Back to the task at hand.

"Why isn't Alice your best friend? You guys are friends, I thought she was your best friend, but then you said she wasn't and I don't really know of any other girls you like to be around as much as Alice…"

She gave me a funny look, like I was crazy. I am. She's not wrong. Her eyebrows knotted together and she cocked her head to the side a bit. I sighed, shook my head, and clarified, still whispering.

"I mean, who's your best friend, Bella?"

She smiled.

"You, Dummy."

What the hell? I raised a brow.

"Really?"

"Uh, yeah?"

She laughed and shook her head, like she had just confirmed the most obvious fact in the world.

"For such a smart guy, you really are quite clueless, Edward."

My heart thundered in my chest cavity and I couldn't help the stupid grin that was on my face. I'm her best friend! Hah! Without much thought, I turned her face to me with the tip of my finger on her cheek and kissed her sweet, perfectly disproportional lips. Delicious.

"They're doing it again! Somebody get the camera! I can sell this shit!"

Fucking Emmett. Really, he's lucky I love him. He let out that stupid guffaw again and buckled in to his seat. I hate him. My poor Bella rolled her eyes, trying furiously to stop her face from giving away her embarrassment. I didn't want to break it to her, but that's impossible. And she's so beautiful when she blushes. I couldn't help it, I kissed her again. I'm like a drug addict. It's terrible.

Without much more from the peanut gallery, we arrived at the house in time. We were all starving so getting into the house was a calamity. Alice and Jasper immediately dashed for the spare bedroom downstairs. They like that one because it's secluded. Personally, I quite like having my sister and her boyfriend so far away from the room I stay in. I stay blissfully ignorant, everyone stays happy. Emmett and Rosalie went to deposit their belongings in Emmett's room. Bella and I were left in the entrance hall.

"Edward!"

I felt a rough jab in my side and scowled as I reached a hand down to hold it, applying pressure to relieve the pain.

"What the hell did I do?"

Bella looked absolutely panicked, her eyes scanning the first floor of the house.

"You said this was an old house that you and the guys _fixed up_ with Emmett's dad!"

She half whispered, half yelled at me as she snaked her head around to peak, her hands tightening the hold she had on the handle to her bag. I raised a brow.

"It is, Bella."

"No it is not. This house is nicer than mine and way nicer than any house I've been in, besides yours. There is no way this needed to be fixed up."

I raised a brow.

"Yeah, it did. We had to repaint every room in the house."

What the hell is wrong with her? Her gorgeous brown eyes rolled again, she's good at that, and she scoffed, shaking her head. I didn't understand what the problem was.

"I can't be here with you guys. I'm not from this type of family, Edward."

She looked around the entrance again, taking in the stone details and antique fixtures. She looked…sad? Embarrassed a little, I could tell that, but she just looked uncomfortable in general. I felt a clenching in my throat at seeing her like that. My beautiful Bella.

"Don't you dare say that. A house means nothing. Now come on. We have to bring our stuff upstairs."

I didn't wait for an answer. I was unsure of what else I could say to convince her but maybe if I distracted her it would help. I took her slender hand in mine and headed for the stairs. I seemed to be dragging her behind me as we ascended and then finally going down the hall to the room I usually stayed in. I loved that room. It was like a safe haven, the whole house was. For all of us. Emmett's dad made sure that if we needed to get away, we had a safe place to go to. He did an amazing job. I got that clenching feeling again as I thought about Mr. McCarty and his stroke. He's such an amazing guy. He's like this big bear, kind of like Emmett, only stronger. It's like he's made of steel and nothing can take him down. Emmett is so much like him. They have the same laugh that shakes the entire table they're sitting at. But Mr. McCarty has a lot of laugh lines and some grey hair. He just looks happy and worn in. Like a good glove. I smiled softly to myself, thinking about the time Jasper and I spent with him regardless of Emmett's availability. Most of the time he wasn't even there. He was just a good substitute for a father figure.

"Edward?"

I was snapped back into reality by Bella's shy voice. I looked around the room. Just as we had left it. The queen size bed was pushed against the wall to the right so that it looked out the window that took up the entire wall on the left side, letting you see the lake and backyard from bed. It's pretty nice. Oh, yeah my Bella.

"What do you think?"

She held onto her bag and looked around, her eyes widening as she took in each feature. It really is a nice room.

"Yeah, it's fine, but…where will I sleep?"

"The bed?"

I took her bag from her hands, walked across the room, and set it down on the trunk at the foot of the bed. I'd let her take the closet and I would take the dresser.

"Well, then where will you sleep?"

Oh shit. I hadn't thought about that. Hnh. I had never brought a girl with me here before. My eyes fell to the couch that looked out over the lake in the corner of the room. About a foot too short for me, but it's better than the floor.

"Is that even long enough for you?"

"Yeah. I sleep kind of on my side, anyway. I sleep there all the time."

Lie. But I'll be damned if Bella demands to sleep on the couch. Just like before, I didn't give her a chance to argue as I strode back over to the door where she still stood. She looked so lost. I craved her even though I was only two feet from her. Our eyes met and something clicked. I shivered and I heard her breath hitch. All the fear and discomfort she held in them before were gone and they seemed to glisten with something else. The same look that she had on her face right before I kissed her, really kissed her that second time. And my lips started to tingle, like they were remembering what it felt like to kiss the perfect angel. Her pink tongue darted out and glided across her lips. That was all I needed.

"Edward."

"I know."

She reached an arm back and closed the door behind her, clicking the lock. No sooner had she finished when I closed the distance between us by wrapping my arms around her slim waist. Her arms wound around my neck and her fingers locked into my hair. And I crashed my lips to hers.

**So, did I fix the kiss for you? This is a bit of filler as I wanted to post something so I didn't get too far behind. The next chapter should be out much sooner than this one! Please review!**


	18. Chapter 18

**I know, this took forever. And I'm sorry, I really am. There were some deaths in the family, a string of them, and the formalities of it all just took up all of my time. Thank you for staying with me and I hope this chapter makes up for everything. **

Her sweet lips followed. I couldn't get close enough. I pressed my chest up against hers, feeling her hips meet mine in our collision and her hands in my hair. Holy hell. She made me feel dizzy and perfectly solid all at the same time. I lifted her up off the ground slightly and walked forward a few steps so that her back was against the door. Now I wouldn't fall over like a leaf in the wind because my girlfriend knocks the air out of me. Girlfriend. Is that even an appropriate name for it? It felt like so much more, a lot stronger than just 'girlfriend'. Other half to my being is more like it. I don't know. I'll ask Alice later.

Our tongues battled for dominance as the kiss escalated. My groin started to tingle and I felt my little southern buddy get antsy. Better nip that in the bud before things get messy. It took all of my strength to pull my lips from hers, while she tugged on my hair and made the sexiest little moans I had ever heard, but I did it. I broke away and heard her take a gasp of air, just as I did the same. Breathing while practically swallowing your significant other isn't exactly possible. But I still craved her. My lips still begged to feel her and my tongue itched to taste her. What she does to me. I groaned from deep within my chest and began a trail of hot, wet, open-mouthed kisses from the side of her swollen lips across her delicate jaw line, then taking a detour to graze my teeth over her ear lobe. She fucking whimpered when I did that. She pulled my hair harder, craning her neck to the side to give me better access. She makes me so damn hot. I kept kissing a trail from her ear down her neck, paying special attention to her pulse point. It was warm and sweeter than the rest of her skin. And her smell. It was even stronger right there and it was the most potent, amazing thing I had ever experienced, aside from kissing her. Beautiful, so fucking beautiful. She moaned again, quiet and sweet.

And then I stopped myself. That moan. Because she sounded so innocent and pure right then, with that moan. It was too good and too sweet and too naive to know what a filthy dog I am. I couldn't do this to her. She had no idea what I am capable of. I needed to be more for her. With a gush of air and all of the strength I had, I tore myself away from her, wincing as some of my hair was still locked in her tiny fists. I was gasping for breath, fighting off every urge I knew to be true and demanding more of myself as I looked at her. She was still leaning against the door but her hair was a mess and she was breathing just as hard as I was, her eyes down cast.

The expression on her face was frantic, confused. I ruined her. I had done this to my beautiful angel. She ran a shaky hand through her hair, taming it almost, and adjusted the bottom of her shirt. Her porcelain chest still heaved with each breath she took as she regained her composure. And she looked up at me. Her eyes glimmered with something, I wasn't sure what, and she searched my face just as I did hers. I had nothing left to give her. I had already taken so much. I cleared my throat and looked away, at the couch where I would leave my shit while I slept downstairs for the night. She wouldn't want me in the room with her. I was too ashamed of myself to look her in the eye. She's so beautiful, even after I ruined her with that pathetic excuse for a kiss. But I still couldn't deny how good it felt. I shivered from the aftershock.

"I'm sorry."

I didn't recognize my own damned voice. It sounded like it belonged to some old guy in an alley somewhere. It was grovely and quiet. My chest ached. I failed her.

"F-for what?"

Her breathing had evened out and she sounded a little pissed off. As she should be. I looked up at her. Her arms were crossed over her chest and she leaned back comfortably against the door. Her eyebrows were scrunched a little and her face was flushed. So sexy. I couldn't even find words to do her justice. It's like….a dusting of the purest pink color over perfectly clean snow. Does that even make sense? Fuck if I know.

"For attacking you like that. It wasn't right. I'm sorry."

She snorted.

"I don't remember the part where I told you to stop."

She smirked slightly and rolled her eyes, taking a step closer to me. I got a tingling feeling in my groin again, just from being closer to her. I'm hopeless. Bella looked up at me with those big doe eyes and I felt lost in the chocolate pools.

"Because I didn't tell you to stop, Edward. I would have said so if I didn't want it as well. You did nothing wrong."

No. I shook my head and let out a sharp exhale, turning on my heel and walking to the bed. I sat down on the edge and rested my elbows on my bent knees. My face fell into my hands. I shook my head again.

"You don't want the same things I do. You don't understand my intentions. Bella, I'm horrible and disgusting."

My words were muffled by my hands but they were still understandable. I heard her shift her weight from one foot to the other. I'm such a bastard. She cleared her throat quietly and her breathing changed.

"How do you uh, how do you know I don't understand your intentions? How do you know we don't want the same things?"

I looked up. Fuck me. Because she is everything that is good and right and pure. And I am so wrong. How the hell do I explain it to her? What would make her understand what an animal, a monster I am? My stomach clenched and I had to look away. She was looking at me with such longing, longing to understand me. Good luck, my angel. She made a vow to herself to stay pure, and I had pushed her so far that she was pushed up against a door and had her neck open to me. If I hadn't pushed, would she be so willing to kiss me like that? I sighed and shook my head.

"I know you aren't like other girls. And that's why I want to be with you. I want to be everything for you because of that. You're different, and I've never wanted a girl who was so different in that way-"

"Edward, what are you talking about? How am I 'different in that way'?"

I looked up to see her staring back at me with the most confused expression on her face. I didn't think I had been too cryptic.

"Well, you know, your….._vow_."

"My vow."

Her voice was a little sharp and her brow wrinkled. She ran her fingers through her hair. It's so shiny and soft. So perfect. I watched as she blushed and looked down at the floor.

"What _about_ my vow?"

I sighed and shook my head. She hadn't wanted to tell me about it.

"You wanted to stay a virgin until marriage?"

It came out more of a question. I felt so unsure of myself. It seemed wrong to be talking to her about it like this, under these circumstances. I rubbed my hands over my face and let out a deep breath of air. She didn't say anything, just cleared her throat and looked around the room nervously.

"Before you judge me, can I just tell you why?"

"I never judged you, Bella. But I would like to know why."

Hell, I had casual sex just about as often as I showered. I am one clean bastard. But that was all out the window. My beautiful Bella. Her soft pink tongue darted out to wet her perfectly oversized top lip.

"I just….if you love me enough to marry me then you love me enough to have all of me. I know it sounds dumb, because people just do it all the time. And I probably won't even find that anyway…"

I blinked and watched as she wrung her hands together, looking down at the floor and shifting her weight uncomfortably. I didn't know what to say. I had never encountered another girl like her before. She respected herself, and knew that she wanted to be loved. And when she said that, I knew it. She didn't deserve sex. She didn't deserve to have someone take her without a second though. No, not my Bella. She deserved to be worshiped, glorified, put up on the highest pedestal. And I knew that only I could ever treat her that way. Nobody on this Earth could possibly understand what she is worth, not like I could. Nothing about what I wanted to do to Bella was casual. I wanted to worship her till the ends of time. I'd spend hours just pouring over her skin, taking her all in. My lips would caress each and every freckle. I'd memorize every hair. I'd count every scar she had from falling, which she did often. And I'd relish in every fucking dip, curve, and swell of her heavenly, glorious body.

And then it clicked. I don't know how, I don't know why, and I don't know what, but it happened. This chemical reaction in my brain, like my gears started to shift in a new direction. Is that even possible? Fuck if I know. My chest contracted, my throat closing as I tried to inhale normally. No cigar. I got this burning feeling in the pit of my stomach that radiated up to my lips and they tingled. I heard myself wheeze. So this is what is felt like.

"Edward?"

I looked up. My beautiful, perfect angel. She looked back at me with wide eyes. Obviously I was scaring the shit out of her. She licked her lips again, half cocked a brow at me, and shifted her weight to the other foot. My heart fluttered and my stomach did flips. I got this tingling feeling on my lips again. Ahh. So this is what it felt like. How had I lived so long without knowing what this felt like?

My lips spread into the biggest, most ridiculous grin I had ever had in my entire life. I couldn't help it. I fucking smiled like a little kid on Christmas. Just because it felt so damn good to want her like this.

"Edward? What the hell is wrong with you?"

I must have looked like an absolute nut, because my beautiful Bella's voice wavered and barely came out in a whisper. Rightly so. How would you feel if you just told someone your feelings like that and they just smiled at you? But she didn't know why I was smiling. I stood up and went to her. I got that little electrical pulse again as soon as I was within a few feet of her, then I was right up in front of her. It felt so fucking good. I inhaled deeply. She smelled like heaven and I relished it.

Bella looked up at me through her thick lashes, her nose level with my chest. Her muddy hair shined and her breathing was shallow. We were so fucking close. Her cheeks flushed and she took her bottom lip into her mouth. I still smiled like a moron. I am a moron. One fucking happy moron.

"Edward, please say something."

"I love you."

It came out so easily I was surprised I hadn't realized it sooner. It flowed out and my heart raced with each syllable. She looked up then, her deep brown eyes startlingly expressive and open, like she was giving me her soul. I felt guilty for looking into them, like I was taking so much from her. She took her bottom lip into her mouth again. I wanted to suck it out.

"Edward, if you're just saying that to get into my pants…"

I shook my head and smiled wider. My hands wound around to her back and I pulled her flush against me, never taking my eyes away from hers. She felt so good and my lips tingled. So this is what it felt like, to be so in love with somebody that you were in pain until you could touch them again. I just stared into her eyes and the strangling feeling I had earlier vanished. My perfect angel made me feel so good.

"No, Bella. I love you so much that I _don't _want to get into your pants."

"That doesn't make sense."

"Nothing does anymore."

I grinned again like the stupid Cheshire Cat. How could I not love her? The world was a better place, just for the fact that Isabella Swan was in it. What was wrong, she made right. And for every heinous or ugly thing, there was Bella to counteract it.

Our breaths mingled between us as she looked up at me, and the tension thickened. And we just stared. Her eyes searched mine, for truth I'm sure, and I just smiled like a complete fool. She blinked, and then narrowed her eyebrows, giving her that little crease that makes her look pensive. I leaned down at kissed it.

"I don't think you really love me."

"Oh, trust me, Bella. You fucking move me."

"But what if I can't say it back?"

"Love sought is good, but given unsought is better."

"You're quoting Shakespeare again."

I laughed a little. How could she not see? I was completely, irrevocably in love with her. She felt so right in my arms and I tightened my hold a bit. I leaned down again and placed a soft kiss to the tip of her cute little nose, then to her chin, and finally to her petal soft lips. I kissed her gently and sweetly, pouring every bit of feeling I had for her into that kiss. But I didn't dare press any harder. She had to see what she meant to me.

And I sighed into her lips, because her arms finally left her sides and they snaked up to wrap around my neck, pulling me down closer to her. She sighed, too. She couldn't fucking deny it. I needed her like I needed the air I breathed. Her lips moved against mine, her soft tongue running along the length of my bottom lip. I groaned. She smiled. I groaned again, and then pulled away. Her eyes found mine and she looked serious gain. I shook my head and sighed.

"I know what you're afraid of, Bella. But, just let me love you. OK? You don't have to say it back. Ever, if you don't want to."

But it would hurt like hell if she never wanted to say it. Regardless, I'd love her still. I whispered, like it would shatter her world if I was too loud. She continued to look up at me through her eyelashes and shook her head, a little panicked looking. Her arms tightened around my neck.

"No, Edwa-"

"Hey, Dominatrix Barbie, unchain your pet. We need Edward back so he can choose the movie. It's his turn."

With that came a loud thud as Emmett's fist pounded on the door once. Yeah, we got it, asshole. Bella buried her face into my chest and I felt her hot breath through my shirt. So good. I sighed and kissed the top of her head, running my hand up and down her bare arm around my neck.

"I guess that was our cue."

She nodded, her face still pressed into me.

Emmett pressed play on the DVD player and we all sank back into our respective seats to watch the movie. 300. I fucking love that movie. Alice and Jasper were haphazardly thrown on a lounge chair and Rose was waiting for Emmett on the other couch. Bella and I sat tucked into the corner of the love seat. How appropriate. I smiled to myself in the dark and kissed the top of her head. She felt so warm against my side, her knees bent with the back of her heels pressing back into her butt. She was so small compared to my frame. I'm not the biggest mother fucker in the room, but at 6'2 I command some presence. And my beautiful Bella can't be more than 5'4. Her head was resting on my shoulder with my arm wrapped around hers.

"Edward, why do we have to watch this movie?"

"It's good."

"Thank you, Jasper. Yes, it's good."

I sighed and rolled my eyes at my sister. In turn, she winked at me. She loved this whole situation, me and Bella. Really, I think she just liked Bella more than me. They had this thing going. Bella was the reasonable, sensible one with a normally functioning brain. Alice, well. Hnh. I love her to death, really, but she's nutty. She isn't stupid, by any means. She's just too fast for most people to put up with. Everything she does is at 90 mph. It works for Jasper. Actually, Jasper and Bella are really the only ones that can put up with her for long periods of time.

Once, in 9th grade, Emmett decided it would be a good idea to try hang gliding while we were on a group family vacation in Mexico. And just like with every other bad idea we had, because Emmett was going, Jasper and I just went along. Then the girls decided they wanted to come. Our parents were busy at the bar, minus Carlisle who was working. So, we went. In the end, I was paired up with Rosalie and we landed fine. I almost committed suicide midair, but we landed fine. Emmett landed fine in his own contraption, because he was too big to pair up with anybody. Then there was Alice and Jasper. Alice had steered them into a cliff where they got hung up by their glider. It took four hours for the staff to take them down. The entire time, Alice was talking a mile a minute, suggesting different activities for us to do, asking questions. The entire time, Jasper was just smiling and nodding a long. He didn't speak once. The staff said that they were the best emergency case they'd ever had. Neither of them freaked and they didn't fight. They get along like that. Alice is Alice and Jasper just….is. He doesn't talk much and if he moved any slower, you'd think he was in a coma. They balance each other.

I smirked to myself as I recalled the memory. That was how I knew I wouldn't have to kill Jasper for being with my little sister. Everyone around me was watching the movie. I felt Bella sigh at the exchange between the main love interests in the movie. I kissed the top of her head again and she wiggled herself deeper into my side. My arm tightened around her torso. I fucking love her. Emmett and Rosalie were busy rustling under a blanket on their couch. Unbelievable. They just didn't stop, ever. But, they do love each other. Rosalie has this thing about being uncomfortable around guys. Fuck if I know why. But Emmett makes her feel safe. And Emmett likes to feel needed. Another balance, I figured.

But how could Bella and I work? I watched the movie and thought. I mindlessly drew little circles all over her bare arm. My eyes were drawn down to my love in my arms. I couldn't help but want to look at her. I never knew jeans and a sweatshirt could make me want a girl so badly. Her legs stretched on forever and that waist...so tiny and delicate. That heart shaped face, so perfectly innocent and untouched. Her gorgeous lips were so full, oddly uneven but perfect. Her little nose, almost cute, but still angular. Her eyes, hidden from me beneath a curtain of thick lashes. Again, with the fucking poetry. They were sort of wide set, huge like she'd seen a fucking ghost, and sparkling. Sparkling like fucking diamonds and I couldn't look away. All I wanted to do was run my fingers through her thick hair. It shined in the light from the screen and bounced around her slender shoulders with each breath. So beautiful.

She looked back at me with puppy dog eyes once she felt me watching her, eyebrows turned up slightly in confusion. Stop it, Bella, if you plan on staying a virgin until marriage. I couldn't take it anymore. She took her perfect bottom lip into her mouth, chewing on it gently as she watched me. I leaned forward and captured her lips in a gentle kiss, tender. Pulling away first, I leaned down and whispered softly into her ear.

"I love you."

This got me another gentle kiss and her snuggling her head into my shoulder, where it remained until the end of the movie. Once the credits rolled, I took stock of the room. Jasper and Alice had already gone to their room and Rosalie was asleep where Emmett had left her to take the DVD out. I looked down. Bella was asleep on me. Her lips were parted into a tiny 'o'. So adorable. I smiled slightly to myself.

"She doesn't throw up at the sight of your face, Edwin. I'm shocked."

Emmett whispered harshly in the dark and laughed quietly, moving over to the couch to pick up Rosalie. Once he had her in his arms, he kissed her nose softly.

"You know, I have been known to attract a few girls."

Emmett shook his head and began to head towards the stairs.

"Yeah, but I'm kind of proud of you for picking one. Even if you haven't been around as much."

And he went up the stairs. Proud of me? They've all said it to me, except for Rosalie. And then it dawned on me. The Beauty and The Beast. That was our balance. I was such a callous prick before Bella. I was truly the epitome of asshole. I threw people away without a care; I hurt people for my own personal gain. And then my perfect, beautiful angel, a true Beauty, rocked my world and threw me out to the dogs. She chewed me up and spit me out, and I came crawling back, begging. And she saw the real man in me, and she agreed to help bring him out. I've been saved.

I carefully scooted Bella on to my lap and wrapped my arms securely around her so that one was tucked beneath her knees and one was under her shoulders. Her head was still resting on my shoulder, one of her palms pressed against my chest. Once upstairs, I kneed open the door to the room she was staying in. I made sure to lie her down as gently as possible, and I pulled the blankets up on the bed so that she wouldn't get cold. I had a small mental debate with myself over whether or not to put pajamas on her, but I figured that would be taking it too far.

She looked so peaceful and soft that it took a moment for me to pull myself away. I grabbed a spare pillow on the floor and turned for the door.

"Stay with me."

I froze where I was, facing the door, pillow in hand. Those three words, her voice just a whisper, I almost passed out. Slowly, I turned, and caught her eyes. They were open, though barely, and she looked as if she would fall back asleep any moment. How could I deny her? I nodded wordlessly and walked to the other side of the bed, toeing off my shoes and pulling my sweatshirt off so that I was just in my boxers. She reached down next to her, to her bag on the floor, and pulled out a pair of flannel pants. She changed adeptly under the blankets and tossed her jeans to the floor, then pulled back the blankets. I watched her carefully as I climbed under the blankets, holding my breath. I finally settled down and lay my head on the pillow, closing my eyes. And then the bed shifted. The mattress dipped ever so slightly, and the pillows moved just a bit until I felt a warm, small body wrapped around my side. I opened my eyes. My beautiful Bella's head was just where it had been during the movie, her palm open on my bare chest. My little buddy down south stirred a bit. I sighed and kissed her head, closing my eyes. God help me. This was going to be a long night. But the best fucking night of my life.

**Please review ******** Things are starting to pick up for them and we'll see some good BellaXEdward interactions. **


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